i'm not lex bookworm

my five year plan? read a lot of books. visit museums. walk through woods. stand in a river. adopt a little kitty. drink lemonade while sitting in a rocking chair on my porch.

americans are a saudi oil baron's idea of classy. brits are an american's idea of classy. the french are a brit's idea of classy. unfortunately the chain ends here since the french's idea of classy is also the french

I get that sex and drugs are fun but even im like. at least have a 3rd thing. at least one more hobby. you can have a 3rd hobby. this isnt a purity thing this is a some of u are fucking boring thing.

my niples

sore

Inventing a new literary archetype called the gyro's journey where it is about getting scrumpt because you are a yummy sandwich

Times are hard at the cafe so they only got Something bagels

as a feminist i think girls should suck each other’s tits more

people aren't addicted to coffee because of the caffeine they're addicted to coffee because of the pooping

the position of the mischevious pig marks the hours

fuuuck I could use a mysterious benefactor right now