MOODBOARD FOR WHEN SHIT IS FUCK
Fai_Ryy
noise dept.
tumblr dot com
Jules of Nature
hello vonnie
we're not kids anymore.
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

#extradirty
taylor price
Keni

bliss lane
The Stonewall Inn

Product Placement

izzy's playlists!
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

🪼
trying on a metaphor

Discoholic 🪩

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@saintrenee
MOODBOARD FOR WHEN SHIT IS FUCK

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“Why did the bright queen believe essek so easily how did he get away with so much shit before he was caught?” Buddy you would not believe what you can get away with if you’re Quiet and Get Good Grades
Mitch McConnell's pr team right now:
The facial expressions of everyone trying not to lose it are killing me
This is painfully American
Americans be like it is totally normal for an entire stadium (including military members) to stand at attention while a fast food clown mascot sings the national anthem
when we say "it is functionally impossible to parody Americans in a way that will actually insult them" this is the sort of thing you're up against. is your sick burn funnier than corporation burger clown sing national anthem baseball game? no?? of course it isn't.
i think people really under sell the physical side effects of mental health disorders sometimes. like sure the depression and anxiety may be 'just in your head' but when what's in your head happens to disrupts your sleep schedule and prevent you from going outside regularly and eating consistent meals and exercising and generally taking care of your body. well it sure takes its toll huh.

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The problem with being low support needs is that people mentally autocorrect that to “no support needs” and then proceed to give you absolutely nothing and then get surprised when you implode after six months.
i’m so glad goncharov happened pre ai slop era
#weird way to describe 1973 but i guess it’s accurate
She's being so big and brave.
We need more female characters who channel exhausted single father who is just doing his best. Do you understand what I mean.
She's kind of a loser in a charming, but also in a pathetic way. Wears the same jacket she's owned for 10 years. Really good at some random uncool hobby like darts or scrabble. Terrible at meal prep. Reheats her coffee three times before drinking it. Tries to keep up with slang, but never gets it quite right. Little kids love her, teenagers think she is mega cringe. Hasn't had enough sleep in 6 months.
Julien + comforting Occtis
CRITICAL ROLE 4.31 Trick of the Light

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So I just simultaneously did, and possibly didn't lose my job today :)
Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.
So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.
But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.
It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?
So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:
Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.
And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.
So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".
So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.
I don't know what else to say aside from I've been laughing all day and I'm gonna have a hell of a time explaining Schrodinger's Unemployment to the benefits office.
Update that is not an update because I'm basically certain this isn't what actually happened:
My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.
Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.
Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.
Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).
Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues
(also shout out to the person who proposed Carmen Sandiego)
ACTUAL (partial) UPDATE:
According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.
Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.
For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.
So now I'm officially out of a job. Because my workplace was literally stolen in the night.
Actually fuck it let's share some photos cause I wouldn't be inclined to believe this myself. It's not like anyone can stalk me at my job now and I'm not gonna have to see any coworkers that might find my tumblr.
Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life
Aaand a close-up:
The last remains of a once Very Much Solid And Immobile Workplace
HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE
via @kagaminilen
[cut to a kiosk on legs, sipping a boba, while wandering into the nearest forest on chicken legs]
Here you go @a-bit-too-dyscrasic
today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring
Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?
we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation
So after extensive interrogation I have an update:
my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.
the truth is actually weirder
she’s aware dandelions look like this
she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions
she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?
she answered, with complete confidence: Daffodils.
gosh I enjoy this website
For comparison, this is a daffodil
See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.
i don’t think so? i’m southern and buttercups are what we call these things (much tinier)
Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???
This is an Easter Lily. It is an actual lily and therefore deadly to cats.
They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!
This is a marigold:
….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u
“buttercups” is a name applied to MANY flowers. in my part of the south it was this one:
imo there’s correct identifications of dandelions, daffodils, easter lilies and marigolds in this thread, but buttercups are simply impossible to agree on and the only solution is for everyone to post pictures of their local buttercups
*squints* is that a motherfucking EVENING PRIMROSE?!??
Hello I would like to add to the confusion:
That purple fella is a Morning Glory as told by my mothers (texan)
⬆️ morning glory
wait so if thats morning glory what is this?
*Puts hand over gaud’s mouth* It’s a butterfly pea. Please ignore the Latin name.
*licks ur palm* i won’t be silenced THE PEOPLE HAVE TO KNOW
anti abortion propaganda that tries to like scare you into feeling guilty by reminding you that the fetus has body parts are so funny. "uwu please don't abort me I have eyes at 4 weeks old 🥺" nice try sucker I don't care if you see it coming
“They said they wanted a vampire relationship with no age gap”
“No age gap??!?!?”
“And no non-con elements”
“NO NON CON?”
“And no coercion or otherwise manipulative behaviors”
“Joe they want a vampire with NOTHING”
You can’t call yourself a leftist if you hate children tbh, like you can choose not to have them or be around them, but outright hating the most marginalised group of people in the world who have absolutely no power or control over the most basic parts of their lives and bodies is a dangerous mentality to have and you need to grow the fuck up and get out of your edgy phase and start treating everyone around you like human beings, even the ones that piss you off.
Like the older I get, the more empathy I have for children. Imagine living on this planet for less than a decade and having to figure out every single thing from scratch, only for the people around you to treat you like a living doll and constantly invalidate your feelings because you haven’t learned how to express them beyond screaming at the top of your lungs, like you’d be having meltdowns in the grocery store as well. The least you can do is offer them some grace, everything is so fucking confusing and scary and overwhelming and they’re not able to communicate that properly and no one around them is explaining shit, and they are constantly at the mercy of whether or not the terrifyingly giant adults around them CHOOSE to be kind like genuinely put yourself in the situation of a child and tell me you wouldn’t also be freaking the fuck out.
The way society treats children is borderline inhumane, and you have the audacity to call them hellspawn crotch-goblins for screaming a little bit too loud or daring to be in the same vicinity as you.
I do also believe that hating children is a sign of underlying ableism, because most of the justifications of hating children comes down to “they’re annoying” or “they don’t know how to act” or “they’re gross” and if you are unable to treat people who lack social skills, who make loud or repetitive noises, who are incontinent etc. with basic respect and dignity, then what’s the difference between hating children and hating disabled adults that share the traits you find so irritating?

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WE'RE SO BACK
So to review:
*Primus' planned attack on the Palazzo Davinos fails to kill Aranessa Royce or Sir Julien.
*Plan to ritually sacrifice Occtis to create the Deva Vinidicta doesn't work for a whole host of self-inflicted reasons.
*Due to the above, Primus gets called a fool by his dead father.
*Despite the claims that House Royce is 'withered' the attack on the Golden Orchard results in Tachonis forces being slaughtered and the only reason it wasn't a total loss is because Aranessa wasn't there to keep the Orchard's magic stable.
*During said attack, Primus' eldest son gets cursed to do the Hokey Pokey for the rest of his life.
*The attempt to cover up the Palazzo massacre is so bad that everyone who thinks for more than 2 seconds figures out something is up and an official investigation gets launched.
*Primus' 2nd/3rd eldest son (whose name is Frons) decides to put on armor he doesn't know how to fight in and gets himself thrown off a bridge by the man Primus failed to kill.
*Petra and Ryah are attracted to Wicander because he was mean to his sister.
*Petra and Ryah have killed their previous fiancees because they want to be in a throuple. This has happened often enough that they were stripped of being their father's heir.
*Otto Einfasen insults House Tachonis' entire aesthetic in front of the heads of the other Sundered Houses and servants.
*After being put through the 3rd degree by House Einfasen, Primus whines to Yanessa that the entire family is broke and can't afford to bribe the other Houses to forgive them.
All of this happened in less than a month.