we objectify men here, sir

blowjob? more like nojob! #unemployed

blowjob? more like job blows! #employed

ilya pulls his softening cock from shane's hole, watching it emerge, appreciating how shane stretches a little more around the widest point, how the tip hangs onto shane's rim for a moment before slipping over the edge and letting ilya fall heavy between his thighs. ilya sighs in satisfaction. he sits back on his heels and presses his thumbs to either side of shane's hole, which is glistening at the edge and gaping around the space ilya left behind. ilya hums low and says, "show me how good your hole made me feel, kotik" and shane moans, indistinct in that way his sounds always are after a hard fucking. ilya watches shane's hole clench weakly—then takes in the sight he started imagining the moment that fucker in the ball cap attempted to buy shane a drink at the bar earlier: ilya's release, white and thick and slow, drooling from shane's hole. tracking the curve of his gorgeous ass down to the hotel sheets. something in ilya's chest purrs happily. finally. the visible sign of commitment around shane's ring finger is normally enough to nip ilya's possessiveness in the bud. but sometimes, when even that fails to deter shane's most helpless of admirers, ilya craves a more visceral reminder of his claim. there's nothing like this. ilya swipes two fingers through the trail of white and shane's mouth opens without prompting. ilya shudders. he hovers his coated fingers above shane's lips, asks, "who is this, malysh" and slides them in. shane moans. tastes. around ilya, he says, "you."

I must not respond to stupid comments on my posts. Responding to stupid comments on my posts is the mind-killer. Responding to stupid comments on my posts is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will see the stupid comments on my posts. I will permit them to pass over me and through me. And when they have gone past I will block the idiots leaving stupid comments on my posts. When the idiots are gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

cant do the mutual first memory rb game because i genuinely cant remember anything. i dont know you were all my mutuals at birth. we were joined by the stars and by blogging

m,y first memory is that I Loved You and do still

shia labeouf DIE. brad pitt DIE. chris brown DIE. johnny depp DIE. cristiano ronaldo DIE. conor mcgregor DIE. die die die die die die die DIE. every single abuser DIE. if you support them DIE TWICE!

I MISS THE HEADPHONE JACK FUCK YOU!!!!!!

You are allowed to find things hot in theory while also never wanting to actually do them in real life btw. You can get off on whatever wild shit in your imagination and still prefer to be very vanilla in real life. Or not want to have sex at all in real life. You don't owe the universe anything in exchange for your dirty mind.

if there is one thing that tumblr has done to my texting it is the inclusion of arrows <- uses arrows basically anywhere <- loves arrows <- #myarrows