Not Today

Majnun sifted through the dust by the roadside, as though he had lost something. 

Someone asked him, “What are you looking for?” 

“I am looking for Layla.” 

“And you hope to find Layla here?” the stranger asked. 

Send an emoji below + three (3) different characters / muses that my muse must pick from! Some choices are considered ns / fw.

The way you feel when you kiss him for the first time. Like fire within your bones. Like your soul has returned to the water. Like every part of you that came from a dead star is alive again. - Nikita Gill

i’m always tired of seeing the cringiest sentence starters for smut so i’m back at it again kids. feel free to adjust sentences or specify who does the action. 

ACTIONS: 1. for one muse to give the other oral 2. to skinny dip with my muse 3. to shower with my muse 4. to take a hot bath with my muse 5. for sex in public 6. for sex in the car 7. to catch my muse naked 8. to undress my muse 9. for sparring to turn into sex 10. for an argument to turn into sex 11. for make up sex 12. for friends with benefits sex 13. to tie up my muse 14. to blindfold my muse 16. to make one muse watch the other masturbate 17. for a threesome (specify muses) 18. for one muse to wake the other by fingering them/giving a handjob 19. for one muse to deny the other orgasm 20. for angry sex  21. for break up sex 22. for sex after a near death experience  23. for after battle sex 24. for sex to get revenge on an ex 25. for one muse to give the other a lap dance or strip tease  26. to make my muse whimper 27. for one muse to take the other from behind 28. for sex against the wall 29. for sex on a table/counter/desk 30. for sex in a pool/hot tub 31. for one muse to choke the other 32. for rough sex  33. for our muses to try a new position 34. for our muses to try a new kink together 35. for one muse to use a toy on the other 36. for one muse to sit on the other’s face

“ the mind of the subject will struggle to create memories where none exist. “

“ are you going to just sit there? “

“ we had a deal, ____! “

“ i never find that as satisfying as i’d imagined. “

“ chin up, there’s always next time. “

“ why are you following me? “

“ this will end in blood, ____. then again, it always does with you, doesn’t it? it always ends in blood. “

“ whatever that was, it’s got nothing to do with the job at hand. “

“ are you real? “

“ i’m real enough. “

“ there’s no way out, trust me, i’ve looked. “

“ why did you come here? “

“ do you hear that? it’s music! “

“ come dance with me, ____! “

“ i don’t dance. “

“ if you’re going to be a sore loser, then i won’t do this again. “

“ you killed those people. i can’t believe you did that… they’re all dead… you killed those people! “

“ you’re a monster! “

“ you think people like that are just gonna let you walk away? you are an investment. and you are not safe until you are far away from here. “

“ i’ll do my best to keep you supplied with remedies, and if your wounds are deeper, then i’ll try to keep you on this side of the abyss. “

“ do you ever get used to it? the killing. “

“ you showed me–sometimes you have to do what’s necessary to survive. “

“ the less you know about me the better. “

“ there’s a world of difference between what we see, and what is. “

“ don’t get too comfortable with my company, ____. you are a means to an end, no more. “

“ i always thought that my little trick was a form of wish fulfillment. i got my wish. “

“ if you want to pretend that we’re purely innocents, then that’s your prerogative. “

“ how do you wash away the things that you’ve done? “

“ stop it, you don’t know what you’re doing! “

“ something tells me you’re not exactly what you appear. “

“ that is an oath you cannot keep. “

“ promise me—if it comes to it—you will not let ____ take me back. “

“ a mother who abandons their child doesn’t draw a lot of sympathy in my book. “

“ take a moment think about what you’re doing… “

“ will you open the door, or do i have to go in without you? “

“ what i do, i do for love! “

“ ____, listen to me. what you’ve been through… nobody in the world deserves that. “

“ we’re getting out of here, you got that? and you’re never going to have to look back. “

“ time rots everything, ____. even hope. “

“ no. it’s too late for me. “

“ i’ve got you, it’s okay. i’m gonna fix this. “

“ you saw what they turned me into. i will not allow that. “

“ is there where you start moralizing, ____? “

“ you forget that i know you. “

“ i won’t let you kill ____. “

“ really, ____? what are you going to do to stop me? “

“ we’re doing this together, or i’m doing it alone. either way, i need to know it’s been done. “

“ do you think… it’s possible to redeem the kinds of things that we’ve done? “

“ i won’t abandon you. “

“ i may be the one that strikes you down, ____, but you’ve always had a knack for self-destruction. “

“ some sins can’t be forgiven. “

“ stand back. i’m ending this. “

“ tell me. what am i? “

“ ____, everything i’ve done, i’ve done to keep you safe. “

“ this is the only way we’ll find out about the truth. “

“ there a million, million different worlds. all different and all similar. constants and variables. “

“ we don’t need to understand. it’ll happen all the same. “

“ you can wait as long as you want. eventually, you’ll give ____ what he/she wants. “

“ ____… you’re bleeding. “

starter for @noteveryonedies

Unlike most of the Jedi, who never left the Temple unless they were on a mission, Qui-Gon had made a point of thoroughly exploring most of Coruscant during his downtime.

The Jedi Master didn’t agree with his brethren who believed that Jedi should remain separate from the common people, that they ought to remain in their golden temple and never sully their robes by walking with the commoners - that they were superior than the people out there.

(Jedi existed to help people - they were people themselves, couldn’t they see? Their gift of being able to manipulate the Force didn’t make them better, it just gave them a responsibility over the galaxy. And how could they help people when they never bothered to get out, see what the world was like in peacetime, away from the stress of missions and danger?)

Over the years, Qui-Gon had tried what felt like a thousand pubs, cantinas, bars, inns - it if sold alcohol, he’d likely visited it at some point. That night, Qui-Gon didn’t feel like trying something new, he wanted the easy routine of somewhere he knew and loved, so he headed to the Orion Nebula. Located in the upper levels of Coruscant, it catered to a well-to-do clientele, but it wasn’t luxurious enough for the outrageously rich and the politicians, who never descended below the 5th level. 

Not wanting to advertise his rank, Qui-Gon had left his Jedi robes and tunics at the Temple, dressing as a civilian to avoid attention. If he entered the pub in full Jedi regalia, there would be much bowing on the barman’s part and ‘How might we help you, Master Jedi’ and the manager would come out to greet him and serve him personally.

Instead, in his dark trousers and leather jacket, hair up in a manbun, the Zabrak barman welcomed him with a wave and a cheerful “Hello Qui-Gon! Haven’t seen you in a while, you old dog!” that made Qui-Gon feel warm and relaxed, rather than a cross between a cop and a beast at the zoo.

“Hi Hugh,” he greeted back, settling down on a stool at the counter. “How are you?”

The yellow-skinned zabrak shrugged. “The night has been pretty slow so far.” A flirtatious smile. “Thanks for dropping by, you raise the quality of the eye candy.” 

Qui-Gon snorted, smiling. How Hugh could be such a flirt on the job was a mystery to him. “Give me a Corellian brandy, please.”

The barman eyerolled, evidently disgusted with patrons who wouldn’t play the game with him, and poured him a tumbler of golden-brown liqueur. The Jedi paid him and brought his glass to a free table near the window, nursing his brandy in peace.

Finally. A planet that River wasn’t familiar with. They were few and far between in this universe, but every once in a long while, she would find a pocket in a corner or behind a star that she didn’t know existed, and explore to her heart’s content. Sometimes the planets were abandoned - sometimes they were buzzing with culture and life - sometimes they were the seedy back alleys. Every option fueled her need to see and know everything that universe had to offer.  This planet in particular seemed to be a mixture - culture and life abound, but with plenty of seedy places to hide, as was common in most civilized worlds. River had just pulled off a remarkable heist - it wasn’t too terribly difficult, and the security was in dire need of an upgrade - but it was successful none the less. Time for place to relax, and preferably a bar where she couldn’t have to pay for a single one of her own drinks.  Orion Nebula. A bit on the nose in terms of a name, but one that had been recommended to her, so she was willing to give it a try. Armed with her favorite pair of jeans, black jacket, and pair of blood red heels, River Song strode into the bar as if she had been there a number of times before, her eyes automatically scanning every exit she could find. Three. There were three exits.  The bartender was already eyeing her before she could even make it to her stool. “Hypervodka, double...to start.” She gave the yellow alien a dazzling smile, placing her chin on her palm and leaning across the bar. “And then we’ll just see where the evening takes us, won’t we?” She leaned back to her stool with a wink, turning and looking out over the room. 

Please come talk to me about headcanons, ships and plots

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Please feel free to be yourself

So shipping her with River makes no sense. Because she loves guns. River has no mercy. She made a Daleks scream for help.

Thirteen wouldn’t be at all interested in someone like that. It’s out of character. She despises someone for even mentioning a gun…

IM LAUGHING. Anyway. Does that mean that shipping her with 13 makes no sense? Nah. You can ship 13 with Rose even if Rose likes guns. (If for any reason it would make no sense it would be because Rose is happy in another universe with her Doctor/Donna amalgam & wouldn’t waste her precious time waiting for a doctor that chucked her and then forced her to stay when she didn’t want to THREE TIMES. Guurl run away.) Anyway.

Let’s break this down, shall we?

Every Doctor professes to hate guns. There’s a point to this, it’s so that other options can be explored first. I say first, because sometimes the use of a gun is the only option, a la The End of Time, or The Time of Angels, or many many others…

It’s true he wants to discourage violence and that the Doctor tries their best to figure out a plan with the least amount of casualties, but sometimes he comes up with even deadlier means, like bombs, lasers, wipe-outs, total genocide, he even once told people they could kill all the natives from their planet, he also uses his own hands. You know the doctor has twisted people’s necks and stabbed others, right? LOL woops. they have.

So you’re picking on an early River? Stormcage River. Baby River. The one that’s still young and hasn’t been able to really kick out her previous conditioning. Because that takes time. She was conditioned since birth to be a weapon.

Still,

Does she shoot everyone without mercy, NO. She doesn’t. She almost never uses her gun, she killed a Dalek sure, but it shot the Doctor and would have continued to HUNT HER FAMILY DOWN until they were dead. Rory shot it too. Thanks. She’s also killed the Silents who kidnapped her mum and were planning on enslaving the whole of humanity. Like. Bad River! lol

AND NOW LETS GET TO THE GOOD PART. The Doctor likes that she carries a gun! saaay waaat? Like, OMG. How? WHy? SOUND THE ALARM. the doctor LIKES IT. whyyy? BECAUSE HE LOVES River Song. OH SHOOT OH SHOOT OH SHOOT (pun intended) He loves his River so much that his gun rule is waived. BYE.

BYE GUN RULE. There’s one exception and that’s River Song.

HOLY WOW. Never before has this happened.

Now, let’s turn to later-in-life River Song, she no longer carries a gun. SAY WHAT? Yeah, she’s been out of Stormcage and she’s grown into herself. She’s a professor, and now she uses her supercomputer

or a sonic trowel

Does she still like guns? Probably. Will she use one if she needs to? Without a doubt. But she’s also not the same person she was when she was young. She’s not. It called character development. And she threatens this peep wit her sonic trowel but he’s all ‘haha! ur threats are empty. it’s only sonic!’ oops. she been caught! run away rivah.

anyway.

FAST FORWARD to her final days, she’s not as wild anymore. she’s still confident and sexy af but she’s got responsibilities. she cares about her team of daves and anita. she got a team of companions she takes around exploring the universe! Now she’s got her good ‘ol supercomputer, a sonic (that 12 MADE FOR HER omg no one else has gotten a gift like that from Mr. Song, yeah that’s how it works) and – WAIT FOR IT – A SQUARENESS GUN. Oh waaaaat?

Yeah, it’s a squareness gun and the doctor’s face when he sees it? 

Y A READY KIDS???

HE A FAN. lmao. he’s like proper impressed. And then what does the Tenth Doctor do RIGHT AFTER THAT? TAKES HER HAND. Oh yeah, he takes her by the hand and they run down the aisle together.

UM. CAN I SAY FORESHADOWING? I mean if you’re jumping to cray conclusions so can I?

Anyway, my point is, River isn’t the same person she was. Her intersection with the Doctor softened her rough edges and her violent tendencies, just like the Doctor’s interactions with her made him a better man and friend, one that finally thought about the reprisals to his saviour complex.

To make my final point — 13 HAS ALREADY SAID that she loves her wife River Song.

did you miss this GEM?

The Thirteenth Doctor comic that’s in collaboration with Chris Chibnall CONFIRMS 13/River. That’s 13 speaking in the BOXES. She’s remembering an old adventure she had with River.

1) 13 STILL considers herself MARRIED dA HOuse

and 2) LOVES HER WIFE.

BECAUSE IT her beautiful green and gold time-wife with her vortex manipulator travelling life. There’s ONE constant in their story, dey married and no matter who the doctor is, they’ll always love each other.

(And you should listen to the BigFinish audios, River can be quite the merciful, kind, and compassionate blonde, along with all the other things she is.)

So to end my PBS Special: 13 and River ARE space wives. Like, the OG space wives. legit. they married yo. they’re not a hope. I don’t have to pretend they oncoming blondes. or hope they married in some universe. They are. In this one. They married AF. I mean WOW.