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One Nice Bug Per Day

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Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
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@pyrokinesia
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"are you gonna take those pills the rest of your life?" you mean my molecules? why surely you wouldn't deprive me of my molecules. they are shaped exactly just so, you see. my molecules
do you know how hard someone had to work to make my molecules into their molecule shapes??
they invented a new shape of molecule just for me and you want me to what, not absorb it???
reblog to remind somebody about their molecules
people who shape molecules at their jobs found this post and they're in the notes being happy to be appreciated. go take your fucking molecules
Me, pointing to the mirror: Do NOT become The Joker about this. This isn’t even a Condiment King situation.
99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!
FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME
BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND
PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING
tv from the mid 2000s was so good. if you can look past the everything

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maarten inghels
@sherbertilluminated there's a line somewhere in Ursula Vernon's Digger that goes something like "it is difficult to be metaphysical around the truly geologically minded"
Use your PTO
Timepiece with the fewest moving parts:
Sundial.
Timepiece with the most moving parts:
Hourglass.
#sundial has some noteworthy moving parts#like the sun#and the earth
i hate it when people ask me to "explain my thought process" like hell if i know
"what's going on in that head of yours?" nothing i want to be a part of
the 'how big is your english vocabulary' test dropped new ship dynamics

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you guys are so right, I should have added the best part
This meme ages like a fine wine every year that passes.
I enjoy a joke about fucked up German fairy tales as much as the next nerd, but it's genuinely striking how often the source for the really fucked up stuff turns out to be "yeah, this is only in the Brothers Grimm version and doesn't appear in any extant oral tradition, and we're like 80% sure they added it themselves". To a large extent it's not German fairy tales that are fucked up, it's two specific German dudes.
in retrospect we probably should have given the fairy tale writing to the Brothers Happy instead
"average German fairy tale is full of fucked up shit" factoid actualy just statistical error. average German fairy tales are no more fucked up than others. Fucked-Up Shit Enjoyers Wilhelm and Jacob, who lived in cave & wrote fucked up fairy tales each day, are an outlier adn should not have been counted
Sometimes a family is you, your best friend and maid, the detective you have unbearable sexual tension with, the police inspector with a puppy crush on your maid, the orphaned children that adopted you, your butler Mr. Butler, and two gay communist taxi drivers who hang out in your house
Debating silently showing this to one of the flight attendants while boarding
I SHOWED IT TO MY FLIGHT ATTENDANT WHEN HE GAVE ME MY COOKIES AND HE LAUGHED SO HARD HE TOOK MY PHONE TO SHOW IT TO THE OTHER FLIGHT ATTENDANT
I don’t know how you got a good grade in being a passenger on an airline but that’s a totally normal thing to achieve and I’m not seething with jealousy at all.

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Was talking to a coworker today who explained that her grandfather was like Snow White “but Californian. And an old man.” in that the creatures of the forest would follow him around and presumably duet with him.
“When he died the ravens sat in the trees outside for a week, watching. Taking turns. A horde of raccoons tried to break into the house every night, tearing at the siding. Eventually they gave up, but it was unsettling.”
“Aww. They were checking on him!” I said, like a normal person. Internally, I thought “Maybe you could do the thing you do with dead pets, where you show them to the living pets so the living pet understands they’re gone. But I guess if you did that to a bunch of scavenging species, they’d be like “Well, that’s very sad but he IS food now.” So what you’d need, for human sensibilities, is some sort of transparent corpse barrier. Like a see-through coffin oh that’s what the dwarves were doing! You’ve stopped paying attention to this conversation about the loss of a beloved family member you gotta phase back in.”
oh that's what the dwarves were doing
Neither romantic nor sexual nor platonic but a secret fourth thing (bonded like stray cats who cannot be adopted separately)