and shane says, "who is it?"

"lily!"

"oh." shane immediately sets aside what he's doing and walks over, saying to his mom, "that's ilya."

yuna looks at him in confusion as he picks up his phone. "why is ilya saved as 'lily' in your phone?"

and shane looks at her, away, shrugs as if it's obvious and simply says, "I can't have ilya rozanov saved on my phone, mom" before answering the call with a, "hey, baby" and walking away.

Her and David just stand there and they are so angry and ashamed of their son.

They love Ilya. Ilya has given up a lot to be with Shane, they have both put so much on the line for him to just “hey baby?” A random woman with NO SHAME.

Yuna may be spiralling in whispered yells but David is equally shocked.

“He’s gay. Right?”

They sit on the sofa just staring at each other. Yuna says they have to talk to him and HE has to talk to Ilya.

David says they shouldn’t jump to conclusions and not to attack him.

They go in circles until Shane comes back into the room 20 minutes later, happy as a clam until he sees them on the sofa.

“What’s wrong?”

“Sit down.” Yuna barks in a tone she hasn’t used on him since he was in grade school.

Shane sits down, hands fidgeting.

“We are so disappointed in you, Shane-“

“Now, Yuna…”

“No, David. I can’t believe this… Ilya deserves so much better”

Shane has never been so hurt or so confused in his entire life. He can’t think of a single thing he could have done recently. He was playing a good season, he had been great for all of his sponsers. Had he forgotten some event for Ilya? The anniversary of his mother’s death wasn’t for another month. His Birthday had long gone and their anniversary wasn’t for two weeks…

“I… what?”

“Lily? Who is Lily, Shane”

Relief sweeps over him and he starts to laugh hysterically. He picks his phone up and goes to Lily’s number. It only rings once.

“Did you forget something, sweetheart?” Ilya’s voice comes through the room and realisation dawns on Yuna. And embarrassment and shame.

“No, but you are right. My parents totally love you more than me.” He is still laughing and although that should hurt all he feels is joy for Ilya.

“Yes, obviously.”

“You are on loud speaker by the way.”

“Uhh hi Ilya” David says sheepishly.

“Hello Hollanders- why is fiancé dying of laughter?”

“Why are you saved as Lily in his phone?” Yuna asked.

There was a beat of silence while Ilya puts it together

“Ahhhhh. I see. You protecting me from my cheating fiancé, thank you.” He says it with a voice full of laughter but there is a hint of earnestness behind it. “For protection. I am his Lily, he is my Jane no one suspects when they see us texting.”

TIDYING means clearing space, making your environment orderly and inviting. it usually entails removing clutter from surfaces, clearing the floor so you can move around easily, and creating psychological ease by putting everything visibly in its place. It's very visual, and can also involve things like straightening picture frames, squaring pillows, folding blankets on the couch, etc. It reduces chaos and noise and makes a space comfortable.

ORGANISING means sifting through belongings, ensuring that what doesn't need to be kept is thrown out and what does need to be kept is kept well. This often means categorising by room and function – teaspoons go in the teaspoon drawer, and the teaspoon drawer stays in the kitchen. It can also mean indexing things so you can find them easily (markers sorted by colour, paperwork divided into topical folders, books alphabetised) and preserving things (moving photos out of direct sunlight, keeping open flour in a sealed container, sleeving trading cards).

CLEANING means removing built up dirt, dust and grime, reducing the level of environmental contaminants and making your space sanitary. Bacteria are a fact of life, they love to hang out in dust and cling to pet hair and multiply on any given surface. Cleaning is how you keep that stuff in check, preventing it from building up to the point it affects your health. This means wiping frequently touched surfaces with disinfectant, sanitising utensils (doing the dishes), washing bedding and clothes (and yourself), and sweeping/vacuuming and taking out the trash to physically remove dirt from your home.

Tidying is not the same thing as organising – shove the mail, bills, dirty teaspoons and your gardening gloves in a drawer, and you've tidied the table. Sort the paperwork into piles by deadline, put the teaspoons in a cup, and roll the gloves together so they don't get separated, and the table is untidy but organised.

Similarly, a tidy or organised space can still be filthy. Just because all the yellowed newspapers and trash bags are sorted by date in the basement, out of sight, doesn't mean they're clean. A chaotic, cluttered space can still be very sanitary if it's being kept clear of refuse, and wiped and dusted often.

gulf winds   | 31K | "I do not," Shane said, which was a lie. "And you should reflect on why you like to make your boyfriend upset so often." "My boyfriend likes to be upset," Ilya said. He was leaning fully over into Shane's space now, his elbow on the center console bearing so much of his weight as he swayed, almost accidentally closer. He was giddy, childish, how had he forgotten how good it felt to be with Shane, just to be next to him and talk – "Is there a rest stop coming up?" Natalya asked from the backseat, and Ilya didn't flinch, exactly, but it was a near thing. He'd almost forgotten she was there.| The best 'Ilya gets stuck with his niece' fic I've read so far. Everyone is messy and complicated and ends up hurting each other. Ilya's niece feels like a real teenager. And of course getting saddled with a teenager completely derails Shane and Ilya's Ottawa plan. Realistic consequences make for great conflict and storytelling. Lovely structure (non-linear narration with different intertwined storylines).

get gone | 11K | Shane tries to grab at the right words. "She's not - it's not that simple. Shane Hollander is me but it's also like - it's a thing people use to sell something. It's like a cardboard cutout of me."|   Great story that deals well with Shane's anger, his complicated relationship with his public persona and, last but not least, how and when he and Ilya fight. Also does a good job of showing the less nice side of Yuna Hollander, momager. This author has a superb handle on Shane's characterisation, imo. 

It’s Kind of a Funny Story by @flawlessassholes | 31K | Nobody knows if Ilya Rozanov tried to kill himself before the draft. Nobody sane goes first overall. And nobody knows if Shane Hollander is going to survive another mediocre season with the Boston Raiders. Isn’t it funny how a single nick in the ice can change the entire game?| My note for this fic simply says "mental health AU" which probably is very indicative of the gibbering mess I was when I was done reading. Take this as a warning, ok? In this AU both Ilya and Shane have mental health issues, everything is handled very well, as far as I can tell, but I also must say this story hit too close to home for me, so I can't be very objective about it. I also gathered this is inspired by a book, but I've never read it and was able to enjoy this without any prior knowledge, FYI. 

System Collapse by @darlingofdots | 7.6K | Shane Hollander has severe food allergies. Fortunately, his teammates don't know that. Unfortunately, his teammates don't know that.| There seems to be a niche (but not too niche) fanon that Shane has severe food allergies and I think this lends itself very well to exploring certain sides of Shane (when it doesn't delve into misery!porn) and when I saw @darlingofdots had written a story about it, I knew it was going to be excellent. Fantastic Hayden and Jackie as supportive friends. Love the story structure too and the way therapy is portrayed here. I really hope the author will write more because there's a few threads that could be explored more. 

lotophage by @citrusses | 9.8K | During a game against the Boston Raiders, the Metros’ star center Shane Hollander sustains a concussion. Six months later, he still has no memory of his life before the injury.| This fandom has a thing for amnesia fic, I've read so many stories (most of them excellent) so I honestly didn't think anyone could possibly write one that would put a new spin on the trope, you know? Ha. I was a fool. @citrusses gives us a devastating amnesiac Shane. Superb writing. One of those stories that went straight to my Kindle for future re-reading. 

Just a Formality by @catherineland| 12K | AU where Shane and Ilya do not get caught by David in 2017. And for an entire year Shane hasn't been able to come out to his parents. Ilya gets a concussion, and Yuna gets a call.| A lovely Yuna POV. 

a pox on all your houses by @the-apocrypha| 20K | Chlamydia?" Ilya has never heard Hollander's voice reach such heights in the absence of a cock. "You have chlamydia?" "I did not get it on purpose," Ilya complains.| The one where Ilya gives Shane chlamydia and it's actually a good thing for their relationship. So funny. Perfect character voices. 

Your Flight Has Been Delayed | 25K | Ilya Rozanov is many things—a pain in Shane Hollander’s ass, hockey’s biggest playboy, a better chirper in his second language than most people are in their first, the only player who can challenge Shane for the title of “best of his generation.” But when Shane and Ilya get stuck next to each other on a long-delayed flight to the MLH Awards, Shane realizes something else about him: Ilya Rozanov is hot.|  Cute AU with a different first meet. Fun, good character voices. . I've just realised a second chapter has been added since I read this! Exciting. I'll read it soon, but right now I'll just say the first chapter worked perfectly well as a standalone for me. 

Farewell Mother Russia | 16K | After a decade of careful hiding, that’s that. Everyone is saying his biggest secret out loud. Ilya Rozanov sucks cock. Ilya Rozanov fucks men. Ilya Rozanov isn’t straight. It doesn’t feel quite as life crushing as he imagined it would. A calmness settles into his body. It reminds him of those minutes right after you break a bone, when the damage is already done and you know there’s nothing you can do but sit with it. It hasn’t even been four years since Russia passed the excessively named Law for the Purpose of Protecting Children from Information Advocating a Denial of Traditional Family Values. He can’t think about that now.| Canon divergence AU in which Ilya is outed. Lovely Ilya POV and exploration of his feelings for his family and country. 

Exhibit A by @coffeedrgn87| 6.4K | Ilya Rozanov has photographic evidence that could destroy Shane Hollander's reputation. At least, that's what the internet thinks. Briefly.| Sweet and funny. Good characterisation.

Unusual Expenses | 3K | Once Shane's parents know about his relationship with Ilya, they begin treating him accordingly. Ilya is prepared for this. Until he's not. Or, sometimes love comes in the form of unexpected lectures on the rules regarding taxation of capital gains by foreign nationals residing in Canada. And then Shane picks up the pieces.|

Doing The Work by @bomberqueen17| 3.4K | AN:  i know enough about hockey to know there's no way a teenaged rookie from a foreign country would have been left to get his own apartment in his first season. no way, he was in somebody's house. so this is whose house he was in, and what he did there.| Technically this is an AU, but not quite, everything that happens in this fic could have happened in canon, just off-screen/off-page. It's a fantastic vignette  about Ilya's rookie year and the vet family who put him up that season. Love OCs when they're done well like here. 

Do you think about me? Do you think about us? by @queengoose| 3.3K | Shane knows that the opinion of one eighth grade girl from the Boston suburbs is not the thing that will make or break his career. It would matter exactly the same if she was from Montreal, or Texas, or the moon. Which is to say, not at all. She’s not even a hockey fan. Her opinion and her comment are nothing. It doesn’t feel like it’s nothing, though.|  Peak 2014, Shane and Ilya do the ice-bucket challenge. So much fun and perfectly in character for that time in the situationship and the internet era, so to speak. The author had such a stroke of genius.

“people who can afford homes —“ are typically 400-600k in debt for them. also if “can own your own home” is your threshold for the rich you are contemplating eating, i think you are genuinely stupid

use a mug, barton, you fucking animal

I do not have to reinvent the wheel every time I write fanfiction

I do not have to make every chapter's word count above 1,000 in order for it to be good

It is okay if some things don't make sense

I can write whatever I want

I am writing this shit for free

If people don't like my stuff, they can block me. If they're being mean about it, I can block them.

The most important part of writing fanfiction is having fun

Writing fanfiction is supposed to be fun

I do not have to appeal to people

This shit is fun

Other useful AI Removal/Detection links

How to spot AI Hallucinations like a Reference Librarian (originally on Substack)

The pool is almost empty.

Leandro Erlich’s Swimming Pool creates the illusion of people standing underwater — but only a thin layer of real water sits above a transparent glass surface.

Below it, visitors walk through a dry chamber, while people above see them as if they are submerged.

The work turns a simple architectural element into a visual trick: Surface becomes depth, and the ordinary becomes impossible.

this painting by andrew wyeth has got SO many ghosts in it. most andrew wyeth paintings have ghosts in, but this is off the scale!

this painting by dragan bibin has only one ghost as far as i can tell, but it's a really scary ghost (the dog thinks so too)

this painting by meraud guevara looks very peaceful, but unfortunately it has a ghost in it. i can't tell you where, but it does

you might think you can see the ghosts in this dorothea tanning painting, but you're wrong. the little girls are just ordinary girls. the actual ghost is behind one of those doors.

“What we do in life echoes in eternity”

~ Maximus