harder better faster gaben

bitches hate me for my earnest whimsy and my pathological degree of avoidant behavior

Actually he took out a gun with which he shot himself

why did the italian restaurant give him a gun instead of a meatball marinara......

There is not even time for a quick jerk off

hey patrick can you see my feet

Yeah spongebob look at mine I’m facing the toilet

Patrick we have penises and were peeing with them

Excuse me ladies, everything you’ve just said about being spongbeob and Patrick and having penises you pee pee with has been echoed and amplified down the hall, were we are holding a Sunday school class. We all have heard what you’ve said about peeing towards the toilet with your penises, and I am just letting you know.

airplanes were first conceptualized when the wright brothers orville and redenbacher saw a bird and said what if we made a mechanical one of those that looks vaguely fuckable