Have Fun and Be Yourself

tequila is like drinking the tears of a very happy young woman and whiskey is like drinking the tears of a very sad old man and gin is like drinking the tears of a closeted gay man named james

Having a job is an awesome way to stay hydrated because you get so bored you start drinking water just for a little excitement

i bet it feels good to be an underwater plant just swaying in sync with the flow of water

I love how baseball announcers can just have a little chat while the game happens it's the greatest sport of all time

I’d die on the hill that “stranger danger” is a deeply unhelpful mentality to have. “Ooooh everyone is out to get me they’re all gonna perpetrate harm that’s actually more likely to come from someone I already know. I better never talk to anyone in my community who I don’t already know, just to be safe. I’m sure there are no other biases interwoven with this mentality” like oh my god human traffickers do not just randomly spawn in every parking lot. You don’t have to go solo hitchhiking across the country but you also don’t have to live in fear that every guy on the street is the knife man who’s gonna get you. Like have situational awareness, yeah. But most of the time the guy on the street is not knife man he’s actually just a guy on the street and he’s probably pretty chill, and you’re driving yourself crazy by living in a constant state of unnecessary fear.

not even allowed to write something wrong now in this perfect world sorry to all the perfect brothers and sisters out there