going for long walks alone is probably the closest thing we have to a cure for the human condition

“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?

please hurry up in reblogging this I wanna jorts it before someone puts it in one of those heartwarming tiktok slideshows

i was like 'what could jorts it possibly mean' but as with many things clicking the original post immediately clarified the situation

if you adopt two dogs who are littermates, they will team up on you to undermine your authority. if you adopt two cats that are littermates, they will constantly try to narc on each other to you

dont worry everyone i will save us all at some point

has anyone considered that it was probably her house too. where else was she supposed to put her chintz?

all movies are for children because the moving image is inherently juvenile. to be entertained by it even moreso

Random tumblr blog roleplays as a philosopher. Shocks the masses by using big words just to say they think theyre better than you because you watch movies. WHHAAAAT?

thats right

the biggest word in this post is “entertained”

*leaves theatre* wow what a great show my favourite bit was how it fundamentally changed me as a person forever

listen i consider myself an empathic person but after a certain point i get sick of other people’s problems. my friend is always talking about how the jewel-eyed skull on their mantlepiece is tormenting them w its sinister beauty and im over it. like dude i don’t want to talk about this anymore. get rid of the fucking skull

you’ are biased against my skull

i’m not having this argument again man

My Chemical Romance is what they would call Breaking Bad if it were a yaoi manga

i love how alcohol bottles dont have the nutritional facts on it like fuck you just drink it

whenever I tell a story I feel like Uncle Colm from Derry Girls

[pointing at the moon] hey man can you put that thing on a leash?