the FATEST CATFISH in the gay pond

Thinking about how Anakin canonically both touched grass and got laid and was still Like That.

you must remember that while you are your mother’s daughter as well as your father’s daughter you are also a secret third thing beyond the reflex of memory and that third thing is entirely up to you

what they don't tell you is that after you turn 30 you have ocasional but powerful bouts of home ownership fever, which is like baby fever but instead of randomly really wanting a baby you go on zillow and look at modest properties you will nonetheless never be able to afford. and then it passes and you're like wtf was that about. yay time for another $6 coffee to stave off the dread

sorry for bitching and whining. unfortunately i have to or else ill start killing and eating people instead

don’t understand where people get the energy to be an active participant in their own lives. the days just happen to me for real

don’t kill yourself because the internet is going to be really funny when Elon gets assassinated

We need to embrace the fact that the tumblr userbase is aging. What’s everybody’s favorite kitchen appliance?

okay guys we've all had a lot of fun with the whole "five day work week" thing but let's stop joking around. we only need three. four at the absolute maximum

Happiness Will Come To You.

when tho

When You Least Expect It. Probably Late March

reblog for happiness to come for you in late march!

I am the only survivor on this post REBLOG FOR HAPPINESS IN LATE MARCH AND TO SURVIVE THE MARCH OF TIME!!!!

the secret to life is always having something to look forward to

to anyone saying there's nothing to look forward to, I'm not saying it has to be anything spectacular or huge. it could just be a song or a book that will release in a few days, a tv show, anything!! no matter how small it seems it can keep us going

does anyone know if we have fun tomorrow?

we've got abysmal dogshit tomorrow

I feel like starting an urban legend about a demon that kills you if you don't have headphones on when browsing tiktok in public