party rock

so i think the solution is to give dachshunds a third pair of legs right in the middle

im so tired i could sleep a horse

if your animal is lying on the floor, furniture etc, it’s important to take a picture of them. then, if they move or shift in any way, it’s important to take another picture. with this technique, you can take many pictures of your animal

Wait! I can change! *grotesquely transforms into a snarling ghoul*

hey.. two people were asking about you… so i gave them your address and phone number… their names were Skeletal Warrior and Skeletal Ice Mage

Why are you telling me this? It seems like they wanted it to be a surprise

therapypilled deadbeat father: I really don't have the headspace for custody right now

At the end of my rope and it keeps getting longer like some sort of clown handkerchief bit?

mozzarella and parmesan is kind of like the age gap yuri of cheese