iamjess

Too depressed to be awake? Not depressed enough for a Depression Nap™? Welcome to Existential Crisis Wrapped in Blanket!

Raise your hand if you have ever felt personally victimized by this post

perf example of how uncomfortable boys are with women owning their own awesomeness. for many men, beauty, coolness, desirability are gifts they alone can bestow upon women. they get baffled, even aggressive when you show you’ve known you possess those things all along. 

lmao is this why we cut the radio down when we driving to help us see?

Exactly why.

(to the tune of uptown girl) uptown rat. he wears a very silly pointy hat

look I know the instructions were right there but you have no idea how much time I spent trying to sing this to the tune of uptown funk

r there no fireflies in europe??

british person: *sees 10 million fireflies* i litcherally con’t believe my eyes

if you put a group of people in an escape room, you WILL find out who has big dick energy

Speaking as someone who works as a game monitor at an escape room, THIS IS REAL AND CORRECT

I think we could all use this on our dashes.

Pure post

This is the kind of quality content I enjoy and demand

*pops a linkedin pill for some recreational job hunting*

The earth itself is trying to swallow Him up and get rid of him.

hey it’s me: a huge fan of attention and validation

You Are Going To Have So Much Success In 2018 (pass it on)

I nearly scrolled past, but I got nervous

Not risking this dude

Sorry guys

🅱️lease

I thought this said I was gonna have alot of piss