Revel inside dark paradise

I am very sick of the notion that codependents are empathetic people. Codependents are extremely narcissistic in terms of their goals and behaviors. (Narcissistic, not saying they all have NPD, though some of them certainly do.) You are not an “empath”. You are not even in touch with your own feelings, you are simply hyper-vigilant, and often times your fight, flight, freeze, and especially fawn responses, are extremely off-putting and uncomfortable to even a slightly more well-adjusted person. I believe codependents and even Cluster B’s are capable of (total, not impaired) empathy, but only after reversing toxic patterns of relationship behavior. This, however, is in no way their FAULT. I would not say that being codependent or someone with any Cluster B personality disorder (who all have narcissistic traits) is in any way that person’s FAULT. But it unfortunately is their responsibility now. I do not view this relational style (of codependency or narcissistic) as unfixable or irreversible. I would argue that every single person who is codependent or has a Cluster B PD one hundred percent has C-PTSD. (There are people with C-PTSD who have done more healing work and do not fall into these categories but that’s not who I’m talking about.) If you are codependent or are in Cluster B, you have sustained significant trauma, most likely from your parents, and you now have a warped idea of healthy and acceptable communication. You most likely have sustained a thousand little cuts from them while growing up. Being belittled, shamed, degraded, devalued, discarded, threatened, ignored, neglected, silenced, and deemed completely unworthy of genuine love. That is unacceptable and even unforgivable in some cases. I would never condone that. I wish you healing forever.

how it feels to refer to men’s “pecs” as their tits