Panda

A dry sense of humping

writing tip: put words on page. hope this helps. i will not be taking questions because i have not done this

i’m sorry for talking about wanting a cock in my mouth so much. you can make me shut up with your cock. in my mouth

Ilya cannot commit to a lockscreen so he has a full album of pictures that rotate. Pictures of him and Shane looking happy and disgustingly in love, pictures from Shane's photoshoots where he looks mouthwateringly hot, a couple of pictures of Anya though Shane is also featured in some of them, pictures of Shane at various events looking distinguished and dapper and also still so hot, a few from their wedding day. Every time he picks up his phone and sees that the picture has switched he gets a soft little smile on his face, just taking a moment to look at it before unlocking his phone, heart eyes on full display. It's a running joke among the Centaurs that if Shane isn't around on a night out, Roz is not allowed to look at his phone or he's going home immediately.

Shane's lockscreen is Ilya grinning at the camera, still in hockey gear, hair damp with sweat, his lip split and bleeding from a fight on the ice.

went to a new optometrist today wearing my squid facts ‘save our freaks dont mine the deep’ shirt from @sarahmackattack that has a strawberry squid on it. and i wasn’t even thinking about it but the optometrist walked in and he was like ‘oh what does your shirt say’ so i showed him and he was like ‘oh that’s neat!’ and then i thought he might like to know about strawberry squid eyes since they have weird eyes and he is an optometrist and all. so i was like ‘yeah it’s actually a real kind of squid called a strawberry squid, their eyes are really cool because they have one big yellow-green one and one small blue one’ and he kind of gasped and went ‘oh my god that’s so interesting i wonder why they have that. do you know what their retina composition is like?’ and i watched as he minimized my chart on the computer and started looking up images of strawberry squid and then he googled ‘strawberry squid retina composition’ and he was like ‘sorry we’ll get to your eye exam in a moment i just really want to find out’ LMAO 10/10 optometrist experience will be returning

the trans male experience is being afraid that if you wash your hands in a public men's restroom you will be clocked

one time I went in the men's room at a bar, got clocked and told I needed to leave so later I walked up to that dude at a table with some chick and announced to her that He Doesn't Wash His Hands After Handling His Dick and walked away

you are quite literally braver than any U.S. marine

reblog if you too are bi and confused or support others’ right to be bi and confused