i see stars and go weak

stop drinking beer with the deer and come have a cider with the spiderrrr

i say make antique stores more narrow and cramped #evil

you are alive on a planet with insects and whales and diatoms and mycelium networks and puppies and your human friends. literally so awesome to be a living thing

There's a weird 3 star movie out there ready to change your life forever

so awesome how there's an animal called a gooey duck & it's spelled geoduck for some reason & it's a humongous clam for some reason

“Who yells?” Is unquestionably the best broad city line i think about it every time someone raises their voice even slightly

need a polite way to say "im not engaging in a discussion on this topic with you because the conclusions you have reached are based on so many interwoven layers of misconceptions it would be easier to just like, hard reset your whole brain, just start over as a baby and try again"

love when hot women in their thirties are blogging with me. like that’s the hottest thing we can do.

much like a beautiful horse i like salt and roaming freely

Polycules should be able to trade people like sports teams do

Listen -- you're a good defender and your pussy is fantastic, but that's not what our team needs right now. We're trading you to Greater Boston in exchange for someone who has a car.