delightful, in a queer sort of way

This one time he gets picked up from shift and this GORGEOUS classic car (leather seats, gleaming, the whole shebang) pulls up, he just waves and hops in but nobody can see the driver through the tinted windows ?? VERY MYSTERIOUS.

Then one night the whole group is out drinking and Buck gets sloppy, sleepy, cuddly drunk. Papa bear/designated driver Bobby offers to drive everyone home so they pile together into his truck. Buck is half passed out on Chim’s shoulder as he gives directions. They’re all expecting something kinda shabby, a share house with like six other dudes in a meh neighbourhood. But Buck directs them somewhere NICE. Manicured lawns and big houses. “Buck, are you sure this is the right place ???” And Buck’s just nodding and humming, “mmm-hmm.” As the houses they pass get bigger and more elaborate.

The one they finally pull into is beautiful, not ostentatious but clearly expensive and well maintained, that classic car in the drive. The front door is illuminated and as they pull up it opens. This guy steps out - older, built af, reading glasses perched on a very handsome face. He’s in sleepwear and house slippers and he’s got a slightly worried expression on his face.

“Evan?”

For a second the very drunk Hen and Chim are like ‘who the fuck is Evan??’ but then Buck is literally crawling over them to get out of the car and directly into the man’s arms. He’s murmuring a happy, “tommytommytommy” as Tommy easily scoops him right up, big hands on his thighs as he wraps his gangly limbs around his body and tucks his face into Tommy’s neck.

There’s absolute dead silence for a minute as everyone processes this situation.

Finally Bobby clears his throat and says, “Uh, I assume this one belongs to you?”

For his part, Tommy just nods, presses a kiss into Buck’s (floppy, unruly) curls and turns a wry smile on the group. “Thanks for getting him home, I really appreciate it.”

Chim unfreezes long enough to give a strangled, ‘no problem?’ as they all watch Buck burrow even further into Tommy’s arms, giving a happy little wiggle and sigh of contentment when Tommy wraps him up even tighter.

They’re all still staring as this burly, gorgeous older guy continues holding Buck (who’s gangly and about half the size of 30yr old Buck but definitely still a grown man) like it’s nothing. Tommy rubs a huge hand down Buck’s spine and murmurs, “Baby, where is your jacket? Cmon, let’s get you inside.”

And he gives the group another nod before turning to go into the beautiful house, Buck still clinging to him contentedly.

And this kid did not have a lot of friends. His teachers thought he wasn't very smart because he made everything about hockey. And they dismissed him when he struggled with math and reading. "if you could just put some of your hockey energy into school, then maybe you would get better." His classmates laughed at the hockey themed valentines day cards him and his mom had to hand make because nowhere was selling hockey themed valentines day cards. And they laugh at him when he repeats the same thing over and over about "getting pucks deep, pucks deep, pucks deep." When he would play all by himself on the yard pretending he was skating, picking up any big stick he could find on the ground, they'd push him around. "Can we play? We'll be defenders" and ram him and take his stick. And he'd just go through all the penalties they would have just gotten over and over again until he can calm down. He celebrated every birthday at the ice rink in his full hockey gear even though he didn't really have classmates showing up. Not for lack of invite.

And his parents try to steer him away from it. They try and watch new sports, they try and get him to watch kids shows, get into things kids his age like, but all he wants to do is watch reruns of the metros cup wins. Wants to wear his hat backwards with his black shirt because that's how Shane looks in the interviews. Memorizes the answers he gives in french even though this kid never learned french in school. And its useless. This kid is hooked and they just kinda have to ride this wave.

So when the announcement comes for the Game Changers camp, these parents do absolutely everything to get him there. They don't care what it takes, this is like a light for all of them really in the midst of all the bullying at school and the meltdowns at home and the obsessive routines that fall apart if even one thing is out of place.

And they explain to the camp that their boy might have a hard time. Might need some time to adjust. That he struggles with math, and reading, and can get caught up in all the rules sometimes. Preemptively trying to say "he's not a bad kid. he's trying his best."

So at the end of the first day, his parents are prepared for a meltdown. Its new, its a lot of kids, the rink can get loud and cold, and he doesn't always do well with transitioning out of hockey. He's hard to pull off the ice at home.

And they can see some upset under the surface when they arrive. He clearly doesn't want to go home. Thats no surprise.

What is a surprise is the way Shane gets down on one knee next to where the boy is sitting upset on the ground. He doesn't move to touch him. He just gets down and the two of them softly have a chat. The boy is tugging on his hair and nodding at what Shane says. And eventually he stands and the parents walk over to them.

"You must be the parents. Its good to meet you," Shane says softly. "I was just going over some things about tomorrow. So that way he would know the schedule."

And they can see their son isn't quite happy, still clearly exhausted. He'll nap in the car and be grumpy at dinner. But he is much more regulated than they expected him to be.

"And, I was telling him about my schedule when I go home. About getting some quite time, making sure I can decompress. I think that's what all good hockey players need, right buddy?"

"Right buddy," he repeats.

Thank you for the card you sent for my birthday. It was very nice. I have never had a hockey birthday card before, even though I have looked. I hope your birthday in August is very “n-Ice” too. My parents say that you might be too busy to have the hockey camp this year. I thought they must be wrong, because you said to me routine is very important to being a good hockey player, and you are the best hockey player, and also you promised there would be a slot for me at camp next year and you have always kept your promises to me, like that you would remember my birthday and that it gets better when you have teammates and it has.

My parents explained that you have had a very hard year, and that you might need extra time to rest from that, and you have said that it's very important that hockey players rest after doing hard things.

Please do not worry about your promise if you have to close the hockey camp. I hope you get lots of rest after your hard year. My parents have also said that we have to be careful about what TV we watch about you because some people are saying things that are not nice and we shouldn't listen to them.

People have said a lot of things about me that are not nice. When this happens, what helps most is to get on the ice and skate with people who are nice like my parents and my teammates. You should make sure you take time to skate with your parents and with Ilya Rosanov.

It also helps to hear people say nice things about you, so I want to say some nice things about you. You are my favorite hockey player and your shot is really good and so is your backchecking. You are also Tanner and Marty's favorite hockey player, even though Marty isn't supposed to like Centaurs players because his family's team is Toronto.

I don't know if Ilya Rosanov is a good hockey player, but Evan is a Raiders fans and he says he's really good and a playmaker and also really funny and also could you please tell Ilya Rosanov that from him.

Thank you again for the birthday card. Do not worry about writing me back. I hope you feel better soon.

it is called a fish fighting belt/harness.

BEHOLD.

HARNESSES AND LEVERS, ALL AS TOUGH AS YOU COULD WISH

WHEN YOU'RE ON A BOAT, YOU CAN'T JUST BRACE AGAINST A ROCK

“Oh no, you have nothing– nothing to apologise for. Look at me. Look at me. .... Look at me. I'm sorry that I made you feel like you couldn't tell me. Hey... I am so, so proud of you. Okay? Please forgive me.”

ilya FURIOUS about this entire situation but also rationalizing that if he can teach this other man to eat rose out properly, then she will be less likely to try and get shane back in the future (she wouldn't anyway, ilya, you are a ridiculous person), so fine. get out paper and pencil and welcome to Eating Pussy 101 with Professor Ilya Rozanov.

hilariously this does in fact set off shane's competence kink to witness, so he has to consciously remember to keep himself in this conversation because he does want his good friend to have good sex.

THANK YOU FOR SOLVING THE PUZZLE I WAS FACING OF HOW TO MAKE THIS ROSELANA

rose following up later and just being like, "yeah, the tips helped a lot, but idk maybe i just need to dip my toes in a wider pool lol" and she's Kind Of joking but ilya is just !! 💡 !!! one moment, let him get in touch with a specialist.

and he calls sveta and is just, "sveta, are you potentially interested in sleeping with beautiful hollywood star rose landry? if interested, i need you to blow her mind in bed to save my marriage."

and svetlana is just, "i don't believe the second half of that statement, but yeah i'm into the first part lmk."

and now ilya has a husband who has discovered a new kink, a best friend who owes him for setting her up with a hot hollywood celebrity, and his husband's ex sexually satisfied and OFF the fucking market.