a deer is like a forest horse if you think about it
(nodding sagely and correcting the whiteboard with a very squeaky marker) a deer is like a forest whale if you think about it
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@moonbeam-llama
a deer is like a forest horse if you think about it
(nodding sagely and correcting the whiteboard with a very squeaky marker) a deer is like a forest whale if you think about it

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American Art Nouveau Plique a Jour Brooch
i went to bed last night with a skin tag under my eye which I'd been planning on asking the dermatologist to remove when I am there in a couple weeks.
I woke up with blood all over my face and hand and no skin tag
I apparently did myself a minor surgery in my sleep.
the year is 2035. the new beauty standard is for women to cut their ears off, as ears are a masculine trait which make the face look too big and hearing isnt necessary as it doesnt align with being demure. evil feminists say perhaps this is unnecessary and ears are natural. women are agressively proclaiming they are cutting their ears off due to sensory issues

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I scrolled past this without second thought. Paused. Thought, wait, I've never seen a crane on the road. Scrolled back up. No answers. Typed this response, then noticed the book's author. What a whirlwind
Basically they bring it in piece by piece and assemble it on-site, using a smaller mobile crane (trucks with crane attachments) and once the crane itself is assembled, the top part can use hydraulics to climb up and down its own mast, so it builds itself taller like this
There is however no explanation for BJ Nomnom
That is genuinely fascinating, thank you!
the crane ouroboros
He has more.
Some yaâll who are younger need to google Frank Serpico and read about his time in the NYPD and what the cops did to him and attempted to do to him up until the late 90â˛s. He literally had to go into hiding in Italy and Switzerland and multiple times people tried to kill him. He only came back to America after the mafia (who hated the NYPD a lot, obviously) said âyouâre under our protection.â
Damn, NYPD is so bad, Mafia started protecting good cops
I was a police officer for nearly ten years and I was a bastard. We all were.
đReally really good article by the way. Feels like a good piece to show to folks you know who are still on the fence about things like police or prison abolition. Plus the pseudonym the author uses is hysterical, and he's really quite a good writer.
extremely good article, please read it. at the very least read the "how to be a bastard" section, it outlines a lot of the ways cops will try to trick you
fonts will be named shit like viscera antique, 16 bit dreams, doctor's orders, bingo condensed, googly, wish you were here
for your consideration
Was reminded of my old monster Cinderella x Snow White story and felt like redesigning them a bit

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wish $20 was $20 again.... it's literally $5. if ur fucking lucky
My daughter says a dog is paralyzed "from the waist down" so I'm like where is a dog's waist? She says "where they'd wear pants." So we all drew our idea of how a dog would wear pants if they wore pants. She was not happy.
The top one on the left is hers - apparently the only way a dog would wear pants.
This phrase has already entered my vocabulary re: media criticism where like. The viewer has a concrete view of what they expect a story to be based on the tropes and cliches they're used to seeing together, and when that doesn't happen, they judge it as a failed depiction of what they assumed it was going to be instead of judging it as what it actually is.
"This show is problematic because the hero didn't kill the villain at the end": When does he steal the bread?
"These two characters who were close friends throughout the series don't kiss at the end! What the fuck?": When does he steal the bread?
"This feels like it's missing a conclusion! Like, the protagonist does bad stuff and because of a critical decision he makes as a result of his major character flaws, meets tragedy in the end! Where's the part where he learns better and brings is love back from the dead and becomes a good guy and gets a happy ending?": When does he steal the fucking bread??
I heard this out as "When criticizing something, you must judge it for what it is, not what it isn't"
#this is why so many of us urge people to get a wider diet of stories
i don't yell at my kids. I grew up being yelled at and I hate it. It took time to learn not to when they were tiny but I did it and I no longer count the days. Anyway I yelled at them yesterday for the first time in like 5 years. They were roughhousing and bulldozed into me in the kitchen. Anyway pics of my ankle under the cut (because it's bruised and swollen all to hell and it looks gross) . Then I felt bad and apologized multiple times :/

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tbh Iâve always found it very funny that Elrond is like âthereâs no point bringing Glorfindel on the quest, even though heâs a balrog-slayer. You wonât need balrog-slayersâ and then thirty pages later they run into a balrog
#and they couldâve really benefited from having a glow in the dark elf in moria (via @emyn-arnens)
obsessed by the implication that glorfindel is bioluminescent
#most elves arenât #just glorfindel #dwarves on the other hand ARE bioluminescent #but itâs in a spectrum that elves and men and orcs canât see in #hobbits can see in that spectrum fine #for better mushroom hunting #but they think itâs rude to point out that one of their party members is glowing #and so the dwarves have no idea the hobbits notice (via @mandaloriandy)
The first night Bilbo camped with the company he very nearly said something about it, but, having no idea what dwarves are and thinking it might be rude, he kept the observation to himself and decided that dwarves must be some kind of fungus. It improved his estimation of them most incredibly, and was, in fact, one of the observations he was most keen to pass on when he got back, seeing as howâeven if it didnât quite make him respectable, per seâit at least provided a valuable new addition to hobbitsâ mushroom-lore, which no one (not even a certain few silver-spoon possessing relatives) could fault him for.
#anyways itâs common knowledge in the shire that dwarves are actually just a kind of mushroom#but no one says anything#because they think (seeing as how the dwarves havenât brought it up themselves) it would be rude (via @willowcrowned)
My partner, reading this over my shoulder: âIt never ceases to amaze me when Tolkein fans write meta that goes off in really bizarre directionsâ
Me: âThese books are 70 years old, everything normal to say about them has been said; if youâre gonna say anything new about it, itâs gonna have to be weirdâ
Realistically, a household the size of Wayne Manor needs more than just a butler, and while Bruce might imagine he can keep his proclivities secret from his own domestic staff, Alfred certainly harbours no such illusions. I've gotta wonder what the orientation lecture he's worked out looks like. Like, of course they're going to be extensively vetted before they ever set foot on the premises, but at some point during the onboarding process the subject of the Batcave has gotta come up â I just wanna know how Alfred broaches that.
serious answer: itâs the sex dungeon, and everyone knows itâs the sex dungeon, and alfred is extremely good at getting across the point, in his Very Proper Butler Accent, that domestic staff donât get to go anywhere near the sex dungeon EVEN WITH an airtight nda contract because someone at some point tried to leak pics to the gossip mags and alfred had to murder them and it was annoying. alfred takes care of the sex dungeon himself. if you find a secret passage on accident you stop and immediately go tell alfred, so he can close the security hole, because if you follow the secret passage yourself and end up in the sex dungeon, he murders you. also if you ever so much as say the words âsex dungeonâ he murders you.
funny answer: everyone knows the batcave is underneath the sex dungeon because everyone knows bruce wayne is batmanâs sugar daddy.
Welcome. Now, given your history in working with, well, the family you worked with before, I'm sure you are used to certain protocols. Since you've also worked with MI6, you know a thing or two about secrecy.
Delightful.
We've already addressed the other protocols, but this is critical. This is the entrance to his secret basement. Do not enter the secret doorway or the secret stairway. Yes, we know it's there. But for him, we do not know it is there. He needs it to be a secret. It's our job to ensure he feels his needs are respected, hmmm? Every gentleman has his own private hideaway, his is just more, elaborate that most. Don't acknowledge it, don't clean it and never, never talk about it. I tend to the upkeep of that space, out of respect for him and out of respect for you. There are some things a gentleman needs to keep to just himself, and his butler, of course.
Now, this glass case...