RusticPumpkin

It would be a lie if I said I hadn't been keeping my phone in hand waiting, wanting to get a text or call from Paul that It didn’t look like I was going to get considering it was nearly 7 in the evening and still not a sound. I had put the number he gave me before when we first met into my contacts list so I would know it was him calling. I was sitting there trying to convince myself not to call him. That he would call me if he wanted to.

And he did want to right?

Stop it.

Don’t be stupid and overreact you know EXACTLY what he’s doing.

He will get ahold of you when he has time.

… one text to see if everything's ok won't hurt though…

I sent it before I had time to talk myself out of it. Just a sweet and simple.

-is everything ok? ~Kat

I sat there for a solid 10 minutes with nothing so I just sighed and turned back to watching ghost adventures reruns.

Was it stupid that I felt like this? Why in the hell do I miss him so much?

About an hour later I was half asleep and bundled in an oversized fleece blanket and somehow the cold was still able to creep in and keep me barely awake. I was startled when my phone vibrated in my hand.

-Yeah everything's fine, do you have plans tonight?

I smiled at the message snuggling deeper into the blanket before replying that I didn’t have plans and I was even surprised myself when I asked if he wanted to chill and watch tv or something.

-Definitely, I’ll be there soon.

After I got that message I kind of realized the situation I’d put myself into. Paul’s coming over, I invited him over for what pretty much sounded like Netflix and chill. That wasn’t him being an overbearing asshole that was ME offering. Me?! I’d never asked any guy to do anything but here I was freaking out and tripping up the stairs to the bathroom.

I don’t think I’ve ever showered that quick in my life, I didn’t know I could wash my hair, body and shave in under 10 minutes but I sure as hell did! It took me longer to put on lotion and pick out what I wanted to wear than it took me to shower. Like it really mattered. I was sitting there trying to decide between track shorts and leggings with a tank top or an oversized t-shirt.

I heard my phone ringing downstairs and that made the choice for me Shorts and oversized t-shirt it is then. I hurried downstairs to answer the phone it was Paul who was calling me. “Hey sorry I was upstairs.” I apologized before he had time to speak.

“You’re fine, I just wanted to stop and grab some pizzas. What kind do you like?” He asked. “I’m not really a picky eater Charlie always grabs whatever the special is that day and I’ve never not liked anything if you're talking about the pizza place downtown in forks.” I shrugged.

“Yeah, alright you want something to drink?” He asked. “You don’t have to go out and buy anything we have a pop here.” I offered. “Yeah because I want Charlie on my ass for drinking his pop, he’s already giving me a hard time about you.” He scoffed jokingly but I paused for a second Charlie is a cop. What if he doesn’t like the idea that I’m under 18, is it really a good idea for Paul to be over here?

“A hard time?” I asked the concern evident in my voice because he reacted quickly tripping over his words. “No not like that, he just picks at me with the others. If he really had a problem I’m sure you would know about it.” He muttered before I heard him talking in the background to order the pizza. “I’ll be there in like 20 minutes.” He said. “Alright, see you.” I sighed before ending the call.

I couldn’t shake it though. I mean in less than 2 months I’ll be 18 so I’m able to make my own choices but I AM technically still a minor and Charlie IS a cop. I don’t want him to think that he has to do anything about it… I mean Paul and I aren’t even a thing really. I just like him a lot, no matter how stupid that may be. As long as he’s not lying he likes me too and when two people like each other things can happen.

It's not like I haven’t been thinking about it, I mean I’ve been thinking about a lot of things that I’ve never really thought about before. Now I felt bad for thinking those thoughts at all… a little.

Part of me (probably the hormonal teen part) didn’t give a shit. A very large portion of my just wanted to make out with Paul. The other more reasonable part knew that wasn’t really the best idea… not yet anyway.

It didn’t make sense, I want to be smart and not get hurt. I don’t really know him and the first ‘date’ we had was a fucking disaster! It was horrible I spent the night in jail! I didn’t even do anything! Here I was not even thinking about anything like that and just being excited about him coming over.

God I’m so dumb.

I jumped at the knock on the door even though it was around the time Paul said he was going to be here. I answered it to a soaked to the bone Paul using his coat to shield a stack of Pizza boxes and holding a bag of two leters that I took from him and lead him inside.

His hair was down covering his eyes and the shirt he had on clung to him like a second skin. It revealed all of the muscles that I remembered seeing on the night I met them.

“Sorry.” He said being the first one to speak. “For what?” I scoffed as he flipped his hair back splashing me with the rainwater and making me laugh. “Taking so long, but we’ve got to catch whatever out there.” He sighed as I walked past him towards the steps. “going to grab you a towel and some sweatpants you’ve got to be freezing.” I said before he had the chance to ask me where I was going.

“So why did you buy 5 Pizzas?” I asked as he came back from getting changed I was right in thinking that my old sweatpants would fit him fine and he looked much more comfortable in those than those wet clothes that now tumbled in the dryer.

“I wanted to make sure Charlie had something to eat when he got home.” He said sitting on the couch next to me and pulled the stack close to him and flipped open the top box. “Are those pickles?” I asked looking at the pizza as he picked up as still hot looking slice his face clearly excited. “I asked for the special, it was Bacon cheeseburger.” He said before taking a bite as I reached over and picked up a piece for myself.

“They didn’t even use pizza sauce.” I scoffed not that it tasted bad, it actually tasted very good the sauce was a mix of what tasted like ketchup, mustard and mayo. They had hidden chunks of ground beef, onion, tomatoes and bacon under a thick layer of cheese it was literally a bacon cheeseburger in pizza form.

It was fucking delicious and genius. “Charlie would love this.” I said through a mouthful of food Paul nodded in agreement as we sat there and pigged out on pizza. I got up and poured us each a glass of the pop that Paul had bought and put the rest in the fridge. I came back to the living room to see him opening the second box of pizza eagerly before literally scarfing a piece down in a bite and a half.

“Are you even tasting it? Jeeze slows down no ones going to take it from you.” I scoffed handing him his cup for him to turn it up and down it at once. “Sorry I’m just a big eater.” He said before burping obnoxiously loudly and I couldn’t help but laugh as I reached for another piece of pizza myself and scooting back into the couch.

“So have you guys found out whats killing those people?” I asked he just shrugged not looking at me. “We know what it is just haven’t found it yet. Bastards fast.” He muttered through a mouthful of food before getting up and grabbing the whole 2 letter from the fridge.

“What it is? Charlie thought it was a serial killer or something, I told him it was probably aliens.” I said making him laugh as he took a large gulp so that he almost spat it out of his nose but he was able to stop himself only to bust out laughing so hard that he fell off the couch.

I was kind of in awe if that made sense, even though I was laughing at something about his laughter made me so happy. “It wasn’t that funny, it could be an alien you know.” I said faking offense. “Well I mean I guess.” He cried whipping off his eyes and seemingly making himself comfortable leaning his back against the couch.

“You know you never told me where you’re from.” He said, yeah way to change the subject Paul. “I’m from Florida, but don’t change the subject what do you think it is?” I asked. “Woah, Florida like northern Florida or like Orlando and stuff?” He asked completely ignoring the question and not looking at me. “In between.” I said. “So like did you go to universal and Disney all the time?” He asked a lot more interested than he should be about some theme parks. “A few times but they’re way too expensive and I was too fat to ride the rides. Now stop avoiding the question what do you think is killing those hikers?” I asked annoyed with his avoidance.

“Well, I know exactly what doing it but I’m not really allowed to say but that’s beside the point what do you mean you couldn’t ride the rides?!” He answered and avoided the question at the same time. “What why aren’t you allowed to say?” I asked confused. “I mean they are open investigations not really allowed to say.” He shrugged suddenly way too interested in the commercial that was playing at the moment.

“Charlie had no problems talking to me about it last night, and you know how uptight he is with the rules at work.” I said. “Yeah and he’s the police chief. I’ll get into trouble if you find out whats doing it.” He said phrasing the words weirdly and doing nothing but making me more curious. “So you know it's not a person.” I said thoughtfully. “Kat.” He sighed whining a little at my attempt to guess.

“Because it’s a fucking alien and the government won't let you tell me.” I said faking suspicion. “Totally.” He smirked rolling his eyes. “So what does Charlie have you do? Are you like actually hunting this thing down or just looking for more victims?” I asked. “We hope we can get him, but more often than not we end up finding another person.” He sighed sounding almost deflated at the fact and I mean I’m not a part of that so I don’t understand how he would feel. Looking for a bad guy and only finding more innocent bystanders in pieces probably would be disheartening.

“Its got to be hard on the dogs being out in rain like this looking.” I sighed and Paul looked at me confused and terrified.

“What?” He asked his voice cracking slightly. “The dogs, Charlie said that you guys had dogs out looking.” I said confused as to why he acted so weird about it.

“Oh yeah… those dogs…”  he said nodding. “You don’t have a dog? He said that’s why you were helping.” I said confused because someone was lying about it. “Uh who me? No, I um, I don’t have a dog… Sam, he- he has a dog.” Paul stuttered horribly threw the explanation and I didn’t buy a word of it.

My face clearly said so too. “Kujo loves running around outside don’t worry about him.” He said waiving the conversation away. “So what you guys just go out in the woods looking for this thing?” I asked confused.

“Yes? Were really good a hunting, tracking that sort of thing. We’ve come close a couple of times to catch it.” He said making more sense than he did before. “Oh, well why would Charlie make a big deal about one dog?” I scoffed still not quite getting it.

“Yeah, why he would mention anything like that is beyond me.” Paul sighed…

“So whats the east coast like?” Paul asked about an hour later as we sat on the couch cross-legged facing each other knee to knee. We’d been playing 20 questions. Up until now it had just been stupid things like favorite colors, he was blue. Favorite bands, he loves classic rock AC/DC is his favorite with a close tie to Lynard Skynard and Metallica. Favorite foods, he loves quick easy things to make and take out because he doesn’t really know how to cook. Silly little things but it was fun and I enjoyed getting to learn the little things about him.

“The town where I’m from is very old and historic so rich old white people make sure things are as uppity as possible.” I scoffed rolling my eyes. “I mean it's nice but not as relaxed if that makes sense.” I said he nodded as I thought of the question I wanted to ask him.

“If you could go anywhere but here where would you want to go?” I asked. He looked a little confused by the question. “Would it be too cheesy if I said where ever you go?” He scoffed and I nodded rolling my eyes but unable to keep the smile off of my face. “I mean I like it here, this place is my home.” He shrugged. “My people are here.” He added. And that made sense. “A trip to LA sounds fun or maybe someplace cool like new Orleans or something.” He shrugged. I looked at him expectantly because it was my turn to ask a question.

“Why did you come to our little peninsula?” He asked. I paused not really thinking that he would ask something like that but I had to answer. “Uh my family- they uh. There was a car accident and um Charlie was the only person I have left.” I said struggling to not get to the point of where I break down, tonights going too well for me to ruin it with something stupid like that.

“Oh sorry for bringing it-.” He started to apologize. “Don’t be Paul really, it's not like I broadcast it for people to know.” I said forcing a smile. “Still leave it to me to kill the good vibes.” He sighed rubbing the back of his head gripping the hair there. “I need a haircut.” He muttered to himself and I thanked him for changing the subject.

“It's not that long.” I scoffed reaching forward and running my hands through the mop on his head dark straight thick hair that reached a little past his ears. “but it gets too hot when I’m working.” He mumbled and seeming to relax towards where I was running my hand through the front of his hair smoothing it back out of his face.

“I could cut it for you.” I offered knowing Charlie had a pair of clippers in the bathroom upstairs with all the guards in them. “You can cut hair?” He asked. “I always used to cut my brothers and all of his friends hair. I’m pretty good at it.” I scoffed. “Sure.” He said standing up and offering me a hand. “Right now?” I scoffed. “Why not it's not like we're really watching this show anyway.” He shrugged and he wasn’t entirely wrong.

So about 10 minutes later he was sitting in a chair in the kitchen a couple of towels over his shoulders as I sorted through the kit. “So what am I doing? Just taking it all off?” I asked. “Whatever you want.” He offered. “It's your hair, not mine.” I said pointedly as I tied my hair up in a bun on the top of my head. “Yeah but you’re the one who has to look at it so do whatever you want to it.” He said.

“The only thing I can do besides a fade is an undercut.” I mumbled. “An undercut it is then!” He said enthusiastically.

“What do you think?” I asked holding my phone up for him to use it as a mirror. “Dude!” He exclaimed surprised and pleased as he turned his face side to side examining his hair. “I told you I knew how to.” I said as I started sweeping up the mess of hair on the floor. “I mean this is really good!” He said happily running his hand over his scalp.

After cleaning up and putting everything away we made our way back to the living room and were both messing around on our phones sitting shoulder to shoulder. I started watching random videos on youtube mostly DIY Halloween decorations only because one was on my recommended feed and then it spiraled into the both of us watching the videos commenting every once in a while about one we thought was cool or stupid with his chin resting on my shoulder to easily see my phone screen.

It was so natural it was weird. Like we’d done this hundred of times thousands and this was another normal night it was so relaxed. He would move with me when I needed to get more comfortable leaning on me a little more each time not that I minded the weight, he was warm and despite all the muscles he was soft and made of cuddle material.

“Come on, I’ll give you a ride back to Charlies.” He offered flicking the lights on top of his car off. Something was wrong though. It was his eyes they were way to striking to bright for it being so dark outside and inside the cruiser.

He made me uncomfortable.

Him looking at me made me want to puke, scream and run away.

This person terrified me and I didn’t want to be anywhere near him.

“No thank you.” I said loud enough for him to hear me and started walking again. “Oh come on, the chief finds out I let you walk back in this it’s my ass!” He said indignantly. “I’ll tell him I said no.” I said as he drove his car next to me as I walked. “You don’t even know where you’re going!” He argued.

“LOOK, I DON’T FUCKING KNOW YOU!” I shouted at him and his eyebrows were raised confused why I was screaming at him probably but I was sick of guys thinking that they could tell me what to do or guilt me into doing anything.

He just looked at me for a second before he flipped on his lights again and this time the siren wailed so loudly so close it made me cover my ears. Before I even had time to realize what was going on he was pulling my wrist behind my back and cuffing them there.

“WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!” I snapped struggling away from him but his iron-tight grip made it so that if I tried too hard I would end up breaking my wrists. “Don’t add resisting arrest to your citation Swan.” He teased opening the back door of the car for me to get in.

I just looked at him dumbfounded before getting into the car.

…

“Un-fucking-believable.” I growled seeing Charlie walk into the station as I sat still handcuffed on a rather uncomfortable chair in front of the desk that belonged to Emmett Cullen Deputy of Clallam County and apparently Bella’s brother-in-law. Who decided to arrest me for being a minor out after curfew when a state of the emergency situation was at hand.

“What in the hells going on?!” Charlie asked walking up to Emmett who leaned back in his office chair smirking at me. “Found her walking down towards the exit to 101 from the dinner.” Emmett said. “Smells like a dog to by the way boss.” He added strangely making me smell the front of my hoodie, I didn’t smell like a dog, fucking rude.

“Kat I told you that it’s dangerous to be out like that what were you thinking?!” Charlie asked more worried than angry, his tone made me roll my eyes. “I was thinking that I fancied a walk.” I said in a smart ass tone.

“At 11 at night in the pouring rain?!” He snapped and I shrugged. “Normal forks weather from what I understand.” I was just being an ass.

…

“How in the hell did that happen?” Charlie asked the next morning when he caught a glimpse at my wrist. It was bruised all the way around and I couldn’t tell if it was from Paul or that cop but it was obvious that it was a hand print.

“Ask your deputy.” I growled rolling my eyes pissed that he’d taken his side last night and had me stay in holding to ‘teach me a lesson’ now it was 10 am and I’d just gotten a shower and changed out of the ugly faded green inmate clothes they’d given me last night.

“Emmett’s never bruised anyone before, the boy knows his own strength.” Charlie defined him. “He's a fucking weirdo, just like everyone else in this god damn town!” I argued.

“Now kat,” “Don’t now Kat me like your my dad or something Charlie. I’m fucking out of here as soon as I have money for a plane ticket back to St. Augustine. This place is nothing but a bunch of crazy ass men- you included.” I snarled tossing the plate I had in my hand so hard into the sink that it broke on contact.

“Kathryn Ann!” Charlie snapped at me his voice authoritarian and angry. “Charles Ray!” I mocked right back at him my voice matching his own.

“It's no fucking wonder Bella wanted to leave this place!” I snapped before stomping past him making sure to hit him with my shoulder a lot harder than needed as I climbed the stairs 2 at a time to get away from him.

The next time I left my room was because today was my first day of work, Charlie was silent and waiting for me in the car because I’d asked him to take me via text. When he refused to acknowledge me offering him gas money for the 10-minute drive I just smacked it on the dash and slammed the door of the truck before walking into the small gas station.

…

It was simple enough work, clean, interact with customers as much as they interact with you and do whatever you want in sometimes hours between people.

The busiest times were around 6 am when people were on the way to work, around 6 pm when they were on the way home and then again at 10 pm for the second shifters getting back into town.

Most of the customers were people around town, some of the natives from LaPush, it wasn’t hard to get to recognize faces and names. Within a week I had most of their cigarette brands memorized and how much gas they would get every day.

It didn’t take that long for me to figure out that Casey the guy who’d given me the application and I later found out begged his grampa to hire me, was a total fucking creep. ‘Accidentally’ touching me and things like that, constantly asking me out only for me to not-so-kindly decline him every single time.

He would be shitty about it for 4 minutes before trying again. It wasn’t hard to understand why females never lasted long here with this dude ‘managing’ things.

The only good thing about it was we only really saw each other for about an hour a day and I only had to put up with him for so long before he had to leave or I did when we were switching shifts. I personally preferred nights because of how dead it was but mornings were ok too.

Sometimes Sam or Embery and Quill would stop by on their ways to work. I was surprised when they never said a word about Paul though.

Every time I even thought about him my stomach would be in knots and I would have to put a sign on the door letting customers know that I was on break and I would be back in a moment. I would try to puke but my body would never let me. I could spend hours in the bathroom curled up in a ball but I didn’t have that kind of time and I didn’t want to waste any on him.

That was until the second I walked out of the back and saw him standing in front of the counter looking through his wallet. I walked up to the register and got it ready for his order not saying a word.

He looked like shit, if that were possible. He looked like he’s lost weight, his clothes were disheveled and didn’t look like he cared if he put on something clean or not. He smelled like booze from where I was standing behind the counter. His eyes had dark circles under them and they looked so, so tired.

His appearance enough made me want to apologize but I didn’t, I refused to, I did nothing wrong.

That thought was thrown out the window when he looked up and saw me standing there though. His eyes wide in surprise and his mouth open slightly as he moved back from the counter half a step like he didn’t know if he wanted to run and go somewhere else or not.

“Kat.” He said finally after a few seconds, when he blinked tears were clearly threatening to wet his face as he looked away from me. “Hey Paul.” I greeted him quietly.

He bought a pack of cigarettes when I didn’t even know that he smoked. “That’s bad for you, ya know.” I said attempting to joke with him as I slid the pack across the counter towards him. “I can stop, if you want me to.” He said quickly, making me laugh and shake my head. “I was only joking.” I said as he handed me his money.

It felt silly but I also made sure to touch his hand as I gave him back his change. He was just as warm as ever. It made me regret the week that I’ve been pretending that he didn’t exist. It made me feel like a complete bitch for being so rude to Charlie this week too when all he wanted to do was make sure I was safe. At the same time his skin made me feel like everything was going to be ok. It made me hopeful that things would be ok.

They had to be.

“You on your way to work?” I asked him as his receipt printed and he nodded shoving the coins in his pocket and putting the bills in his wallet.

I picked up a pen and flipped the receipt over doing something that was probably stupid. I didn’t think so though, and the way his face lit up when I scrawled my number down on the slip of paper before handing it to him. “Call me after work or something.” I said before adding. “If you don’t hate me after-.” “I could never hate you Kat.” He straight up interrupted me and made me blush embarrassingly brightly.

“Then call me, maybe we can hang out or something.” I said unable to meet his eyes because of how he was beaming at me.

That smile could kill me where I stood.

“Let's avoid any ex’s though huh?” I joked and he nodded when his phone rang in his pocket an alarm probably because he cussed when he looked down at it as he walked backward towards the door.

“We could have a movie night, or I could take you to the beach or, OH there's a drive in about an hour away we could go see something….” He said quickly it was completely different than the way he walked into this place. He didn’t look sick anymore maybe a little messy but that was it. “Just call me, we’ll figure something out.” I said waving him away because his alarm started going off again. He nodded and straight jogged out to his truck.

I pretended not to see him shouting happily once inside.

…

I’d planned on apologizing to Charlie when he picked me up that afternoon. But it wasn’t his truck that pulled up it was a police cruiser with that stupid weirdo deputy in it.

“Wheres my uncle?” I growled as he rolled his window down smiling at me cheerfully. “He’s busy at the moment and I’ve been charged with taking you back home.” He said patting the seat next to him.

“Or we can do this the same way as last time.” He offered in the way to cheerful tone. God I can't place it but I didn’t like this guy.

Despite that fact I got into the passenger side.

The drive was awkward and uncomfortable the only thing that broke the silence was the dispatcher over the CB radio.

“I’m not trying to give you any advice but I would be nicer to the old man than you have been.” Emmett said pointedly.

“That’s literally advice.” I scoffed. “I’m just saying, the dude cares a lot more than he lets on and you’ve been here like what 2 weeks? Let him worry Bells just kinda dumped him over Edward and he didn’t really get the chance to be a dad for all that long.” He said.

“Speaking of her where is she?” I asked he shrugged. “Somewhere in South Africa.” He said. “They travel a lot, they want Nessy to see the world and learn everything there is to learn.” He said referring to Bella’s adopted daughter.

“Alice thinks she's going to be home soon though, something to do with you.” He muttered in a weird way. That I didn’t really think much of, this dude a fucking weirdo anyway.

He dropped me off in front of the house after that and I walked into it being the exact same, as always.

….

“What are you doing up so late?” Charlie asked as he passed where I had been asleep at the kitchen table waiting on him to get home Paul never called me but I figured he was busy something told me he wouldn’t have missed the opportunity by choice.

“Waiting on you to get back.” I yawned stretching.

“What for?” He asked pulling a beer from the fridge. Charlie only drank when he’s had a hard day and to say he looked ragged was an understatement.

“To apologize for winning first prize in the worlds biggest asshole contest.” I answered jokingly. He raised an eyebrow at me as he sat down at the table opposite me. “seriously?” He asked like he really didn’t believe me at all. “Yeah, I mean never ever take that yellow-eyed freaks side over mine again but I’m sorry for saying the stuff I said before.” I shrugged.

“What do you have against Cullins?” He asked almost amused by it. “Whats not to hate? Weird eyes, i-can-do-what-I-want attitude and the dude looks like he’s never heard about a spray tan.” I scoffed.

“He’s a good kid, weird yes but he’d never hurt a fly.” Charlie said making me roll my eyes. “Which is why I played nice with him when he was sent to fetch me.” I said nodding but when he moved I spotted something on the dark sleeve of his padded coat.

“Dude is that blood?!” I hissed flipping on the small dim overhead light. He looked at his sleeve and sighed tiredly standing up with heavy movements. “Yes, this needs to go to evidence.” He muttered whipping his eyes to clear them the guy was super tired that was clear.

“Here, I’ll drive you out there, I’ve been wanting to drive the cruiser.” I chuckled standing to he nodded gratefully.

“So how did you get that on your coat anyway?” I asked as he sat in the passenger seat of his police cruiser with the coat folded neatly on his lap.

“We found another hiker today.” He sighed woefully. “She was torn to shreds, whatever it is isn’t even killing them for food, it's just killing them for the hell of it.” He said rubbing his temples. “Another one?” I asked confused I’d never even heard about more after the hunters he’d told me about weeks ago.

“Yeah, its why Emmett took you in, all females, all light brown to blonde hair. At first there wasn’t really a target or a real like identifier just brutal killings now we're starting to think we have a serial killer on our hands.” He said that made me think as my throat tightened.

A killer on the loose killing girls who look like me, a great way to spend the rest of the summer.

“In a small town like this?” I asked still not really understanding. “Besides didn’t you say that she was torn to shreds? Human killers can't really do that can they?” I asked he looked at me confused and a little worried. “Come on I love true crime shows killers usually use knives and guns but an m.o. like this one doesn’t sound right. A human couldn’t physically rip someone to shreds.” I said pointedly.

“That’s true.” He muttered looking out the window like he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. “Still, I don’t think that a mountain lion would have a vendetta about girls with light hair.” I added pushing for information. “Maybe it targets someone who targeted it before.” He said not making any sense. Mountian lions don’t really form grudges like that.

“If it was a mountain lion don’t you think you would have found it by now?” I asked. “Normally but this one is really crafty.” He said in a tone that said drop it.

“Charlie hear me out for a moment.” I said getting his attention with the seriousness of my voice. “You’ve heard of the cow abductions and mutilations in Texas right?” I asked seriously earning a look from him that either I was super close to what he was thinking or making myself look crazy.

“Think about it Charlie it makes sense right they’re targeting certain types of people and then they’re gone without a trace by the time someone finds the bodies.” I urged.

“You think… that aliens are killing these girls?” He asked like I was the one who was insane.“I've watched enough ufo documentaries to know an alien abduction when I hear about it!” I implored.

“I might consider it if it weren’t for, A aliens aren’t real, B Aliens don’t exist and C I need to block the travel channel because you watch too much tv.” He said rolling his eyes.

“Come on Charlie are the dogs even getting any scents?” I asked he looked at me then in a way that was almost concerning on my end. He looked accusingly at me, like I said something that I had no way of knowing. “You have like police dogs right, search and find ones?” I asked and he still looked at me but he seemed to calm down as I pulled into the parking lot of the police station.

“Yeah, and I uh… have the boys from La push running with them.” He said as if that was connected in any way or even made sense. The old guy must really be tired. After that the ride was mostly quiet, he asked about work and I told him how creepy my coworker was and how I’d finally spoken to Paul. He told me it was his fault that I hadn’t gotten a call. Paul was helping with the ‘manhunt’ and was pretty busy with it.

That thought along with all of the not so subtle sideways glances he’d been shooting at me was enough to make my face about 3 shades redder.

"This is it right?" He asked pulling to a stop in front of Charlie's place house, our home. I nodded moving to unbuckle my seat belt.

"Hey Kat." He said getting my attention as he put the truck into park making me glance over at him as I reached for the door handle.

"Yeah?" I asked a little wearily.

"Are you single?" He asked the question so blatantly it made me replay it in my mind in case I wasn't hearing it right.

"Uh, Yeah, I am but you do realize that we met like 5 hours ago right?" I scoffed rolling my eyes threw the blush at the face that formed on my face. He looked like I’d just ran over his dog or kicked his grandmother or something like that, completely deflated. For some messed up reason I felt bad about it too.

"Thanks for the ride Paul." I sighed opening the door and nearly having to jump to get out of his truck.

…

I decided to move my bedroom around again, my mind clinging to everything that happened today, all the looks and things like that. I’d never really had a guy look at me like that before.

Hell even the guy at the gas station didn’t try to hide the way he looked me up and down.

I didn’t know how much I liked it, less than 6 months ago I was the ass end of a very bad prank where I was a joke date to the prom. The guy was stunning, nothing like Paul or any of the Quileute boys.

He’d fooled me into actually thinking he had feelings for me, I’d made my parents go out and pay for this stupidly expensive dress for him and his friends to ruin it by dumping punch all over me. I’d already spent the night thinking that he’d stood me up, then he and his friends had to add insult to injury and make it a point that he would never go out with a fatass like me.

Like I was.

I stopped looking in the mirror of my closet door lifting my shirt and looking at my stomach if I looked at it from the right side I looked… good. Not too skinny, not to fat there were a few stretch marks and I was pail on my tummy but I wasn’t as bad as I was right? I don’t look bad enough to do that again right?

I started physically hurting, my mind going to places it had no right going. Worrying about things that didn’t make sense. I shouldn’t be worried about never seeing Paul again, he's a 20-minute drive away. I had a thousand other things to worry about at this moment but here I was having an emotional freaking break down over the possibility of this being just another fucking joke.

I didn’t even take the time to change out of my clothes, take the shower I wanted or crawl under the comforter before I went to sleep.

…

I drug my feet as I sauntered downstairs at around 1 in the afternoon my hair still a mess and in my PJ's. "Late night?" Charlie scoffed at my appearance.

"Yeah." I grumbled walking to the fridge.

"Already turning heads are you?" He asked as I sat at the table with all the things I needed to make a sandwich. I glanced up at him confused.

"Paul Lahote came by this morning on his way to work, dropped off the stuff you left in his truck last night." He said eyeing me like he caught me doing something wrong. "It's not like that.” I shrugged as I started making my food.

"You should have seen the look on his face when I told him you weren't out of bed yet." He scoffed making my face warm up again bringing back the events of the night before and the feelings that came with them.

Charlie sighed standing up making me notice that he was still in his work uniform. "I only came home for lunch, pizza sounds good for dinner?" He asked sounding tired.

"Yeah, are you ok?" I said kind of concerned with how tired he seemed. Wanting to take the focus off of myself just for a bit at least.

"Animal attacks happening again, it’s been a few years but this time we're gonna find them." He said like he was trying to assure me.

"Animal attacks?" I asked.

"Yeah some kind of mountain lion or something, don't worry about it. Just stay out of the woods." He sighed before he walked out the door.

I saw my bag and hoodie sitting on the couch. I sat down turning on the TV and getting into my bag for my phone, I honestly can't believe that I didn't notice that it was missing last night.

I just scrolled through my news feed for a while listening to the travel channel drone on about aliens getting bored quickly. I pulled out my sketchbook flipping to the next clean page thinking that drawing would help clear my mind. Seeing scrawled on a fresh page in heavy-handed letters a phone number and Pauls name with a note that said 'call me' Making my face instantly heat up and a pit form in the bottom of my stomach at the same time.

The whole situation just seemed like it would be best if I just left it alone and didn't bother. That way I won't get hurt if it is a prank. Besides Paul could do so much better than me, according to the way he looks he probably has done better than me. So even if this isn’t a prank, I’m doing him a favor leaving him alone.

…

I didn’t recognize the number that called me but it was a local one with a Forks area code. So I answered it and to my honest surprise it was the gas station that I’d applied at yesterday, I wasn't expecting a response at all to be honest let alone one so quick.

The older gentleman asked a few questions over the phone and asked me if I would be interested in the job. Of course I was, I wanted money to start saving up for a car of my own. I didn’t want Charlie getting the idea that he should use the money to buy me one.

He also explained that the payment was under the table so I would get paid with a personal check every week that he told me I could cash at a local grocery store. The great thing is that it was more than minimum wage and I would be working alone after training.

I was given Tuesday as a start date and like that I had a job.

I scoffed to my self after the phone call looking at the receiver as another feeling crept into my stomach. The guy didn’t ask many personal questions about work history or education anything like that and I had a feeling that the guy from the night before with wondering eyes, pushed them to hire me anyway. It made me a little sick but he was going to school soon so I wouldn’t have to deal with him forever.

…

My thoughts were broken when someone knocked on the door behind me. I thought that Charlie must have ordered the pizza already which confused me because he watched me eat like 2 sandwiches like an hour ago. I grabbed my wallet and walked over to the door anyway preparing to pay the pizza guy.

But it wasn't the pizza guy at the door, it wasn't the pizza guy at all.

Unless Pauls job was to deliver pizza in which he failed because he didn't have any pizza inside. However for some reason, the pressure that I felt on my shoulders and the pit in my stomach lessened instantly at just seeing him standing there in a red flannel and jeans. He’d obviously even taken the time to slick back his dark hair.

"Hey." He smiled at me, my fuzzy mind still wasn’t working right. The only thing I wanted to do was hug him and it made absolutely no sense at all.  

"Hey, Paul." I mumbled absentmindedly moving to tuck some flyaway hair behind my ear.

I almost lost my shit when I realized my hair was tied up and he could clearly see the scars on my head and face. My smile dropped and I turned that side of my face away from him.

"I um, brought your stuff back." He said, sounding nervous probably completely regretting the choice to come back and see me again. Why else would he be nervous around someone who looks like me?

"Thanks, Charlie told me." I muttered absent-mindedly folding my arms over my chest.

"I have another question." He said sounding like he was doing his best to sound confident, even though the last time he asked a question it didn’t go so well for him. 

Please, don't ask about my scars.

"Hm?" I asked still not looking at him. "Are you busy?" He asked confusing me making me look up at him.

Does he not see my face? Can he not tell that I'm not the type of girl that he would want to take anywhere? When I made eye contact he glanced down at his boots patiently waiting for my answer.

"Because if you want I was wondering if you would let me take you to dinner." He continued a little shakily said obviously this guy was blind or thinks I’m a complete idiot.

"Why?" I asked wanting to know what he was playing at. Did he think I was that much of a fool?

"Well, last night I was kind of upfront and really fucking creepy. I thought you would like it better if you got to know me first. I know this really good place on the edge of town, best burgers on the peninsula. I was hoping you would let me take you out." He said really quickly his nerves apparent it made me blush for no reason what so ever.

"Paul, are you blind or do you think I’m stupid?" I scoffed he looked at me his eyebrows arching in confusion.

"Uh, no actually I have pretty good eyesight. And you’ve never given me the I’m a fucking dumbass vibe, why?” He said confused.

"So you're just going to ignore my face then?" I asked pointedly.

"No... I don't get what you're asking, or why." He said sounding so hopelessly confused that I almost laughed at him.

"I'm not the type of person someone like you should be seen with." I scathed moving to shut the door but he held up a hand stopping me from doing so and looking at me confused.

"Why?" He asked sounding desperate to know.

"What do you mean why? Dude, look at my face. I'm pretty sure that you can get plenty of other girls who are more on your level." I said my voice dripping with venom because more and more it was looking like another prank at my expense.

"I honestly don't know what you're talking about 'on my level'. I get it I was weird before but I’m being honest when I say I wanna take you out. If you don’t now that’s fine, I can wait until your cooler with it or whatever." He said pointedly in an almost forceful tone that quite frankly caught me off guard. This guy really was going gung-ho about this whole dinner thing.

"Look, dude, I'm skating by at a weak 4 and your a solid 11 out of 10." I said making him scoff at me. I watched as the color darkened on his cheeks as he shuffled his feet.

Did I just make this dude blush?

"Well whoever told you that is wrong." He said. "I don't need anyone to tell me anything, I can look in the mirror you know." I retorted sharply getting annoyed that he was making me actually think he was being serious about all this.

"Well, you're wrong." He said simply. 

Oh that smooth, cheeky, bastard.

I couldn't even think about a valid come back from that comment and my face just kept getting warmer and warmer.

"Has anyone ever told you how cute you are when you're frustrated? but anyway about that dinner." He said smirking triumphantly at me.

"And what if I say no?" I asked raising my eyebrows at him a matter of factly.

"Then I go home cry about it for about 3 hours, drink myself to sleep and then try again tomorrow." He said as smoothly as if he had it already planned out but he continued. "And the next day, and the next day and then if its still no then I will try the day after that. Then If its still no I might take a break for one day where I sit in my bathtub, waisted out of my mind contemplating what aspects of my life I would need to change to get you to go to dinner with me." He rambled on jokingly earning a short laugh and a 1/2 hidden smile from me.

"Come on Kat, what could it hurt?" He asked continuing on with the joke.

"A lot more than you think, you’ve still not really given me an answer as to why. Every girl in town already heard your pick up lines?" I chatted having no doubt in my mind that Paul was a player. He just looked like he could have any female he wanted sitting at his beckon call, why he was wasting time on me I couldn’t tell you.

"Normally, I don't even have to bother asking if they're single or not." He shrugged bitting his lip and winking at me like that was supposed to make me feel better.

"Uh-huh... maybe I should keep playing hard to get then. Since, that's the only reason I have your attention apparently." I said raising my eyebrows at him threateningly and kind of feeling empowered by the look of horror that washed over his face momentarily making me actually laugh.

"Come on, please, I’m begging here." He whined in a fake begging tone. I sighed glancing outside behind him it was a gloomy day perfect for a hoodie and jeans.

"I guess." I muttered not wanting to admit that he was getting to me. The way his face brightened up told me that he didn't hear my apprehensive tone.

"Stay right here I'll be down in 5 minutes." I said before leaving him at the door.

Within 3 minutes, I was internally screaming at myself as I attempted to tame my hair that was wild and poofy from me not brushing it after my shower this morning.

There is absolutely no way I'm going to have it managed in 5 minutes. I gave up, braiding it back loosely enough to hide my scar and getting dressed in jeans a t-shirt and a hoodie.

I wasn't expecting the dazed look on his face when I walked downstairs he stood right at the door where I left him.

"Are we going or?" I asked walking up to the doorway pulling my bag over my shoulder he hadn't moved at all.

"Yeah, sorry." He said. He was acting like a gentleman the whole time, opening the door and everything it felt like it was a bit much. Forced, and that made me nervous about the whole situation. I could tell he was still nervous especially the way he kept fixing his hair or checking to make sure his shirt was still buttoned.

The ride was silent and again somehow he was able to get to my door and open it before I had the chance to myself.

"Dude, were at a burger place, not some fancy restaurant." I scoffed as he closed the door behind me. "I just want everything to be perfect." He said quietly. Putting a hand on my shoulder and leading me inside as it started sprinkling.

I was on edge, just waiting for someone to jump out and tell me I’ve been punked or something. But by the seconds that his hand was on my shoulder the feeling was melting away and it was nearly all gone when we sat at a booth and he instantly reached for my hands.

God why is his hand so warm? And, why am I comfortable with him touching my hands like this?

I can't explain it at all, the way he was making me feel. Comfortable? At ease? Like we’ve done this a million times and it was just another Saturday night.

“You see this?” He asked as he examined my palm trailing his finger along a line there a smile playing on the corner of his mouth that I couldn’t read as his dark eyes flicked up to mine.

If I didn’t know better I would think that his breath caught just the same as mine as I watched in the fluorescent lights his pupils blow out almost completely covering his chocolate colored irises. I almost didn’t get the chance to make out the flecks that were the color of brown sugar before they were flattened around pupils.  

“Yeah.” I breathed completely lost in his eyes. A small part in the back of my mind somewhere was freaking out about the kind of look he was giving me. A look that was so… intense that it didn’t make sense it made me feel comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time. Like I wanted to see that look on his face every time I saw him it was so in love.

In love and he’s known me for about 24 hours. How stupid is that? Why does the idea make me feel so warm and content? So at ease about this completely unrealistic situation that would no undoubtedly be swept out from under my feet at any second.

Sometimes I hate how right I am.

"Paul?!" a voice chimed gaining the attention that he had been giving to me so easily that it smacked me back to reality a lot quicker than it should have. I pulled my hands away from his and back into my lap on my side of the booth where they should have been to begin with.  

It made me want to smack the shit out of the pretty waitress that walked up to the table. She was the Barbie doll kind of perfect I dreamt about being when I was little. Perfect blonde hair, bright blue eyes, and a figure that put mine to shame.

Even her smile was flawless as she beamed at Paul, making me want to just disappear into the seat and never, ever admit that I thought for a bit that I had his attention. It was a stupid idea.

I glanced at Paul even though I knew better, I knew it would sting if he was looking at her thinking the same things I was and those thoughts would be clear on his expressive face.

It wasn’t him looking at her like he had been me though. Confusion was one thing on his face, annoyance was another. The waitress whose name was Tiffany according to the nametag on the front of her apron.

"Since when do you work here?" Paul asked the annoyance from his face in his voice, it was sharp and cut me to the bone even if it wasn’t directed at me. Tiffany didn’t act like it bothered her one bit as she shrugged saying something like last week or something like that trying to start a conversation by asking why it been so long since he’s been here.

I just looked down at the table while he ordered his food from memory the way she giggled while writing everything down made me feel like some sort of awkward 3rd wheel. She just made a comment about how she should know exactly what he wants with how often they ate here and the worthless feeling that I had before was starting to change into something else.

The confidence I felt just seconds ago was still there surprisingly and I had to fight not to tell her to go away and leave us alone, but that wasn’t my place. I didn’t know her enough to be as angry as I was at her right then.

"And what does side piece of the week want?” It was the first thing that she said directed at me. I was still processing what she’d said wondering if she really just decided to talk to me like that when Paul spoke.

“What in the fuck is wrong with you?! You can't just fucking talk to her like that Tif WERE CUSTOMERS.” Paul snarled at her as I stood and walked past her.

“Oh no, I’ve hurt her feelings, poor thing should know better.” Tiffany sneered, loud enough for me, and everyone else on this side of the dinner to hear clearly. “Besides what is she like 15? Not like you to go for the young one's baby.” She added as I pushed past the door and out into the rain.

“Kat!” I heard Paul shouting over the fat cold raindrops as I walked towards the edge of the parking lot. I’d decided about 4 yards ago that I wasn’t going anywhere with him.

HOW IN THE HELL WAS I SO STUPID?!

“Babe comes on, don’t b-.” He started as he caught up to me. I whipped around faster than he could finish stabbing him in the chest with my finger. “Don’t you fucking dare call me that!” I hissed before continuing on walking.

“Kat, please, I didn’t know she worked here!” He said grabbing my arm yanking me to a stop and to be honest it hurt but I wasn’t about to let him know that I just ripped it out of his grip glaring up at him. “Would it matter?!” I snapped. “Would it honestly matter where we went because I would be willing to bet that anywhere between here and fucking port Angles we would be running into someone that wasn’t supposed to be there!” I shouted at him. Not really knowing where all of the anger was coming from but it was here and the more he tried to get me to stay and talk the worse it got.

“Just stop and listen to me for a second, it's not like that!” He said clearly getting angry himself. “Fuck off, Paul. Leave me alone!” I shouted still and again he grabbed my wrist twisting it as he pulled me back to face him but the second that he saw my face he let go of my arm.

“I’m sorry!” He gasped as I turned on my heel again and started walking towards what I hoped was home, I still don’t really care as long as it was away from him.

“No, Kat I- I didn’t mean to, please just let me explain what happened back there and then I can drive you home or we can grab drive threw whatever you want!” He begged getting in front of me and I just sidestepped him. “What I want is for you to leave me the hell alone! I don’t know what in the hell made me think for a fucking second that you were actually interested in anything other than getting laid.” I scathed not looking at him.

“You thought that because that’s not what I want, I mean eventually but not right now, not ever if you don’t want just give me the chance to-.” “The chance to what Paul? The chance to make me look and feel like the biggest fucking fool on earth? Or the chance for me to actually fucking believe you before you find a new side chick for the week?” I snarled.

“The chance to show you that’s not how it is!” He shouted back at me. “What do you mean that’s not how it is Paul? YOU MET ME YESTERDAY!” we were both just screaming back and forth at each other at this point. It hurt.

It hurt a lot more than it should looking at him right now.

The way he looked halfway between exploding and breaking down crying at the same time.

“It was fucking mental. Psychotic. Completely unrealistic that you would be this upset about someone you just met yesterday. Do you not understand that Paul. Do you understand why just from this right here I should never fucking talk to you again?!” I shouted at him and he froze the anger that had taken over some of his features drained and his face paled even in the dim street lights.

“Well do you?” I asked because his face made me feel like a fucking monster for saying something like that too him.

I saw his lip quivering as he breathed deeply before answering the most mournful “Yes.” I’d ever heard in my life and it almost made me want to apologize… almost.

“I’m glad we're on the same page then.” I hissed before turning away from him and continuing through the rain.

I walked for a few yards expecting and half wanting him to follow after me but he wasn’t there, he wasn’t even on the road back towards where his truck was parked, like he just disappeared. I was left alone on the forested road with nothing but a few streetlamps that did nothing but make the forest around me look more ominous.

The howl that I heard way too close made me jump even if it sounded sad. The fact that Charlie had told me that there were killer mountain lions out in the trees made me want to sprint back to Pauls truck but I refused to. I hated the fact that I wanted to go back to where he was to feel safe.

It was stupid.

This date was stupid.

I look like I haven't slept in weeks and it was almost 90 degrees out so i was going to be miserable wearing this hoodie. But I can't just go walking around showing my scars like that, I was going to meet new people and old friends, to stop acting like some hermit who lives in Charlie's house.

I needed to look approachable at least and the makeup wasn't working, not that it really ever has before. I just used the wash rag to clean off my face and attempted to smile at myself, I wasn't convinced so no one else was going to be either.

I just had to do this, if for nothing else to make Charlie happy.

I walked out of the house dressed in the only pair of jeans that weren't too big for me, a black T-shirt and a maroon zip-up hoodie. I made sure that I had my sketchbook and headphones in my shoulder bag so that if I needed to go and be out of the way I could.

"You are going to burn up in that hoodie." Charlie said shaking his head from side to side as I climbed into the passenger side of his old red pick-up truck.

"I am a cold-bodied person." I shrugged which isn't a lie but he was completely right, it was way too hot out to be wearing this. "If it gets to be too much I’ll just take it off." I sighed reaching for the controls on the radio. 

...

We stopped at a little gas station right next to the sign that labeled separation between Quileute nation territory and Forks that also pointed the way to Port Angeles.

When I say this place was small, I mean that the interior was the size of the truck, there was enough room for a register counter, a drink cooler, a coffee and fountain pop machine, and a small rack of chips among other small things.

It looked like a place that hadn’t been updated since the 70’s or 80’s and according to the pumps it wasn’t wrong. Charlie offered to buy me a fountain pop I just had to go in and pay for the gas and a bag of ice and I had free reign with the rest of the change a whopping 5 dollars.

I walked in and up to the counter there was a guy around my age maybe a little older leaning over it playing on his phone not paying attention to anything else. I had to clear my throat to get him to look up at me.

“You’re new.” He said looking at me like he’d never seen anyone with a red hoodie on before but after a moment I realized he was staring at my chest and I closed the half-open fabric to cover up myself a little more. “Yeah, can I just get 10 on pump 2, a big bag of ice and a fountain pop.” I said putting the 20.00 bill on the counter.

As he was getting the gas set up he glanced out the window seeing Charlie at the pump waiting for the go ahead. “The police chief?” He scoffed confusing me with the way he was talking. “No offense but weird crap like that is the reason why I’m moving out of this place as soon as fucking possible.” He said before I realized what he was insinuating as he handed me the cash.

“He’s my uncle.” I said lowly and the dude who wasn’t even wearing a name tag or anything close to a uniform looked like a deer in headlights stumbling over a quick apology. “Why would you even assume something like that?” I asked really wanting to know as I eyed the sign that said “JOIN OUR TEAM” taped to the counter.

“Well keep in mind. I graduated with a family that was all doing the do with each other. They were adopted or whatever but still siblings that’s gross.” He said making a disgusted face that I kind of agree with that was pretty weird. “Yeah, I guess.” I shrugged pointing at the sign. “Do I need to be 18?” I asked.

He shook his head from side to side. “Pops doesn’t really care as long as your not doing anything stupid, we don’t have room to sell booze and nothings reported its all under the table but he’s great with holidays and overtime compensation.” He rambled as if he’s said it 100’s of times. “He needs to find a replacement for me. I start school in a month.” He explained.

“Online?” I asked talking note of the place and the guy actually laughed. “He refuses to get a cordless phone at home and uses the iPad I got him for Christmas as a coaster.”

He reached under the counter and handed me a 2-page paper application that was stapled together.  “Cool, thanks.” I muttered before going to grab my pop.

“You thinking about working here?” Charlie asked. I shrugged. “They're the only place hiring,” I sighed pulling out a pen from my bag and starting to fill out the application as he pumped gas and grabbed the ice I dropped the application back off on the counter the guy was in the back and I didn’t wait long enough for him to come back to the front.

…

I walked behind Charlie as he parked the truck on the sand and lead me towards a 3 person group that stood around the grill, the smell of wonderfully cooking meat filling the air and reminding me of my lack of eating breakfast this morning.

"So he was able to drag you out of the house?" a voice asked to the side. I looked over seeing an older man with long black hair that I recognized immediately as Billy Black, my childhood crush.

Every kid has that one adult in their life that they plan on marrying when they get older and for me that person was Billy Black.

"Billy!" I said ignoring the fact that Charlie was attempting to introduce me to a couple that stood in front of us.

I ran over to hug the old man around his neck nearly knocking him back off of his chair, that I didn't remember him having but it didn't matter. There would always be a soft spot in my heart for Billy. He laughed and patted my back as I finally let him breathe. "Its been too long Kat." He sighed patting my shoulder I nodded in agreement taking in all of the changes on his face.

"She already found you?" Charlie scoffed walking up to us. "How could I not, remember the time that I forced him to marry me?" I scoffed my arm around Billy's shoulders squeezing happily. "Yeah, you broke poor Jacobs heart," Charlie said rolling his eyes.

"Who is doing it this time?" a voice sighed from behind us. I chuckled as someone I had sure as hell never seen in my life walked into view.

"Jake, You remember my niece Kat right?" Charlie asked patting my shoulder. The dude that looked to be nearly 6 and a half feet tall, with short black hair, russet skin, and more muscles than a Calvin Klein magazine.

"There is no way that's Baby-face-Jake Black." I scoffed making him glance at me as if confused as to who he was looking at as well.

"Kat? As in the girl who said she would rather kiss a piece of beach wood than me?" He asked raising his eyebrows and making me laugh genuinely for the first time in months. He walked up to give me a big bear hug picking me off of the ground and swinging me side to side pulling another fit of laughter from me. He was…. Hot? Like in both senses of the word, he felt like he was running a fever of well over 100 degrees but I was assuming he’d just been running or something.

"Still true btw." I scoffed playfully punching his chest testing whether or not it was as solid as it looked, which it was. What I’d said was a total lie but it was worth it to get him to laugh that smile could light up a whole room. It was hard to believe that he was only a few months older than me he looked like a fully fledged adult.

"God you grew up." I sighed stepping back from him. "Yeah, so did you." he said looking me up and down making me roll my eyes. What is with dudes today?

"IS THAT WHO I THINK IT IS!?" a voice that I did recognize as Quills rang through the air I didn't have time to turn around before I was almost tackled to the ground by him and Embry. They were both a lot bigger too, not as big as Jake but still, they were all huge compared to the boys from Florida I was used to seeing.  

"Alright, Paul's about to start a game of soccer anyone who wants to play head over to the beach!" the man who Charlie had at first started to introduce me to called over the ruckus of their greeting.

"Kat you should totally play!" Embry said excitedly both Jake and Quill nodding in agreement.

"I don't think so." I scoffed glancing over to the guy on the beach who was laughing with a few others bouncing a soccer ball from knee to knee like he’s a pro or something. "I don’t really feel like losing, my competitiveness is worse than it was before. And there's no chance in hell I’d stand a chance" I said rolling my eyes all of them looked like they were on some kind of steroids and I didn’t even think I remembered how the game worked.

"They've all grown up." I sighed watching after them as they jogged as a group towards the beach.

"That's one word for it." Billy scoffed looking at the one who had been manning the grill as he and a woman who had to be his wife walked up to us. "Sam Uley." He introduced himself by offering me a hand that I accepted. "Kat." I said nodding before offering my hand to the female who looked like she hadn't expected the attention. Her hand had been over her extremely swollen belly, she looked more than ready to give birth. Glowing and miserable at the same time it would have been amusing if she didn’t look really uncomfortable at the moment.

Another thing that immediately caught my eye was that she was like me, she had scars too.

"This is Emily, my wife." Sam introduced us and she shook my hand I realized that I had been staring at her scars and I attempted to make a silent pass at the fact that it wasn't because I was judging anyone. So i moved the hair that had been covering my ear and jaw behind my shoulder revealing scars of my own.

The small smile on her face as she glanced at her husband and back at me said she understood and the smile grew as she pulled me into an unwanted hug that I didn’t fight as her belly pressed into my own awkwardly.

......

They were all idiots except for Sam and Emily.

It wasn't a false deduction, considering the fact that the boys decided to start acting stupid with fireworks shooting them at each other. It started out as the normal stupid reckless boy stuff like bottle rockets and roman candles, individual black cats and even a few cherry bombs. But they soon took it up a notch and started throwing larger, more explosive fireworks at each other passing them back and forth like hackysacks as they went off the one who ended up with them as they exploded was ‘out’. It did look like they were having a blast.

"How do you deal with this all the time?" I asked shaking my head to Emily as I helped her set out plates and other dishes from her home in preparation to call everyone to the meal. The delicious smell of grilling foods made my stomach ache in hunger reminding me that the sun was setting and I’d had nothing but a pop today.

She scoffed at the loaded question. "They rarely get to let loose like this so it's nice to see everyone getting along for once." She sighed glancing at them. "They are a handful and will eat you out of house and home but I wouldn't trade it for the world." She sighed dreamily I smiled at her happiness they were clearly like a family all of them.

I missed the feeling.

I found myself getting in the way more than I helped. More and more food started piling onto the table after fixing myself another cup of pop I went to sit down by the huge bonfire on a driftwood log turned into a comfortable seat. I pulled out my sketchbook preparing to draw the horizon and the rock figures that interrupted it.

"KAT WATCH OUT!" I heard Jake call behind me. whipping my head around as a firework whizzed in my direction as well as one of his friends who had been closer to me. His arms went around my waist quickly pulling me out of the way making both of us fall to the ground.

His chest cushioned my fall as his head bounced off of the soft sand and my cup of pop was crushed between us getting both of us soaked.

I glanced up at him and he looked at me wide-eyed as the firework zoomed past us into the fire and caused a color full explosion. I was shielded from it by him rolling us away from the fire and putting his back to the bright sparks instead.

"A-are you ok?" He asked breathlessly as I opened my eyes to find his peering into mine again.

I wasn't shocked by the whole fireworks situation I was shocked by the guy who was still laying half on top of me in the sand when he didn't need to be. Looking at me like I was the most beautiful person he’d ever seen. His dark eyes made to look almost golden in the flickers from the still popping and whizzing from the firecracker going off.

Guys like this don't exist in real life, and if they do somewhere in the world they sure as hell don't look at me like he is.

"F-fine." I managed to say realizing that I had my hand on his chest he was warm like Jake had been. My stick pop covered hand didn’t seem to want to move from its place on his sternum until I forced it to.

After I spoke a smile that bumped Jakes down to second place broke out on his face and I was dazed by it. A smile like that needs a warning.

"Sorry." I muttered for no apparent reason as he stood to offer a hand to help me up that I accepted, his hands were calloused and so much bigger than mine it was laughable.  

"That was my fault, I didn't think that Jarod would miss my pass like that." Jake apologized along with another guy as they all jogged up to us.

"Well next fucking time pay attention!" The guy who still for some reason held my hand snarled at him through clenched teeth. That completely threw me off guard this prince charming fairy tail guy even being able to sound so angry.

"Its cool, work on the butterfingers Jarod." I scoffed pulling my hand out of his and tossed the now empty broken cup into the fire.

My hoodie was soaked with soda making me internally scream and just hiss in frustration for the rest of them to hear.

"I'm sorry." The guy who saved me said like it was his fault that he saved me from a stray firework. He was something else with the expression he wore it was complete and nonfiltered self-disappointment and that threw me for a confused loop.

"It’s all good." I sighed lying to myself because this meant I had to take off the thing so it could dry. Leaving the scars on my arm exposed, for everyone to see and it made me feel a little sick on top of the fact that this guy looked like he hated himself for getting pop on my hoodie.

"FOOD!" Emily called getting my attention and everyone else's thankful.

Well, everyone except this guys. I seemed to have all that.

I quickly made sure that my hair covered up my scars on my face to make sure that he couldn't see before I realized that it wouldn't matter in about 5 seconds.

"Are you sure you're ok? I landed on you pretty hard." He asked again his hand going to my neck, directly on top of the scars there. It would have been a normal gesture to someone who you were close to, but we weren’t close. I didn’t even know his name and the fact that he thought it was ok to touch me, especially on a place that it would have been clear that I was trying to hide a second ago.

"I said I'm fine." I said a sharp edge to my voice as I swatted his way too warm hand away. "Here, you can use this just make sure that it will dry out." I said pulling off my hoodie and tossing it to him to use as a makeshift towel.  I didn't wait on him, I jogged over to the table where people were whispering assumedly about me because when I took my seat in between Billy and Jake they stopped talking but they didn’t hide the looks they were giving me. It was weird, they all had these goofy smiles on their faces that I couldn’t read.

"Where's Charlie?" I asked noticing that he wasn't at the table or around anywhere.

"He got called into work, I was told you can stay over or we can find you a ride home." Billy said I nodded and looked a Jake. "You have a car right?" I asked him he looked down almost like I opened a wound that wasn’t fully healed. "The transmission went out on it but I-."

"I can give you a ride." the guy said making it to the table and sitting directly across from me his expression way too hopeful, for what I didn’t understand. "Cool, thanks.” I muttered before reaching for a burger prompting everyone else to start digging into the food.

He kept looking at me, he was definitely staring because every time I glanced in his direction his eyes were on me. When I caught him he would jump into a conversation that was going on around us about sports, which I knew nothing about so I didn't partake. I mostly talked to Bill about how Charlies been. How I’m doing, of course without all of the dramatic bad parts.

"Kat, what do you do for fun nowadays? I can't imagine you still go around pretending to be a monster or beating up unsuspecting little kids." Quill asked laughing, his mouth still full of food as he pointed out how I would never let them think that just because I was a girl I couldn’t stand up to them.

"Draw, listen to music too loud, the usual angsty teen stuff." I said sarcastically.

"You draw?! Can you draw something right now?" He asked earning a smack in the back of the head from Sam making me laugh at the way his food flew out of his mouth.

"You'll have to show us sometime." The one who kept staring at me piped up making my face go warm again, what was it with him?! Cant he just acts a little less like a fucking weirdo? I don't get why he keeps doing this to me. And I get the fact that I am actually liking the attention even less.

"Yeah I'm sure Paul would love to have an excuse to set close to you." a guy my age named Seth sneered teasingly earning teasing laughs and jears from the others. “Of fuck off, I’m just being nice! Isn't that what I’m always told to work on?!” He snapped again his face turning from normal and relaxed to defensive and angry as he glared at the younger male.

Anger problems much? I scoffed in my head but I also was stuck on the fact that I now knew his name.

Paul.

I couldn’t make myself stop thinking about it when he decided to sit next to me in the sand. We were in front of the log that I used for a backrest as we all gathered for so Billy could tell us old ghost stories. He spoke about the tribe's legends that actually intrigued me, they were about humans who could turn in to animals to protect their loved ones.

I've always been obsessed with the paranormal and since what happened that fascination has multiplied to an almost unhealthy extent since what happened to my family.

After the stories trailed off and people started making their way home Jake paused looking at where I sat tossing shells and rocks that I found in the sand into the fire.

"The couch is still open." He offered to glance at Paul who seemed to be snoozing in the sand less than a foot away from me his arms behind his head as a makeshift pillow.

"I'll wake him up, I need to grab a shower and I would much rather sleep in my own bed." I yawned.

"He worked this morning probably why he's so tired." Jake sighed shaking his head at Paul in a way that I couldn't read.

"Hey, Paul, wake up." I said nudging his leg with my shoe and he jumped up looking around until he saw me making Jake laugh at the way he was asking.

"Can I still get that ride?" I asked him. He nodded stretching his shoulders, his thick muscular arms above his head while he yawned loudly. "I think we're good, thanks Jake. See you around." I said waiving goodnight to Jake before standing up and putting my sketchbook back in my bag and my hoodie over my shoulder.

"I'm parked over by the front of Sams house." Paul said motioning me to follow him.

It still rains too much, making everything seem dismal even in the house that had dim lights that were probably older than me. I scoffed at the thought because I knew that couldn’t be true… about all of the bulbs in the house anyway.

There were old photos on the wall that seemed to have been recently dusted of Bella, Aunt Renee, and Uncle Charlie hung up probably years and years ago before Rene left and went somewhere sunny. Somewhere like where I came from. Even the bright smiles in most of the photos that I still remembered from my childhood weren’t enough to make the room any lighter but maybe that was just me… it’s been hard lately.  

"Bellas old room?" I sighed as Charlie walked in behind me having some issues with the suitcase he offered to carry for me, it was mostly clothes, a few art supplies but the size of it and the muddy ground that he didn’t want it to touch was what made it difficult.

He nodded out of breath, "I'm goin to order a pizza the drive back took longer than I thought it would." He said sitting the luggage down so I could grab the handle and wheel it towards the stairs.

I nodded pizza sounded good, something quick and easy that doesn’t make awkward dinner table conversations obligatory. "Is there anything that you won't eat?" He asked I could tell that this change was going to be awkward for him, but he was trying harder than he wanted me to realize. So I decided that I'm going to try to make this whole situation as easy as possible, for both of us.

"Not really, sardines but if you want them I can just pick them off." I shrugged as he handed me my other duffel bag and I started up the stairs. "No one eats sardines and enjoys it." He said trying to make a joke and I laughed at it, even though it sucked.

"In the morning we can run out and get things that you might need if you want." He offered. "I'm not a morning person." I muttered shrugging before continuing, "But thanks for the offer, I think I'm good. If I figure anything that I really need I'll let you know." I assured him, he nodded seeming to understand that I just wanted to go to bed and I was thankful for that.

Bella's old room is smaller than the one I had back at home. like everything in this house from the magnates on the fridge to the boots lined on the wall by the front door, everything in here was in the same place too.

I was too tired to think about rearranging anything tonight, I just dropped my bags on the bare bed and pulled out a pair of sweats and a tank top so that i could go do that thing that over the past few months I've grown to hate.

It’s not that I actually dislike showering but I hate the 'avoid the mirror' game. I had to do it because I would get sick every time I saw myself and what I've been reduced to.

While I was in the hospital and the aftermath of the accident, I've lost almost 50 pounds. I was, to be honest at a healthy weight for my height, the greatest shape I've been in in my life. But the way my once vivid icy grey eyes that I once prided myself on as being my best feature were now dim and gaunt, I had dark circles under them, from a mixture of sleepless and nightmare filled nights. I looked just as sick as I felt when I saw the rest of my skin.

The scars were the worst part, they were what made me really want to not look. They made me hate my own skin but being dragged behind a flipped car on the asphalt for about 50 feet will do that too someone. It could definitely be worse, I could be dead too.

Without even realizing it I was doing it again, staring. That's how I know its hard for other people not to, if I cant not look how can I expect anyone else to?

They ranged from a little over 2 inches wide on my left arm and leg to about 10 inches wide on my side and hip, thick slightly raised scars going down the left side of my body. My head wasn't even untouched, most of my left ear is gone. I have a scar going down my jaw and even light places on my cheek the 'lucky' part about those is that they were light, so makeup would help but nothing would ever take them all the way away. Unless I wanted to get surgery which considering how long I spent at the hospital before meant it wasn’t going to happen for a long time, if at all.

My tawny brown hair was the only thing that really hasn't changed all that much. There was a small patch around my ear that no longer grew and a portion around my ear that had to be buzzed off so I could get staples to hold my scalp shut. My hair looked just as dreary as my eyes it made me look unhealthy but being unhealthy meant I was still alive.

I was lucky

After my shower, I knew the pizza was probably here but I was too tired to care about the rumbling in my stomach at this point. I walked to what was now my room across the hall and lay down on the bed. I had every intention of getting up and going to find a pillow and blanket for myself from the hall closet but I was asleep before I had the chance.

…

I sat a week later, at the kitchen table sipping my coffee and scrolling through my social media feed. Even with me gone all of my friends were still able to function as proper 18-year-olds. Having fun and going to parties without me like it wasn't any different. I'm not going to lie and say that it doesn't hurt that I haven't even gotten any text messages telling me how much they miss me or to check in on me but it is what it is. Things outside of this place change and this is just one of them.

I don't expect to have ‘friends’ until I start working which I don't know how long that's going to be. There are only a few family own businesses in this little town and none of them are hiring right now anyway.

Charlie says that I don't need to worry about working or a job but I do. I don't want to be a financial burden on him after the insurance money stops. If I had been 18 before all this, I wouldn't even have had to move in with him period.

Charlie's been nothing but supportive. In his own awkward way, Bella thinks that its because he's happy that he's not living alone anymore. But I still kinda get the ‘I’m going to be super nice because of the hard time you’ve been having’ vibe off of him.

Speaking of Bella, I haven't got to see her yet. She's went with her own family on a trip to Africa… I think anyway I can't say 100% that I remember what she told me.

My whole life here has been nothing but a haze considering the nightmares have only gotten worse with the change of scenery. More vivid and realistic but it helps me wake up sooner I guess so there's that. I know that Charlie is concerned about them but there's nothing that I can do short of not sleeping at all. Which is what I do if I can help it even if that bothers him too.

"I thought you weren't a morning person." Charlie said walking in and confusing me because I thought he had left for work earlier but he was dressed in a flannel and jeans instead of his police uniform. Thinking about it, since I’ve been here I don’t remember ever seeing him in anything else, it was weird like seeing a teacher in public or something.  

"Couldn't sleep." I muttered shrugging.

"Do you have any plans for today?" He asked knowing full well that I didn't. He just wanted to know if it was ok with me if I got out of the house, which I have yet to do, in a polite way.

"No, whats up?" I asked not looking up from my phone a stale meme looking really interesting all of a sudden.

"A friend of mine is having a barbeque out on the beach in La Push.” He said referring to the Native American reservation that was a 20-minute drive away from here.

"Sounds fun, I love seeing old dudes cook on a grill and argue about football," I said sarcastically rolling my eyes.

"Fireworks and a bonfire, there will be other kids around your age there." He said as if attempting to sell me on the idea, he wasn’t doing a good job, kids my age are assholes. "You remember Jacob Black?" He asked me the name did ring a bell. "I think so," I said remembering a lanky copper skinned boy with pants that were never quite long enough for him but he was always shorter than me. "The kid that you and Bella used to play with." He added attempting to jog my memory.

"That skinny kid?" I scoffed making him bark out a laugh. "Yeah, he's not little anymore." He sighed in a way that made it sound like Jake had gained weight. "Quill and Embry live out there still too?" I asked remembering them too, we’d all been in our own little pack, fighting imaginary sea monsters at the beach (Mostly just clumps of seaweeds that had washed up from high tide).