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Bonus:

Capt. Jack Aubrey - For Anon

CAPTAIN JACK “GOLDILOCKS” AUBREY

Jack took the wheel, and as he did so a last gust from the island staggered the sloop…plucking Jack’s hat from his head and streaming bright yellow hair away to the south-south-west. • ‘We call him Goldilocks in the service, you know, in much the same way as they call me Hellfire Davy, or Thundering Richards…’ ⎈ Patrick O’Brien, Master and Commander

bonus:

Each lacewing spends about 5 days maturing inside its cacoon, and then it cuts an opening in the top and emerges as a fully-developed adult.

Above: a common green lacewing emerging from its cocoon

Green lacewing larvae (genus Chrysopidae) are also known as "aphid lions," because they're voracious predators that often feed on aphids. They've also been known to prey upon caterpillars, leafhoppers, planthoppers, thrips, spiders, mites, and insect eggs, which is why they're widely used to help eradicate pests in agricultural contexts.

Once the lacewing nears the end of its larval stage, it builds a small cacoon out of silk and then tucks itself inside, allowing the pupal phase to begin. Its tiny green body is often partially visible through the thin, loosely-woven walls of the cacoon.

Above: a lacewing developing within its cocoon

These breathtaking photos of a lacewing climbing out of its cacoon were taken by a Danish photographer named Frederik Leck Fischer.

Above: the lacewing preparing to emerge

When the insect initially emerges, its wings and antennae are still compactly folded down against its body, and the wings have a dark, shriveled appearance that makes them almost unrecognizable.

Above: the fully-developed lacewing waiting for its wings to expand

The wings then gradually expand until they have reached their full size, which usually takes about an hour or two.

Above: the same lacewing just a few hours later

Fischer's photographs provide a stunning account of the entire process.

Above: close-up of a common green lacewing

This is a rewritten version of a post that I originally published three years ago.

Sources & More Info:

iNaturalist: Common Green Lacewing

University of California: Family Chrysopidae

Texas A&M: The Green Lacewing

Washington State University: Lacewings

Tennessee State University: Insect Predators: Green Lacewings (PDF)

Walter White in Mario Kart Wii

https://m.youtube.com/c/TheChiptuner

in the first panel a trio of adventurers walk down a hallway. one has a sword and shield, one has a bow, one has a large axe. the one with the axe asks “Who has the torch?”

But I know. I think it was me.

In my defense I never intended to start a rumor. Many years ago I worked as a cleaner at the school and one evening I had to transport one of those big floor washing machines from the basement to the second level via the elevator. When the doors opened a very confused looking man stood inside. He was one of those slicked back gym-bro IT guys and made no movement to get out. The elevator wouldn’t fit him, me and the machine so I asked “Where are you going? Up or down?”

He gave me a smug shit-eating grin and said “Down?” in a mocking tone.

It took me a second to realize that of course he wasn’t going down, we were in the basement, but his look and tone annoyed me so much I refused to admit I misspoke and instead said “Yeah, down. I don’t know if you’re going to the second basement”

His smile disappeared “There’s a second basement?”

“Yeah but it sounds like you don’t have access to it so I guess you’re going up? I’ll just wait”

I never thought of it as anything other than a funny story to tell about that time I got so annoyed with a guy that I invented an entire second basement, but it turns out he probably refused to believe a cleaner fooled him and the story spread.