Who Needs Titles These Days

manager today asked if i’d face paint for an event my work is hosting and she said “you can face paint, right? we all just assumed you could face paint” which is a fun assessment of my character

This what I mean when I say science writing is terrible and you need to actually go back to the academic publications themselves to get what’s going on

if you yearn hard enough you should be able to have the thing you want

for sale: Baby Shoes Stylish Infant Boy Girl Unisex First Walker Shoes Toddler Walking Crib Shoes Lightweight Non-Slip Sneakers For 6 9 12 18 24 Months Baby Shoes New With Tags New In Box Excellent Condition Never Worn

Cutting my electric bill down to 0.00001% of its current cost by inventing a lightbulb that calculates my position and only produces the exact set of photons which will bounce off all the surfaces and hit my eyes directly

Letting you stumble and flop around my seemingly pitch-black house while I navigate it with ease because I haven’t invented the lightbulb that can do this for two people at once yet

“I’m gonna beat the absolute shit out of a robber one day” I tell you while you trip on my carpet. “I’m gonna go Daredevil on his ass.” You can’t see it but you’re making such the stupidest face right now

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?

most embarrassing thing someone can see is your youtube home page. id rather they walk in on me naked