did you know? there’s some crazy shit on this app

i’ve been growing cherry tomato plants this summer and I don’t really know how to explain to you how much my sanity is tied to these plants thriving

the thing about grief is that you’ll just do shit but you’re gonna cry while doing it. watching tv? crying. texting a friend? tears. reading? alligator tears. they just spring up like they were always there and you go about your day. not because you want to, but because you have to. death teaches you about life

there are so many things about death and grief that they don’t tell you. like how they ship their the ashes and a post office worker has to hand you this box that’s very clearly what it is and then you know, you have to open that box. you just don’t realize all the little things you have to do when someone close to you dies. you know the big events, the big moments. but then there are the small things, the boxes. it feels like a deep breath out

I watched the south park ep. I haven’t watched south park since like 2007 and idk man that was something

I feel like I’m truly living in a dystopian story that I read in school. I genuinely always knew that we’d be living in sci fi ai hell as like, a society, I guess I just assumed it’d be after my time. like the downfall of civilization and the ai takeover really couldn’t wait another like 50 years? fucked up my dudes

my older sister died at the end of may and grief is really weird. my mom hired someone to do karaoke at the celebration of life we’re going to have and that’s on that

I did shrooms yesterday and talked to the pain in my stomach. it didn’t have much to say

tonight, two devils rage inside me: one, continuing to remake or make sequels to movies from the past just ruins the nostalgia and authenticity, and two: jackie chan in a karate kid movie? sign me up for 1 ticket please

I’m 3 weeks without weed and what i’ve learned is that food honestly isn’t THAT good tbh