give me some of that nitro-9 you're not carrying

DOUG WAS MAC TONIGHT??

@cellarspider It’s your Blorbo from apparently everything?

He scream.

:V

Dragon babies!

“We came to rescue you, master.” “Good job.”

BIIIIIIITE

I wish I could open my jaw that far to scream in someone’s face

@elodieunderglass have some little guys

Don’t mind if I do!

Im glad they made up romance for stories and music but can you imagine how scary it would be to deal with all that for real

You are an unreliable narrator because your coping mechanisms for your deep-seated trauma forbid you from acknowledging the reality of the situation. I am an unreliable narrator because I sincerely have no idea what the fuck is going on.

Reblog and put in the tags if you can remember where you got the shirt you're currently wearing.

people really do have such short memories about lots of things but specifically gay sex was a crime in much of the usa less than 25 years ago like i remember it and gay marriage wasn’t legalized until 11 years ago and i was a grown woman waiting to get my hair cut when i found out. on a beautiful june day!!!

The crazy thing is, ninety-nine times out of a hundred, if you asked me on any given day "Would like to see a picture of some genitals?" my answer would be "😰 No, that's... No, thank you. I'm okay, actually." I have nothing but the utmost respect for people who do engage with the penis side of the internet, but personally, I've spent the better part of two decades doing all I can NOT to have pictures of dick and balls or sexy bikini babe buttcheeks blasted onto my retinas constantly. And yet... to be denied the penis? To have a jumped up pile of javascript tell me, a grown adult with an air fryer and an outstanding council tax bill, that I cannot be trusted to withstand the sight of a bare nipple unless I let it scan my drivers' license? I will move heaven and earth to see that fucking nipple, friend. I will walk a thousand miles barefoot on hot coals before I give you big brother bitches my passport number. A thousand miles through the desert with five VPNs just to press my face up against the glass and see the last uncensored picture of two My Little Pony Characters sixty-nining each other, and I don't even want! to look at it! But I will! I must! for the sake of our fucking democracy!

Matching your freak is beautiful and all but what you really need is a boy who's infatuated with your freak. Down bad for your freak. Deeply intrigued by your freak. Eager to see more of your freak. Supportive of your freak. Gets bricked up witnessing your freak, even.

StumbleUpon once sent me to a supercut of Lion King, Lion King 1 1/2, and Lion King II, the main edit being that the scenes of Lion King and Lion King 1 1/2 were interspersed so that they happened in the order they actually happened.

stumbleupon not existing anymore can be directly traced to a dramatic decline in my mental health, I could do a thesis on it.

bestie stumbleupon very much still exists its just called cloudhiker now. i use it all the time.

‎

I used to love take me to a useless website