Decorations

Musí chudáci řešit rodinný problémy pana Bernarda.

and put oneself in the shoes of henry’s mother, whose pregnancy not only infringed wedlock but class, yet whose child was raised by a socially sound and kind man. she loved martin and could do so freely! they were so secure in their love, in fact, that they could share a joke about their son’s blue-bloodedness without an ounce of insecurity. she found her disposition a great blessing! imagine having this unique contentment within your grasp while living by the palisades of an over-involved lord? a lord whose entitlement won over his judgement? a lord who invites rumor and ignores anxiety? a lord who loves but fails to see he does one more thing above all: to lord over.

I am always struck by how deeply KCD1 Radzig fears Henry's rejection. He comes so close to telling him the truth so many times over the course of KCD1, and you can actually see him lose his courage and deflate. Why? Because he's afraid of being spurned by this peasant boy he begot, a boy who is his only remaining family and only living connection to two people he (Radzig) presumably (once) loved. Again and again, he can only bring himself to offer Henry praise and affection in disguise, calling him "son" with a little too much weight to his back.

How thoroughly humanizing! And what a strong indication of his emotion, despite his dedication to rationality and restraint.

I wonder that Radzig must look at Henry and see so much of Martin, so much of his mother, and so little of himself. He is surprised by Henry, proud of him more often than not, and bemused by the echoes of himself he recognizes (such as Henry's tendency to yammer and pontificate, though at a much different level and tone).

And again and again, Radzig protects Henry, in his way. I would not be surprised to learn that he refuses to adopt him because Radzig IS keenly aware of the danger and complication that would bring to Henry's life. What more can Radzig, a lord without his land, offer Henry now by legitimizing him? Better, perhaps, to let him remain a shadow of a son, safer, happier, and simpler, with some measure of freedom left to pursue his own wants and his own life.

Radzig tells us, again and again, that he values self-determination, stoicism, rational thought, and deliberate choices above all. No wonder that he would seek to protect as much of these values for Henry as possible, even beyond what he himself can enjoy.

AT LAST....... I'M FREE

Approximately seven months and almost 12,000 stitches later...... behold :') I don't even know what else to write anymore gfdsgsd just look at it. Please.

I love him omg. I would feed him every day.

Some pencil sketches I scanned because I was too lazy to draw in digital.

He is such a baby boy. I can't.