self-compassion: an antidote to shame mb

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self-compassion: an antidote to shame mb

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Twin Peaks, 2.20 // from Emily Wilsonâs Introduction to The Iliad // post by @starpeace // from Nona the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir // The Magnus Archives 151 // post by @sheryllee // from âGlamor on the West Streets / Silver Over Everything" by Hanif Abdurraqib // tweet by Rebecca Solnit
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Actual roman epitaph for a dog
humans are the same
Iâve seen this one doing the rounds a few times (and it makes me cry every time I see it), but was curious about the original Latin text, so I did some digging: itâs a shortened version of CIL 10, 00659, a tombstone from Salernum (modern Salerno, Italy). (source; CIL is the Corpus Inscriptionum Latinarum).
Portaui lacrimis madidus te, nostra catella,
   Quod feci lustris laetior ante tribus.
Ergo mihi, Patrice, iam non dabis oscula mille
   Nec poteris collo grata cubare meo.
Tristis marmorea posui te sede merentem
   Et iunxi semper manib(us) ipse meis
Morib(us) argutis hominem simulare paratam,
   Perdidimus quales hei mihi delicias.
Tu, dulcis Patrice, nostras attingere mensas
  Consueras, gremio poscere blanda cibos,
Lambere tu calicem lingua rapiente solebas,
   Quem tibi saepe meae sustinuere manus,
Accipere et lassum cauda gaudente frequenter
And hereâs my translation:
Wet with tears I have carried you, our little (female) dog, just as I did in happier times fifteen years earlier (lit. âthree periods of five years). For myself, Patrice, now you will not give me a thousand kisses nor will you be able to lie lovingly around/against my neck. I have sorrowfully placed you, merit-worthy, in a marble tomb and I have joined you always to myself in death, as by your cleverness you matched a human. Alas, we lost such pleasures for myself! You, sweet Patrice, were accustomed to join us at our table, to beg charmingly for food (while sitting in our) laps. You were in the habit of greedily licking our cups with your tongue, which my hands often held for you. Frequently and joyfully (you) receive a weary one with your (wagging) tail...
tl;dr: this dog was named Patrice and was very, very loved. (another translation with some glossing of the text.)
It's the fact she's joined to them in death, it's the fact that she sat in her owner's arms and ate their food. That he held the cups down for her to drink from....
Hundreds of years and we still know she was loved. We still know how she liked to sleep. All these years!! Loving dogs is the same!!!!
me trying to convince myself that the whole spectrum of human emotions is a good and necessary thing to feel even if its not comfortable while im actively experiencing emotions that make me feel like my bones are being dissolved in acid
the angel staying over at my house asked for a nightlight in their room and i told them buddy, don't you produce your own light? what're you gonna do with more? and they said they wanted to see why people like it so much. and also that the nightlight i own is blue and they're been trying to understand color. anyways i think they've stared at it for an hour now
the angel staying over at my house said their eyes hurt from staring, so i took them to the store to get some eye drops. well midway through the medicine aisle i turned around to see them flashing in and out of colors like a combusting star, so i asked them what was up without looking directly at them. they told me that there were too many people at the store and they forgot how they looked. which. is understandable to be honest they've only been on earth for a little over 24 hours. my phone started to melt a little when i showed them pictures of themself, but my hand feels fine even though they held it while calming down. they're currently resting and i am not sure what to do with 5 empty bottles of eye drops
the angel staying over at my house has been eating my food for the past few days and i don't really know if they can taste it because the food sort of bursts into ash and fire before it reaches their mouth? but they seem to enjoy eating it or at least watching me cook. they tried to help me fry some onions earlier but the stove flame turned from blue to white and the onions started crackling instead of sizzling so they backed off. however they have the ability to chop garlic like a pro
the angel staying over at my house is taking daily walks with me around the neighborhood and i don't think they know about animals yet. we were going past someone's house and this labrador started barking at us. normal, right? but the angel staying over at my house asked me if that was music. and i had to stop and think about that one for a second. in the end i said it can be music to us, it's just that the dog doesn't know it (and may never know it, which is a real tragedy). then they asked me what's a dog
the angel staying over at my house went to the library with me and they wanted to know if humans actually dream or if that was something people made up for television. guess what the staff told us that the full name of the angel staying over at my house couldn't be printed on a library card so i just said well couldn't we have one anyways? and now we do but it's really like the first third of their name and not written correctly. oh well. i have to go help carry some huge books about neuroscience into the house
today the angel staying over at my house came up to me and started crying tears that melted through my carpet. told me they realised they wouldn't be able to use their library card after they left earth and i. i honestly forgot that was going to happen. but i told them hey dude that's just how humans feel too. can't read all the books, but the fact that you got to read some is worth bragging about, right? they could tell all of their angel friends about the cool stuff they've done. and they said that they used to think that the world was so small and that humans were being petty about missing earth but now they live here and they feel small too. and they're not sure what to tell their angel friends.
so i asked to hold their hand again. they didn't burn me this time, either. and i asked them if this moment felt small to them. they said it didn't.
anyways we made popcorn and watched it's a wonderful life. they told me that angels don't speak like that at all by the way
I tried to illustrate the second part
i like to pretend i already died and asked god to send me back to earth so i can swim in lakes again and see mountains and get my heart broken and love my friends and cry so hard in the bathroom and go grocery shopping 1,000 more times. and that i promised i would never forget the miracle of being here
â our town, thornton wilder
if y'all ever wonder how mentally ill I am just take into consideration that right now I'm emotional over the relationships between lines- actually I'm making shitty ms paint diagrams about it so y'all can try to understand my visions here.

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My new favorite genre of picture is a very special thing that most animals (and humans!) do: face nuzzling as an act of greeting/comfort/intimacy. thank God that this is happening all over the world right now
Isnât it wonderful?!
had to continue the compilation:
I have a folder called Time is a Flat Circle in which I collect evidence of humanity. Here is most of them.
Okayokayokayokaybut "My hand will wear out but the inscription will remain" is kind of a power line BEFORE you factor in that it is, in fact, over a thousand years old.
Itâs always good to spend a few moments, on a quiet day, looking through the Family album.
Actual roman epitaph for a dog
humans are the same
Iâve seen this one doing the rounds a few times (and it makes me cry every time I see it), but was curious about the original Latin text, so I did some digging: itâs a shortened version of CIL 10, 00659, a tombstone from Salernum (modern Salerno, Italy). (source; CIL is the Corpus Inscriptionum Latinarum).
Portaui lacrimis madidus te, nostra catella,
   Quod feci lustris laetior ante tribus.
Ergo mihi, Patrice, iam non dabis oscula mille
   Nec poteris collo grata cubare meo.
Tristis marmorea posui te sede merentem
   Et iunxi semper manib(us) ipse meis
Morib(us) argutis hominem simulare paratam,
   Perdidimus quales hei mihi delicias.
Tu, dulcis Patrice, nostras attingere mensas
  Consueras, gremio poscere blanda cibos,
Lambere tu calicem lingua rapiente solebas,
   Quem tibi saepe meae sustinuere manus,
Accipere et lassum cauda gaudente frequenter
And hereâs my translation:
Wet with tears I have carried you, our little (female) dog, just as I did in happier times fifteen years earlier (lit. âthree periods of five years). For myself, Patrice, now you will not give me a thousand kisses nor will you be able to lie lovingly around/against my neck. I have sorrowfully placed you, merit-worthy, in a marble tomb and I have joined you always to myself in death, as by your cleverness you matched a human. Alas, we lost such pleasures for myself! You, sweet Patrice, were accustomed to join us at our table, to beg charmingly for food (while sitting in our) laps. You were in the habit of greedily licking our cups with your tongue, which my hands often held for you. Frequently and joyfully (you) receive a weary one with your (wagging) tail...
tl;dr: this dog was named Patrice and was very, very loved. (another translation with some glossing of the text.)
i have the opposite of that âeveryone is an npcâ mentality people have embraced where iâm instead like. the person next to me in line has someone they canât wait to go home to, the person picking up their mail has felt devastation before, everyone in this grocery store is doing their sunday shopping, maybe the person that just honked at me is having the worst day of their life, my neighbor has doctors appointments and favorite foods and a song they canât stand to hear anymore⌠you are all fully realized complex people and that is overwhelming me on a spiritual levelâŚ

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âAfter learning my flight was detained 4 hours, I heard the announcement: if anyone in the vicinity of gate 4-A understands any Arabic, please come to the gate immediately. Wellâone pauses these days. Gate 4-A was my own gate. I went there. An older woman in full traditional Palestinian dress, just like my grandma wore, was crumpled to the floor, wailing loudly. Help, said the flight service person. Talk to her. What is her problem? We told her the flight was going to be four hours late and she did this. I put my arm around her and spoke to her haltingly. Shu dow-a, shu-biduck habibti, stani stani schway, min fadlick, sho bit se-wee? The minute she heard any words she knewâhowever poorly usedâshe stopped crying. She thought our flight had been canceled entirely. She needed to be in El Paso for some major medical treatment the following day. I said no, no, weâre fine, youâll get there, just late. Who is picking you up? Letâs call him and tell him. We called her son and I spoke with him in English. I told him I would stay with his mother until we got on the plane and would ride next to herâSouthwest. She talked to him. Then we called her other sons just for the fun of it. Then we called my dad and he and she spoke for a while in Arabic and found out, of course, they had ten shared friends. Then I thought just for the heck of it why not call some Palestinian poets I know and let them chat with her. This all took up about 2 hours. She was laughing a lot by then. Telling about her life. Answering questions. She had pulled a sack of homemade mamool cookiesâlittle powdered sugar crumbly mounds stuffed with dates and nutsâout of her bagâand was offering them to all the women at the gate. To my amazement, not a single woman declined one. It was like a sacrament. The traveler from Argentina, the traveler from California, the lovely woman from Laredoâwe were all covered with the same powdered sugar. And smiling. There are no better cookies. And then the airline broke out the free beverages from huge coolersânon-alcoholicâand the two little girls from our flight, one African American, one Mexican Americanâran around serving us all apple juice and lemonade, and they were covered with powdered sugar, too. And I noticed my new best friendâby now we were holding handsâhad a potted plant poking out of her bag, some medicinal thing with green furry leaves. Such an old country traveling tradition. Always carry a plant. Always stay rooted to somewhere. And I looked around that gate of late and weary ones and thought, this is the world I want to live in. The shared world. Not a single person in this gateâonce the crying of confusion stoppedâhas seemed apprehensive about any other person. They took the cookies. I wanted to hug all those other women, too. This can still happen anywhere. Not everything is lost.â
â Naomi Shihab Nye (b. 1952), âWandering Around an Albuquerque Airport Terminal.â
Everything That Happens Can Be Called Aging
by Carl Adamshick
I have more love than ever. Our kids have kids soon to have kids. I need them. I need everyone to come over to the house, sleep on the floor, on the couches in the front room. I need noise, too many people in too small a space, I need dancing, the spilling of drinks, the loud pronouncements over music, the verbal sparring, the broken dishes, the wealth. I need it all flying apart. My friends to slam against me, to hold me, to say they love me. I need mornings to ask for favors and forgiveness. I need to give, have all my emotions rattled, my family to be greedy, to keep coming, to keep asking and taking. I need no resolution, just the constant turmoil of living. Give me the bottom of the river, all the unadorned, unfinished, unpraised moments, one good turn on the luxuriant wheel.