Make-shift horror doll

There’s someone who has their iPhone named “hot single horses in your area” and they airdrop people pictures of horses randomly. Nobody knows who it is. Once, during an assembly, the laptop that the projector was from had airdrop turned on, and in the middle of a presentation about bullying, it popped up in front of the entire school. HOT SINGLE HORSES IN YOUR AREA WANTS TO SHARE AN IMAGE. A picture of a horse, with text in bubble letters over it saying “available”

Translation: “I am fucking tired of the soviet car industry” *the standard effect of touching a soviet car* *laughs in russian*

I can’t get over the sheer poetry of how the car falls apart - the perfect chain reaction escalating as it travels round.

This is the single funniest video on the Internet

they drilled a bunch of holes into me for no reason

The masculine connotation of a bow tie and the feminine connotation of a bow on the top of the head implies a nonbinary bow style placed directly over the nose

I say shit like "If my memory serves me" knowing damn well it serves the dark lord

platonic third base: when you get to know someone well enough that they start making mortifyingly specific observations about you

yesterday i was chilling with my friend and there was an ice cream van outside and every time the jingle played i'd look out the window and after the third time i did this my friend said, accurately, 'i think you want to get ice cream but you're scared of the ice cream man.' devastating

Im not compatible with a single person on the entire planet

not El rebloging, when she is compatible w me😩

You know what, you're right *kisses you*

come here my love *spins you around*

im in the my friends ocs fandom