save the bees

“what’s the worst fruit” i hope you fucking die im strangling you what the hell is wrong with you. ‘the worst fruit’… has god not made all of these fruits in the same light???? cunt

Red Delicious Apples

May I someday gain the same level of succinct cutting vitriol criticism as the applerankings.

last night was talking to my dad about career plans and he goes "i dont know if you should do a trade, you should print tshirts and sell them at the oceanfront"

I didn’t watch supernatural because it’s a monster hunting show but I never saw a single person talk about the monsters. bad sign

“you’re allowed to relax, you know” unfortunately i cannot do that. Otherwise they will get me

for about a month in the early 2010s people used to say things like climate change is real and gay people deserve rights. does anyone remember this

the internet seems like a distant dream

whatever we are on rn is not the internet. It's ads

I wasn’t gonna talk about it but one of my parents died the other day and the weirdest part has been not talking about it, specifically because they sucked and I kind of don’t care and that’s not a very hashtag relateable thing to bring up around the office so I’m just walking around at work rn like “nah not much going on hbu”

As a “dark humour is my coping mechanism” person I would describe this feeling as “children’s birthday clown with a flashbang grenade” and I gotta say, the deeply fucked up power is intoxicating

love when you go to an aquarium and you really hit it off with one of the fish

Your therapist asks you "Who in this image do you see yourself as?" and then shows you a drawing of two shirtless skinny anime catboys with a thread of saliva going between their lips

It was actually just an ink blot but thank you, this gives me a lot to work with

I will lock in tomorrow like nobody has ever locked in before