Ooh, Shiny!

A character trait/dynamic that I'm endlessly compelled by is someone dealing with (or, like, failing to) being the child of people who were too busy being good people to have the time and attention to be good parents. This can be anywhere from 'was a public defender who gave a shit working 60 hour weeks with basically no vacations' to 'left their family behind to join the revolution/war effort and is now a universally beloved martyr-hero who saved/remade the world with their final breath' on the groundedness spectrum. The important thing is a viscerally felt but confused and ugly mess of longing, resentment, and guilt about feeling the resentment.

I’m just an easy mark for dumb pilot humor. Today the captain was like “we’re now at altitude, feel free to move around, my one rule is you must stay inside the plane” and I lost it. It’s funny because you would die a horrible death akin to standing unencumbered on Pluto

you're telling me they got trade at this union? 🤨

I won't ever get over the removal of headphone jacks, or micro sd slots, or cd drives. I won't. Fuck everyone and everything

god I'm such a slut for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce *decides it’s inaccurate to refer to myself as a slut in light of my minimal sexual activity* if The Enemy discovered my ardor for Chinese eggplant in garlic sauce, they would gain a significant strategic advantage

the author’s thinly veiled nothing #notwriting #straightupnotwritingit

Yeah sorry I can't come into work today. I accidentally heard Primadonna by Marina formerly of and the Diamonds. So I need the day to be a primadonna girl. Yeah it's going to be the whole day.

You know, as much as I'm a fan of horror and time loops, the absolute funniest interpretation I've seen of Dracula Daily is the one that goes that Jonathan Harker is fine and healthy and happy, he's just telling this story to his grandkids. Again. Because they love hearing the Vampire Story.

Ordering a gin and yonic at the H.R. Giger bar and grill

Are there any fantasy novels with a cartographer/geographer as the protagonist? Seems like a ripe subject given the heavy weight placed on maps by both authors and fans, something you could either play straight (quest for knowledge and empirical understanding of the world) or not ("Why is this mountain range a 200-mile straight line? What the fuck is wrong with this drainage basin? How is this island larger south-to-north than north-to-south?!")