Clanking Around the Universe

A fun fact about me is that it feels really good to cum inside me

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

what's not clicking

So Pokemon Go came out and I legit walked around for three hours in the dark, met like five of my neighbors also looking for Pokemon, and saw a grown ass man trudge into a pond. What a time to be alive.

nintendo’s plan to make everyone get out the house is working spectacularly if a bit odd.

“Working spectacularly, if a bit odd” is Nintendo’s entire goddamn business model.

Sometimes you just need to hear how much you mean to someone

Remember: toe beans are the sign of a killer.

Funnily enough, I’m not 100% joking. While many animals have paw pads, the particular kind of soft, squishy beans found on housecats are an adaptation for stealth. Squishy beans mean you’re looking at an ambush predator.

These are the beans of a killer, Bella.

You really weren't lying

forget wanderlust, sonder, all those words for vague dreamy feelings… what I’m asking for is a concise word for the feeling you get when someone makes an assumption about you that’s 100% correct but you really don’t like that anyone was able to make that assumption. for now I’m calling it a fuckor

“he asked me ‘you main junkrat right’ and a wave of fuckor wracked my feeble body”

I want to fall in love but men only ever want me for my fat cock and my knowledge of blood magic

Happy 10 year anniversary to this absolutely foundational post

#really cannot emphasize enough how much iguanamouth changed the site’s sense of humor and therefore the timeline of the western world