during a quiet night at the station harry turns to ravi and says 'hey rav, fuck marry kill, chim, eddie or buck?'
'obviously kill buck-' 'oh yeah, obviously' (buck, lifting his head up from where he's sprawled in a recliner: hey.) '-fuck eddie, I've got eyes. marry chim for the sweet captain privileges.'
(eddie, from the other recliner, without lifting his head: nice.)
'hey cap,' harry hollers, 'fuck marry kill, ravi, eddie or buck?'
'I'm pretty sure this is a HR violation,' says chim from where he's doing admin at the dining table. 'but uhhh. buck, I'm sorry, you're my brother and I love you, but I can’t. I've gotta kill you-'
(What the fuck?? says buck)
'transfer ravi to another house and then fuck him, I guess. eddie, I'll marry you.'
(yeah ok says eddie around a big yawn)
chim says, 'hen, you're exempt, lesbian card in play.' (thank you lord says hen without looking up from the book she's reading.) 'harry, you're exempt because I need to be able to look your mom in the eyes'
(And because he's, what? twelve? mutters buck.
Im eighteen and three quarters, hisses harry.
Spoken like a true 12 year old)
'buckaroo, fuck marry kill, eddie, ravi or-'
'I'm killing ravi.'
'ah, ah, let me finish! eddie, ravi or your truly.'
'kill ravi. then uh. Uh.' buck clears his throat. (hen lowers her book.) 'I'm uh, I'll marry chim, he, you know, I already know he's a good husband. a-and jee and nash are already buckley hans, so that's. convenient.'
'and you'll fuck eddie,' hen concludes, placidly.
'as a friend.'
'you don't want to marry me?' eddie says, sounding a little hurt.
'I - it's not that I don't want to marry you, I just really don't wanna fuck chim or ravi.'
'so you do want to fuck eddie,' ravi says.
'you said you'd fuck eddie!'
'well duh. I mean, i'm straight but look at him.'
'I'm always looking at him!!!'
an awkward silence. harry, deeply confused, whispers 'what is happening?'
'it's my turn,' says eddie, 'kill ravi. fuck chim, as a friend. marry buck.'
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Family has always been at the heart of 911, whether it's the family you're born into or the one you choose. This week's recs celebrate the relationships and connections that hold Buck and Eddie together.
(click here for previous lists!)
22 fic recs under the cut:
1. the plant on the windowsill (and other things that grow) by avidreader0202 (7.1k, General) Warnings: none
Theo does not want to bed without getting a story and goodnight from Eddie. After being convinced by Theo, Buck takes to the firehouse were they all fall asleep together in the couch. They get teased by the fire fam, buck has a crisis, and finally they get together.
Reccer says: It has a very cute Theo and some of my favorite tropes like falling asleep together, being teased by the fire fam, and co-parenting.
2. oh brother, I see (you burn like me) by canadadry (47.9k, Mature) Warnings: mentions of ptsd/suicide
Adriana arrives in LA. Maddie has been here the whole time. (buddie character study through their sisters)
Reccer says: i like the different perspectives of adriana and maddie and all the family dynamics. it's just very fun!
3. fourth floor balcony jump by iriswests (@fcntasmas) (20.3k, Teen) Warnings: Author Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings
sophia moves to LA, gains buck as a roommate, and immediately regrets all her life choices
Reccer says: love love love love love this characterization of Sophia! the entire fic is such a delight to read. it's one of the first i read in this fandom and it's really stuck with me since i read it!
4. Pocketful of Sunshine by kae_118 (4.9k, General) Warnings: none
Buck didn't think twice when he set a photo of Christopher as his lockscreen. Eddie, however, spirals a little when he finds out.
Reccer says: Very sweet and true to character! Buck WOULD do something like that without realizing the implications of it, and Eddie WOULD crash out a little about it.
5. there's more than teenage wasteland by iphigenias (4k, Teen) Warnings: post-partum depression
Buckleys don’t ask for help. Buck and Maddie try to change that with each other.
Reccer says: buckley siblings my beloved! there's something so tender about buck and maddie trying their very best to be good to each other despite it all, and finding family outside of each other while still loving each other so so much.
6. one dad, two dad by maygrantnash (@eddiebodywantssome) (3.8k, Not Rated) Warnings: none
christopher has a realisation and subsequent question for his two favourite adults
Reccer says: a younger chris questioning buddie is always so fun, and this really captures that kid feeling without going too saccharine.
7. sweet kid, running by Chancy_Lurking (4k, Teen) Warnings: Panic Attacks, Suicide Mention (no attempt), Running Away
Chris flies back to L.A. without asking forgiveness or permission.
Reccer says: incredible teenage chris fic, captures all the angst and anger of being a teen in his situation, and the dynamic with both eddie and buck is pitch perfect.
8. two truths, one big-ass lie by collieflower (2.9k, General) Warnings: none
Where they're hosting the first party of the school year, and two truths/one lie is too easy a game for the Buckley-Diazes.
Reccer says: chris and his friends are so fun, and it's always a delight to see buck and eddie dealing with the teen sass of their kid! the buckley-diaz ability to make their ndes into fun trivia is also always excellent.
9. help is on the way (they said, they said) by donationwayne (@donationwayne) (6.7k, General) Warnings: Minor Injuries, Suicidal Ideation
The 118 venture up to Washington to help battle a wildfire. Buck gets his foot caught in a animal trap. Hen and Buck have a heart to heart about how Buck really feels about his best friend moving to Texas.
Reccer says: hen and buck are such a good pair, and this captures their dynamic so well! with a bonus of the other members of the firefam caring for each other.
10. Team Up for Fire Safety by CourtepointeClementine (@CourtepointeClementine) (17.8k, Teen) Warnings: none
Eddie has been parenting solo for a long time — except maybe he hasn’t? Maybe he doesn’t have to?
Reccer says: a really grounded take on buddie coparenting, incredibly nuanced and sweet and eddie you are such a moron i SWEAR.
11. it's all fun and games (and family) by becausebuckley (@becausebuckley) (8.2k, Teen) Warnings: none
five times buck plans a game night, and one time he's invited.
12. pick me, choose me, love me by trysetmeonfire (@try-set-me-on-fire) (8.3k, Teen) Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Injury
Eddie wants to scream. Eddie wants to talk to Buck. There are questions he should ask - Do you know when the bleeding started? How long has it been? How bad does it hurt? Are you injured anywhere else? There is a conversation he wants to have - If I leave you here I don’t know that you’ll be alive when I get back. There are protocols, in disaster situations. If you can only save one person, you save the one most likely to survive. Beyond protocol, you always fucking save the kid. Beyond that, it's our kid. It’s our fucking kid, it’s Christopher, and I am going to get him to the surface and in doing so I am going to leave you for dead. But it’s Buck, and they never really needed words to talk, and Buck is still looking at him, and Eddie knows what he'd say. He'd downplay the injury. He knows the protocol. And he’d already said it, damned him out loud, he’s going to take you back up top and then come back for me.
Reccer says: buckchris nde is always a hit, and this is such a good take on it with established relationship buddie!
13. coastal shelf by theundiagnosable (12k, Teen) Warnings: none
A fic which allows Shannon in death what she didn't get the chance to have in life -- a fully realized and individual personhood-- through the lens of a ghost watching the boys she left behind keep going and the family she lost keep growing.
Reccer says: I liked it!
14. candy bar by snowflake194 (@snowflake194) (1.4k, Teen) Warnings: none
In the immediate aftermath of Buck's kidnapping, Maddie finds the faith and strength to let someone else watch over her brother's hospital bedside.
Reccer says: I liked it!
14. what's waiting out there (we can never know) by Rehearsal_Dweller (@agentsnickers) (112.8k, General) Warnings: franker-than-canon discussion of Buck's canonical self-harm and suicidal tendencies (not very heavy though!)
At 22, Buck got one of his hookups pregnant and decided to keep the baby himself rather than let her be put up for adoption. At 26, he joined the 118. You know the rest, right?
Reccer says: This fic is so so so so wonderful, oh how i wish i could read it for the first time again!! A re-read will have to do <3 Lovely delicious slow burn canon rewrite with Buck and Eddie both as single dads weaving their family into one! Buck's OC kid is such a delight!
15. Exhibit B by Daisies_and_Briars (@cal-daisies-and-briars) (10.9k, Teen) Warnings: none
Seven years in the future, an adult Christopher has a chance to see his grandparents - and subsequently, his father - in a new light, on a family trip to El Paso.
Reccer says: This is a very interesting and nuanced take on the difficulties of family members having different relationships with one another, and growing up to realise that someone you love maybe doesn't treat the other people you love in a way that you can bear.
16. three clicks and i'm home by astrolesbian (9k, Teen) Warnings: none
eddie moves back to el paso. adriana tries to pick up where they left off fourteen years ago, with mixed results.
Reccer says: a true tour de force of sibling relationships, of the messiness of family dynamics, and of figuring out what your relationship is like now you've both grown up and apart
17. we're overdue for a revival by saintsnames (21.3k, General) Warnings: ableism, religious trauma
While in Texas, Chris starts going to healing services at the church.
Reccer says: This really grapples with ableism, religion, and trauma. On what it means to let someone else make choices in how to raise your child, especially if you realise too late that you disagree with the choices they make. It's aching and carefully written and painful and truly beautiful
18. I'll stand by you (won't let nobody hurt you) by heroic_pants (5.3k, General) Warnings: none
Maddie is there on the day Buck is born, and the day his daughter is. She can't help but compare the two.
Reccer says: This is soooo lovely! Makes me weep, but in the best way, just a perfect little microcosm into how much Maddie loves her little brother(s)
19. lonely little love dog by little ghost (@ghostlandtoo) (24k, Mature) Warnings: None
When the 118 is closed for reconstruction after an earthquake, Buck is a floater for different stations around the city. He tries not to let it get to him. Much.
Reccer says: this is one of the most aching, lonely, devastating fics in the fandom. you really feel the lack of ties, buck slowly floating into the ether, and how important the firefam is, how much they love and support each other
20. a cold world for such a long life by Daisies_and_Briars (@cal_Daisies_and_Briars) (12.9k, Teen) Warnings: none
Eddie befriends Bobby's estranged older brother in a virtual support group for queer adults struggling to come out. The only problem? He has no idea that's who Charlie is.
Reccer says: The difficulty of estranged relationships, of trying to mend broken bridges, of coming out to the people you love. Of making up for the hurt you've caused, and growing and bonding in your most vulnerable moments.
21. oh, come when you're called by lesbianrobin (@lesbianrobin) (8.3k, Teen) Warnings: none
Chris wants his dad. He wants his bed. But he can't have those yet, and he and Dad never really text because if Dad’s not working they’re usually together or one of them is too busy to text, so texting Dad feels weird, but Buck… He can text Buck.
Reccer says: Chris spends his time in El Paso thinking about his relationship with his dad, and his dad's relationship with his parents.
22. bashed out by ProsperDemeter (37.3k, Teen) Warnings: Minor character death, implied referenced canon self harm and suicidal tendencies
Margaret dies while Eddie's in El Paso with Chris, and Buck's not initially inclined to tell him.
Reccer says: A deeply painful and cathartic look at difficult family relationships and grief
Is now a good time to say I think Buck has better deescalation skills than Eddie? it’s just that Eddie is less prone to reactivity and is a smooth talker so people put him in deescalation situations thinking he can handle it. And then he reveals himself as a crazy person. Frankly it’s a miracle he’s still alive.
no no you're absolutely correct and i think it's a broader tendency of how the world tends to view buck/eddie based on their initial impressions vs the way they actually are. like, eddie seems more levelheaded than buck at first glance, but that's mostly just a veneer for not only The Repression, but also a deep well of stubbornness that he does NOT compromise for anything. while he's good at presenting what HE thinks people want from him, he tends to be less good at actually reacting on a dime and shifting his stance based on what people ACTUALLY want from him, even when they're fairly straightforward about it. he also tends to fall back to snark and anger when he feels backed into a corner, which just feeds into his emotional loop.
in contrast buck tends to seem more volatile but that's more because he tends to talk his shit through out loud to people, in contrast to eddie. buck and eddie will both go through with insane suicidal plans but buck is much more likely to tell you about it first. buck also tends to be more sensitive to other peoples' emotions, for better AND for worse, and in the fight/flight/fawn framework his instinct is usually to fawn. he's less socialized in structured settings than eddie, but he was raised in the kind of volatile environment where he's learned to adapt very quickly and naturally to what he reads off of people, even though he's not necessarily very good at fitting himself in a specific role because he chafes against rigid structures.
#911#the thing that always strikes me with the kitchen fight is that buck says right at the beginning what he's mad about and how he feels#and eddie simply does not address it at all because it doesn't match the conflict he's already rehearsed in his head#buck meanwhile has the problem where he's very sensitive to the negative emotional undercurrents of a room but assumes they're on him#regardless of reality. and he gets reactive or involves himself in shit that's really not his business bc of that#but he's also like. capable of backing down and taking the l without it being a blow to his whole entire sense of self#eddie can't do that. every conflict is scorched earth with him <- @glorious-spoon
Yes these tags and whole post are so good!!
Even in the Lawsuit fight, Buck wants to talk about it, he wants Eddie to talk even if he’s still mad, but Eddie, extremely maturely lol, gets his very good digs in and then walks away, repeatedly. And even after the fight is over, Buck wants to apologize, to work through the issue, but Eddie keeps trying to brush it off (“we’re well past that.”). And on the surface, Eddie seems calm and in control, while Buck keeps pushing emphatically. But pretending situations aren’t happening or that you were hurt by someone’s actions isn’t maturity. It isn’t learning to deescalate; it’s just ignoring the problem altogether in hope that it goes away so long as it’s never brought up again. And of course, it doesn’t. It just gets pushed down until it explodes and makes everything worse.
we don't talk enough about the fact that if Eddie Diaz didn't drag his sore injured-in-a-car- accident ass all over New Mexico then Buck would've been dead
like. canonically
this is the direct he saved my life episode. I can make a ton of what-ifs to Eddie being shot where other people save him but there is literally either Buck dies or Eddie saves him in Mother's Boy. radically. nothing else could happen
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if you give a man the power to feed you you give a man the power to starve you.
so you’re on all the bank accounts. do you have an account of just your own that he can’t access? because he has one. do you have a way to get money into that account uncontested? because he does. do you have a credit card in only your name? he has one. do you alone qualify for a mortgage or car loan? he does. do you have employment history? he does.
have you considered that if he hurts you and you file a report or get medical attention, that will damage his career as a public figure, and his career is your only income? have you considered that unless you are 100% certain you want to divorce, it’s in your best interest to keep everything as quiet as you possibly can? have you considered that your husband plays a sport with high rates of CTE and drug and alcohol abuse which all correlate to rage and loss of impulse control? have you considered that at any time he can get traded and you’ll be off to utah in 24 hours? have you considered that your support system is a group of women in the same place as you who consider this all normal and even enviable? are you a good wife? are you a caring mother? are you a hot girlfriend? have you learned to find value in your commodification? if you broke up with your boyfriend and cut your hair and changed your name would your friends still be your friends? would your community still be your community? it all seems exciting and romantic and like a perfect story when you are 21 and he proposes on the beach. it seems like the way you want your life to go. now you’re 31 with 5 kids and no work history in a place you didn’t grow up surrounded only by women in your same situation.
and maybe nothing bad happens! maybe he loves you and treats you well. maybe he is kind and caring and a good partner and a good father and a good husband. maybe you are respected and valued.
i do think buck has been excluding himself from the eddiechris family dynamic, and it is so juicy because that is not how eddie sees it. in both 8x17 and 9x18, we see eddie and chris from buck's point of view. both times, buck is with pepa watching them from the outside. even in 9x13, he tells bonnie that chris needs eddie. he is willing to sacrifice himself to keep the two of them together (a bit of a redux of the texas arc if you think about it).
on the other side, we have eddie's pov in 9x11 and 9x14 where he views them as a family. he calls buck immediately when chris is missing. he keeps up the weekly family dinners. he brings chris to buck when buck is struggling. eddie's favorite place to be is with chris AND buck. he says this in s3, and we continue to see that in his pov in s9.
it's just so interesting to see their complete disconnect that has now been amplified by the texas of it all. buck knows he will never be more important than chris, but he doesn't realize how important he is to both of them. eddie desperately wants to choose them both. the idea of picking between them hurts him to the point that he slipped up in 8x09. he knows he will always put chris first. that's not a question. but if he truly got what he wanted, he'd never had to choose between chris and buck ever again.
and the best part is the only way to get them on the same page is to make them acknowledge they have been building a family together for years because they are in love. yay.
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Buck, thinking about what Josh said, turning to Eddie (who is still in his underwear) and says, "have you ever seen Glee?" and Eddie, who thinks Buck is trying to subtlety, casually, and slightly problematically ask him about his sexuality is like "Ha, a man can dance in his underwear without it being a Glee thing, Buck" but then thinking about Father Brian and joy and saying, "but--um, yeah, I don't know. Maybe I've glanced at a few episodes here and there, but it never felt like...something I had to look at you know? But like the--the message maybe seems okay--or something maybe I should give a shot? But like, that's a commitment, and I'd want to be sure--before I ruin the...regular tv watching schedule, that it's, you know, something I'd be interested in maybe because I mean I love Glee, I hope you know that, but historically, I haven't been so good watching things. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is...can you give me a little time to like--think about it or get into the space where I can be ready...to watch Glee?" and Buck is like "what the fuck is this show about??????"
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