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@runesinthenight

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God I want like. A full body massage. A team of dermatologists acting like an f1 pit crew to destroy my bad skin issues. 3 days in a jacuzzi. Another full body massage. Put onto a medieval torture rack and stretched until it fixes me idk I feel like it'd do wonders for my hips
i enjoy that every single human’s reaction to penguin is unrestrained delight
And penguins lack large terrestrial predators, so their reaction to humans tends to be, “HELLO STRANGE GIANT PENGUINS, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? DO YOU HAVE ANY FISH?”
I will reblog this on my deathbed.
Please let him science 🐧
i think at least half of the million reblabs on this are from me
There is an international treaty that says we’re supposed to stay 6m away from penguins, and it’s really difficult because no one told the penguins, and they all desperately want to wander up and say hi.
Im so tired but I finished this ✨️
sticker design for pride this year! 💞🏳️⚧️

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Ribbon dancing I was not aware of your evolution 🤯
This is hands down the most stunningly graceful acrobatic performances I have ever seen in my LIFE but I did unfortunately have to restart the video because of this one move she does that is a dead ringer for the time my grandpa lit off a blue angel and shot a fireball at the couch 😭
i just love all the stories about production on project hail mary. they didn't use a single green/blue screen in the whole film. they built the whole interior of the hail mary. the petrova line scene was done practically by putting infrared lights on a chicken wire cage. rocky's voice was one of the puppeteers because he did such a good job during filming that they couldn't imagine anyone else voicing him. and rocky was a practical puppet/animatronic! sandra huller picked sign of the times as her karaoke song and she asked her daughter if it was still a cool song. i just feel like there was so much love making this film and im obsessed
Turns out you can roll a 7 on a d6
but only once.
good morning to the beaten and the damned only
dude, this is really scary, and liminal as well. It's like the bathrooms

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do you have the "my, what a cool and lovely autumn poem" perchance
[ID of poem within tweet, translated by eileen chengyin chow @ chowleen:
少年不識愁滋味 愛上層樓 愛上層樓 為赋新詞強說愁
而今識盡愁滋味 欲說還休 欲說還休 卻道天凉好個秋 - Xin Qiji 辛棄疾 (1140-1207)
In youth I knew nothing of the taste of sorrow I liked to climb high towers, I liked to climb high towers To conjure up a bit of sorrow to make new verse.
Now I know only too well the taste of sorrow. I begin to speak yet pause, I begin to speak yet pause And say instead, "My, what a cool and lovely autumn." ]
Rocky meets Eva Stratt, what could go wrong ❤️
Can’t get this on any other social media
bat opens up their little bat wallet to find they are all out of moths. A worthless $100 bill flies out for emphasis
From top-of-frame, a month flutters into the wallet. Confused, the bat looks "up" to see an equally-confused human standing "above" her, holding an open wallet containing a single $100 bill.
Camera rotates to reveal bat has been hanging upside down above a human doing the exact same visual gag and each ruined the other's bit.
Laugh track.
All so true. Why is the human Jon Arbuckle
(meme rewrite courtesy of @stardreamerl0ve)
(based on this post)

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Little life advice:
Everyone who says not to set your stove clock or microwave clock because you won't use them and don't look at them anyway is lying.
Set them.
Because sometimes, you will come come from a week away when no one was in your home, and see the stove and microwave clocks blinking and go, "Oh shit, the power went out while I was gone, even though it's clearly back, which means every single thing in my fridge and freezer might have gotten room temperature and refrozen, and will give me food poisoning."
And it will be the only indication whatsoever not to eat it.
Anyway, just got back from the grocery store, but at least I don't have botulism.
I know this is a 'better safe than sorry' kind of scenario, but if you like me live in a place where power often goes off for a few minutes due to power grid failures in summer with all the A/C units going in the neighborhood, it's not going to help.
Put a glass full of water in the freezer. I use a shot glass to save space. Once the water is frozen, put a coin on top.
If when you're back the coin is under the ice, you know your shit has defrosted and should be thrown out.
hey so can somebody please do something about all of this