i got nightmare eyes

Times are hard at the cafe so they only got Something bagels

and now some words from our sponsor: LESBIAN KNIFEPLAY

I have never, and will never, use "ofc" to mean "of fucking course". It literally stands for OF Course...

I'm very very glad that my knee-jerk, gut-feeling, primal-instinct reaction to seeing a Default Influencer is embarrassment. I think this saves me from a lot of bullshit.

To be clear ☝️, absolutely not gender-exclusive. Some broccoli-haired shirtless 23-year-old man on enough trenbolone to euthanize a different horse starts talking about how to be a high-value male and I start thinking instantly about how I'd have 4,000 slugs use me as a jungle-gym before I'd want this man within cootie-contagion distance of me.

Respect for my soldiers… she’s saving him… the hons…

This is a really fantastic return to form for this genre of post. In recent years there's been less and less effort put into this vital aspect of internet culture, it's nice to see a return to the truly artisanal work of the late 00s.

Now THIS is what the internet exists for. I was LOCKED IN the whole time.

i'm very happy with cookie clicker's success of course but it's difficult to tell if it was a freak fluke or if there was some sort of unsuspected secret sauce at play. could i do it again. modesty aside somewhere in my hundreds of design docs for other game ideas there could be the game industry equivalent of a nuclear bomb. i must tread lightly

[lazy as shit, doesn't make anything] i.m saving the world

when you eat a Normal Sandwich (bread meat greens cheese relish) and your body goes ooohhh fuck! oh fuck! what have you done! heartbeat GO! sweating GO! temperature GO! like sorry man I'm just trying to keep you WORKING!!!!!!!! ASS HOLE!

Everyone say thank you sanitation workers we owe you our lives sanitation workers