Looking through my messages I was asked "How can I help my depressed/suicidal friend?" As most people know when dealing with a depressed/suicidal friend they will not likely tell you how to help them, so in the effort to help someone else and NOT me. I have composed this list of 15 things you can do/try that may help them, but also calm your mind as you maybe very worried about your friend.
1.) Always double check everything with them. If they say they are going out ask them where and before they leave ask again. If you ask if they will be okay ask twice. Ask them more than once because lying is easy once, but if you ask twice they will become suspicious you know something if they are trying to do something.
2.) Tell them you love them and fight them if they do not believe you. Most depressed people think their friends and love ones just say things and do not mean them, so if you get the impression they do not believe you MAKE THEM understand how much you do.
3.) Invite them places or invite yourself to see them. Make it known you want them in your life for more than just help. Tell them directly you want them to be with you.
4.) If they are acting super strange either way too happy or like a different person go immediately and do NOT leave them alone. That could save their life because they are probably on the edge.
5.) Tell them how your life would be worst without them. Not in just in the way they help you or make you feel, but the impact they have had on your life and how their death would affect you. (You may need to think about if they kill themselves and make yourself believe they did to fully be able to tell them how you would feel and react.)
6.) Your friend may do or say things that are hurtful. While this will need to be addressed it should not be addressed right away. If you are quick to anger your reaction maybe what they are looking for as the last straw in them believing they have pushed you away and you would no longer care.
7.) Give them space, but not too much. They may not want to be around people, but check in throughout the day. If possible in person if not that is okay. Just make it known you are there if they need you.
8.) Plan a weekly activity you know they like. Even if they do not enjoy it right now they will appreciate you trying to do something to make them happy later.
9.) Mornings will probably be the hardest. Especially getting out of bed. Try and make that easier with a simple text wishing them a good day or telling them how you feel or maybe ask them if they are free for breakfast.
10.) Try to be positive around them. Positivity spreads and if you are looking on the bright side it will help to find good things too.
11.) Look up and try coping skills with them. If you do them together it will feel less like work and it could help you deal with stuff going on in your life as well.
12.) Understand they are sick and going through something. Just like with other illnesses they are sick and it may take time for them to get better and there will be ups and downs. The better you understand how they react and how you can help the easier it will be if this happens again in the future.
13.) Let them know that you also have issues and they are not the only person going through things, but do not overwhelm them. Talk about issues that are similar to theirs and how you got through them.
14.) Let them feel the way they do. People feel emotions differently, so what might affect them harshly may seem like nothing to you. Listen and try to understand why this is so hard for them.
15.) Take care of yourself too. As long as you do not feel like every second of the day your friend will hurt themselves take a couple minutes to take care of yourself. You may even be able to do this with your friend! Do not let their sadness consume you.
These might not work in saving or helping your friend, but they are things you can try and things I know have helped the people who I have dealt with. Your friend is still your friend, even if they have forgotten who they are. While dealing with someone with depression is hard and can drain you; if your friend is suicidal you could be saving them. You do not need to fix them to save them. You just have to show them in a way they will understand that you do care and that they are important to you.