:)

my undertale theory is that when sans shook frisk's hand there was no whoopy cushion and he ripped ass loud as fuck

I hear being kind is punk but is it ska? Is being kind ska? I don't care about being kind unless it's ska.

Come to the library. We will laminate your penis for free.

happy 10 year anniversary to “fuck shit titties it’s friends at the table”

Dogs serve as a kind of virtue eater for Americans to pour all of their kindness into without the risk of improving society or being nice to someone with any agency

in zis sense, we arr all little timmy, down hiz well

all roads lead to road dude. and when in road do as the rodents do.

its actually easy to de-enshittify your digital experience all you need to do is install this browser extension and this browser extension and this browser extension and input this custom script into the advanced box and go into your system settings and reconfigure all these options you didnt know existed and change your entire workflow and switch to this alternative operating system and this alternative web browser and this alternative chat client and this alternative word processor and this alternative- sorry that one turned out to be malware delete that one okay now double check your task manager for unwanted background processes and element block these ads and invest in a good VPN and append all your searches with AI blocking keywords and wait a few years until everything you just did becomes shitty too so you can do it all over again okay kitten. its literally that easy.

does anyone else have parents who suck in objectively funny ways

im going through some bullshit someones homestuck fankid would experience

i think if i were a jedi i would make it my life mission to make yoda angry. i would give anything to hear his little goblin voice mutter the words “thin fucking ice, you are on” and click his little cane on the ground. i would do anything. kick him as im walking and be like “oh sorry didnt see you there.” go with him to the market and try to buy him for four credits and say “oh my bad i thought you were a head of cabbage.” raise all the chairs in the jedi temple just an inch. catch him while he’s sleeping and paint his little nails and then be like “odd that someone caught you slippin master yoda. wonder who could have done that.” leave crumbs in his seat in the jedi council. i mean i would do anything

There are US Senators dying who have never died before