Episode 3: Return of the Queen

8 years of me going "wow the experiences that trans women describe about growing up in a prison of masculinity and feeling drawn to femininity despite how forbidden it feels to like it openly are so intensely relatable. i guess i don't feel a strong relationship to masculinity myself but i'm not like, you know, trans or something. im okay with being a man." before i realized it btw

maybe if people didn't call me cis+. maybe if i'd seen more transfem enbies have their transness taken seriously instead of being written off as "basically men". maybe if i didn't see transfem enbies treat themselves as basically men and strangers to transness. maybe if i saw more transfem enbies period. i don't know.

everywhere in the queer community transfems are made to be slightly outside of it

If you're wondering why there's so much resistance to the idea of a 4-day work week, or why automation hasn't actually led to people working less like it was supposed to...

it's not even that jkr isn't a general transphobe as well, obviously she is, but the frequency with which a trans woman talking about transmisogyny and how it harms transfems and using that specific language to describe that specific phenomenon is immediately translated to "transphobia" and "trans people" when it reaches a wider audience is like. idk you can't stop noticing it once you do. why are you so uncomfortable with the idea of talking about women and centering them in the conversations that they start

genuinely so frustrating when youtubers swear or say something like "kill" or "suicide" out loud uncensored, but the subtitles censor it. like why the fuck, if YouTube is gonna get your ass for writing "kill myself", literally who wouldn't it get you for Saying It??? all it does is make me feel babied as someone who has sensory processing issues, and I can't imagine how much worse I would feel if I was completely deaf. why do hearing people get the uncensored version but we get the toddlerified end??? how is that fair?

after I wrote this post I lost hearing in one ear for a while and it only made this feeling worse.

does anyone remember that "androphobia" is a real word that means being genuinely Afraid of men. and it's mostly used to describe women who are intensely scared of men following abuse/assault. and this is a whole thing where you can have a service dog that keeps men away. because i remember that, having known several women both cis and trans who were like this, and it really is odd to see the term misused as another word for misandry lol that is not what it means

i really like transfem wish fulfillment stuff i just wish it didn't make me aware of gaping holes in my chest that have always been there

calling things "cutes" is so uh. what's a good word for when something is cute but slightly more cute

the word cutes is autological

problematic spankability gap