Mimzy

Yes yes yes this scene thank you for the tag, heehehehe

It’s funny because this scene must be based on the memoir Special Agent by Candis DeLong. In it she describes being out looking at clothes at a department store on lunch break with another female agent and overhearing a conversation between a man and a woman in which he says he’s an FBI agent. They peer around some clothes racks thinking that they’re going to see one of their fellow agents trying to get a date, and when they don’t recognize the guy they go over and pretend to be interested in the big strong FBI agent themselves and ask to see his badge. The guy actually pulled out a fake badge, whereupon they said “Huh, that doesn’t look anything like ours…”, produced their own badges and arrested him for impersonating an FBI agent. (I remember this bit from a 25 year old book because I actually stole it myself for a fic)

Exquisite. Glorious. 10/10 thank you for sharing.

In case you need a comfort watch and because Youtube search nowadays sucks rancid farts, I remind you of the Princess Bride Home Movie from the lockdown, starring everybody

hey bestie i think ur post might be charmed 'cause you aren't gonna fuckin believe what happened today

always funny to remember darth vader is anakin skywalker. the adrenaline junkie chucklefuck who used to dive head first out of speeders and built a pod racer in his yard when he was like six is now upper-middle management for the evil empire. half of his appearances in the original trilogy are Meetings. vader spends like 80% of his time dealing with bureaucratic bullshit. status updates. team meetings. holo-Zooms. budget rundowns. anakin betrayed the jedi and caused the fall of the republic and his punishment is being CC'd on every email forever. and you know what. he would hate that. the punishment fits the criminal

The funniest part of A New Hope is that Luke Skywalker is a 19 year old who has not locked in yet and plays with toys and sleeps in his childhood bedroom at his aunt and uncle’s house and Leia Organa is a 19 year old with a mission to save the galaxy from fascism. Luke has never left his hometown, Leia just watched her planet be blown up. He’s peeved his uncle is asking him to do his chores, she’s imprisoned for resisting the government. You relate to them both but they’re on complete opposite sides of the 19 year old life stage spectrum.

Also Luke is clearly very lonely after his crush and best friend, Biggs, went away to college

Yes! Some people have misinterpreted this as me insinuating Luke is a wimp but he’s just in a very transitional life phase that is focused on growing and maturing. His friends are growing up and moving on, he’s anxious to join them but isn’t quite ready. He has ambition and goals but he just isn’t in a place where he is able to pursue those goals, he is immature and that isn’t a bad thing. 19 year olds SHOULD be able to ponder their place in the world and which direction they want their life to take. Leia has been in the public eye her entire life, she is a princess, she has been primed for greatness and she has been shouldered with so much responsibility. Luke is just his aunt and uncle’s nephew, they love him and don’t want him to leave, he’s trying to decide what to do.

He’s like a Midwest farm boy who is dreaming of the big city and she is like an old money New England heiress who has been told since birth she will follow her father’s career path into politics and has been sent to the most competitive schools and enrolled in the most rigorous extracurriculars.

Luke is the protagonist at the start of a coming-of-age plotline while Leia is in the 3rd season finale of her failed revolution plan when A New Hope takes place and you can fight me on this.

and Han Solo owes a slug drug money

anyway the thing about Ratthi and Gurathin is that I could get behind them as a Thing but literally the only version that works for me is Gurathin being So Fucking Mad that he could bite through METAL because it's sooooo stupid that he did the Most Basic Thing imaginable and got a stupid lil crush on the Hot Nice Guy from work that everybody wants to fuck. oooooh wow Gurathin that guy is hot and nice and now you want to touch his junk about it??? groundbreaking. inspiring. idiot. obviously he'll be taking this to his grave. and meanwhile Ratthi's acting like the girl from a horse girl movie. going pspsps with lil sugar cubes. trying to lure Gurathin to his polycule board game night.

Ratthi isn't even doing it with Intent he just thinks Gurathin needs more enrichment but every time he's like oh hey wanna get a smoothie after work :) no pressure :) only if you're up for that haha :) Gurathin's going oh fuuuuuck he's trying to seduce me 🤬

Murderbot isn't adding anything incorrect for the record it's just stressing Gurathin out with extra info. sliding in with shit like "you forgot to note that Variables Three and Seven have recently become romantic partners" and Gurathin's like "bullshit, they're both dating Variable Four but they're not involved with each other" and Murderbot goes "incorrect. they went on their first date this weekend. Ratthi is very excited for them and told me about it this morning. it was agony." and then Gurathin throws up

The fact that Vader is the voice of reason here is fucking bananas. How batshit you have to be to have Darth “You know what will solve this problem? Child murder ” Vader go “this guys nuts.”

The window visual did me in I’m wheezing

NO

WELP

I haven’t seen this in years and yet it is burned into my memory forever.

This is on the short list of Eternal Reblog because it’s fucking legendary.

An honourable candidate for the @hellsite-hall-of-fame

like to charge, reblog to cast.

OP, this is genuinely a masterpiece, three poems in one, moving and well crafted. Please tell me you have submitted it to at least some poetry contests, and if not, please do so.