it's just turning out that way

If someone is attempting to ask you questions about politics and you'd rather not engage, feign comprehensive ignorance of whatever they're trying to discuss. And I mean comprehensive; you are not playing the role of a potential convert who just hasn't heard of [issue] yet, but rather that of someone who does not know who the president is. If they name him, you've never heard of such a man in your life. You're not entirely sure what the Supreme Court is but you heard on a podcast or something that it got abolished by the mayor. Who's the mayor? Well, why would I know who the mayor is? Say things like "Who's to say" and "I thought that was from a movie."

If they're still incredulous as to the sincerity of your ignorance, become irate and defensive. Take umbrage with the very notion of common knowledge. Say things like "Look, dude, I don't gotta know every little thing, alright? You show me in the bible where it says it's illegal not to know things."

One would think that hearing a very distinct, clearly audible, reasonably loud and rapidly approaching sound of any kind would make any reasonable mammal turn to look at the direction of the sound, just purely by instinct?? If a deer heard something nearby go DING DING DING DING DING DING at its general direction, it would at least look up to see whether the source of the sound is a threat or not? Just a quick "is that something I need to be concerned about?" type of glance.

My nine-year-old neighbor: *crashes mom’s car into my yard*

You can move to scroll in another space (if you haven’t gotten out of bed yet, move to the couch; if you haven’t left the house yet, you can sit outside)

You can make your current space more pleasant to scroll in (if it’s not possible to move spaces, open a window or light a candle in your space)

You can scroll while taking care of your body (change into clean clothes, scroll while brushing your teeth or washing your face, scroll while drinking water or having a snack)

You can stay on social media but avoid depressing or mindless content (try searching for fun facts, hobbies you’re interested in, or good news)

Hard mode: try just making the switch on your phone from short-form to long-form content (from dozens of short posts to an article, a fanfic, or an ebook; from TikToks/Reels/Shorts to a interesting or fun YouTube video, podcast, audiobook, or film) — this can be the first step in transitioning out of being “stuck,” because you can, for example, go on a walk while listening to an audiobook, fold clothes while watching a video, etc.

Expert mode: Set a timer for one minute and put down your phone. Do anything else. (Take deep breaths, go get a drink, pick up a book or craft.) If you can do this, aspire to two or five minutes and keep increasing your time away from scrolling. (Use your phone to play music, a podcast, or an audiobook if this prevents you from picking it up again)