Witchy Woman

bro WHERE is the love of my life this isn’t funny anymore

i never thought "i'm alive purely bc the universe is shit at pest control" would be my motivation of the day but damn this dude went hard

i asked my dad to make me a hot chocolate and he’s literally sawing something in the kitchen rn

Pisces season is all horrors and self pity and thinking why me and feeling like youre drowning and your eyes filling with tears and meditating on death and connecting with your parents again and relearning vulnerability and transforming and shedding the layers of your ego and being reborn

There is no slut shaming in this house, only slut encouragement

The span of human experience is so insane.

No no you don't understand! I want to watch this show/movie, read this book, listen to this podcast, etc.! But I must be in the right mindset and the exact head space to begin, or I just can't!

Girl if you don't simplify that fraction

I've started saying this to myself when I'm overthinking. Like girl.... get simplifying what is wrong with you

Love that for you diva

i like it when male waiters are cute… bring me some mozzarella sticks, pretty boy

dealing with my trauma? no thank u i'd rather turn it into kinks

My hottest trait is that I don't know what buccal fat is and I refuse to learn. Y'all are making shit up

"Ooh it's the trendiest new insecurity--" don't care

The older I get the more I'm convinced they're making up things to be insecure about in a lab. Like nobody is going to organically think of any of this some industry plant is just making tiktoks to sell you products and people believe it. Watch I can do it too Have you ever noticed the uh *throws a dart at a board* tendons in your *rolls dice* neck? That's bad now. Fuck off

Welcome to my blog I’m filled with sadness and I yearn to be kissed on the neck

Kevin McCarthy losing four five six consecutive Speaker of the House votes (so far) is legitimately one of the funniest things to ever happen. This is 2023's boat stuck in the Suez Canal. Something important has ceased working for the most hilarious possible reason and we are all watching desperate attempts to get it working again while secretly hoping it does not, and I think that's beautiful

You can only reblog this on the 3st of January

the 3st huh?

[ID: Screencaps from 30 Rock. Liz says, “What a year, huh?” and Jack says, “Lemon, it’s January 3rd.” End ID]

i hope this whole andrew tate situation will lead to more than just memes, but an actual discussion on sex tourism and the way western men move to poorer nonwestern countries, both because women and girls are more desperate and vulnerable & because our governments are much more shit abt doing anything at all abt sex crimes/the government and police themselves are often involved in sex trafficking, and because of the aspect of fetishizing and degrading eastern women (which western euro men are doing in their damn brothels to our women & girls as well). i hope it will lead to an awareness that he is faaar from the only western man to move to romania and the balkans for this, that this shit happens regularly to our women and girls here, that he's far from the only western man to move to a poorer nonwestern country to rape and traffick and enslave women and children. i hope maybe just maybe this will mean a bit more than just memes, and may show in the liberal sex work brainrot internet culture the darker underbelly of pornography and prostitution. our pain and suffering and exploitation isnt just a meme. i hope, at least.