By the Might of Thor

friendly reminder that keeping plants in your house without their permission is slavery and kidnapping :)

I honestly can not tell what’s serious anymore on this godforsaken website.

A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad

#this is team skull

The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying “You can pet me, but don’t pick me up!” One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him “did you see the sign?” He said “yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don’t pet them!” Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said “I didn’t read it right did I?” And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said “its ok, i know you’ve got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits” And I still haven’t gotten over that interaction.

I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He’s a little thing tbh we call him short and long. So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like “hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your’s is so small I think it’s a good place to start.” Ofc I was like “yes he’s very friendly!” So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks “can I pick him up?” And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two’s lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes “hey man, it’s okay just relax I’d never let anything hurt you. He’s a good boy.” I’ll never forget it ever bc I know that man looked at me (5'3 , glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like ‘ah yes the two least intimidating living things I’ve seen in Boston all day he’ll feel relaxed around them’ and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy

A good post, pure.

Another adorable story has been added.

small boob privilege is so real like…. bralettes… underboob tattoos… going braless?? not looking hyper sexual at all times ???? running comfortably? i could go on

YAS finally someone said this

Girls with big boobs are jealous of the girls with small chests. Girls with little titties always want bigger ones. There’s no middle ground! Me, I love ALL boobs, regardless of size!  They’re all fun, they’re all gorgeous, and I can’t get enough of them!  Please, feel free to share!

everyone please pray for this man he’s so out of his mind he hallucinated the part Where I Asked :/ so sad

Yeah our house is on fire but have we considered giving the fire a chance and seeing what it does first before we put it out?

Before we call 911 I want the wood floor to apologize for being so flammable and let the healing begin because it really hurts the arsonist when you call him an arsonist.

Look, I know none of us wanted this fire in the first place, but it’s here now, so can we please just try and make the best of it and be respectful?

hey everyone, lets talk about how syphilis didnt appear in Europe till after Christopher Columbus came back from America but didnt exist in people from the Americas either until then. lets talk about how the only animals syphilis was found in before then were llamas.

no im not kidding we need to talk about this

#are you implying what i think you are

In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue, fucked a llama and then fucked you.

we always talk about the bees knees but what about the bee’s needs. have you ever thought about that ? No. because you only think about yourself

i’ve lost count of how many times i’ve reblogged this

doggles

tall people: if we are walking together please take into consideration my tiny legs. i cant keep up with you. please think of my tiny legs i dont want to be jogging to keep up with your leisurely stroll you TITANS

Just get a pair of roller skates and hang on to my sleeve, we don’t have all day.

supercalifraglisticexistentialcrisis

I actually can’t cope with this

oh my godddddddddddddd

Ms. Tonitini is the mom I strive to be

@ambpersand

ultimate relationship goals are going camping together to watch the stars wrapped up in a bunch of blankets and just enjoy this earth together agh