Hey

do it for the faggots who never got to btw

so im having a piss in the bathroom (where its supposed to go…) and these vaping godless wenches think the sound of my tinkle warrants a giggle. does anyone know how to get me in contact with some powerful etsy witches for a cheap and swift vengeance

I thought we were good as gravy, but you just wanted to get your pey wet

[doesn't understand jacking off] and I'm supposed to... touch my penis? [shaking my head and smiling, murmuring to myself] touching my own penis... [chuckles] what will they come up with next

throwing lit matches at preschoolers is punk

no way your narrow ass cloaca laid this egg

that’s really great man

seeing this post without the monologue is like seeing a single detached human arm lying on the sidewalk

millions of american soldiers die every year trying to rocket jump. thankfully their lives are worthless

STOP BACKING INTO PARKING SPACES SHE'S NOT GOING TO FUCK YOU