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@tequilaxmockingbird08
Send pics boys

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Mobster, pointing a gun at my head: Any last words kid
Me: I actually like to use women's deodorant because the stuff for men dries out my skin and smells like harsh chemicals
*BANG*
(3 hours later, at Walmart)
(Mobster holding Dove Advance Care in the deodorant aisle)
Hmm...
This Canada day let's celebrate the Hudson's Bay Company once owning 5% of the earth's total landmass now being relegated to a shitty kiosk in select Canadian Tire locations. Good riddance.
tumblr is great bc its like a diary where I can take other peoples diary entries and glue them into my own diary

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learning about 4 am
my jaw hit the ground
Let's just cuddle naked and if it slips in, it slips in
some people like to get mad at disability benefits because they think its unfair people who dont work get a payout from the government while they have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week. but if you tell them "yeah that sucks i think you should also get a universal allowance and not have to work 50 hours at the human suffering factory every week" thats apparently the wrong answer.
me getting some Irish dick: oh please donât stop
him: aye ya loike that do ya? Wud ya loike if ah went harder? Wud ya loike that ya little sloot?
me: uhâŚ. yâŚyeahâŚ.
him: whut was that?
me: uh⌠ayeâŚ.
him:
I actually want to kill myself
i wish i could get this tattooed on me

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what if it was called magic the slathering and it was about lotions and ointments
Just a silly crossover that wouldn't leave my mind
1 hour limit smash together with mspaint and a mouse
Hello?? Can anyone hear me???
Clark Kent gaslighting Lois Lane into believing heâs not Superman.
Nintendo Power issue 113 (October 1998)
To everyone saying itâs not real:
This post is how I've learned that the sexual meaning of "spit roast" has now become more well known than the literal meaning of roasting something on a spit, and the slangy way of using it to describe an ass kicking or a humiliating defeat is completely forgotten

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My three girlfriends. And yes, they smoke weed.
thatâs really great man
seeing this post without the monologue is like seeing a single detached human arm lying on the sidewalk
naomi osaka for wimbledon 2026
âI worked 20-hour days to make Naomi Osakaâs Wimbledon dressâ
The Japanese designer Hana Yagi created the striking all-white bridal-inspired kimono that drew cheers from the crowd at the All England Club
The Japanese kimono and the traditional western wedding dress are difficult enough to walk in, let alone play tennis. But Naomi Osaka did so anyway, emerging on to Wimbledonâs Court 3 in a gown that was a hybrid of both garments to play a round of practice shots.
The dress, which drew cheers and wolf whistles from the crowd, was the Japanese playerâs latest fashion display, following the gold sequinned outfit that she wore at the French Open and her extravagant turquoise and green dress at the Australian Open in January. Her Wimbledon effort was the work of Hana Yagi, a 26-year old Japanese designer, who created it alone in ten days in her studio in Tokyo.
2026 French open, designed by Kevin Germanier in collaboration with Nike:
Yagi was asked to create an outfit for the âwalk onâ, when players enter the court before the beginning of a match, a well-established opportunity for fashion statements. At the French Open, Osaka compared her sparkling dress to the illuminations of the Eiffel Tower. Her extraordinary Australian Open outfit was inspired by jellyfish.
Australian Open 2026, designed by Robert Wun for Nike:
But Wimbledon imposes strict rules â above all that all clothes must be completely white (Roger Federer once got a telling-off for wearing shoes with orange soles). âFirst, it had to be all white,â says Yagi. âVisually, [Harper] gave me the image of a kimono or junihitoe [a traditional 12-layered kimono of the Japanese imperial court]. As a part of the concept, they wanted to reinterpret the tradition in the context of sport.â
The vintage wedding dresses she had in her own stock were cream and ivory â shades unacceptable at Wimbledon. She went to shops in Tokyo and bought the pure white western style wedding dress that forms the lower part of the Osaka gown, and a shiromuku, the traditional nuptial kimono in which brides are wrapped for delivery to their new husbands.
It is this, embroidered with brocade images of cranes and cherry blossoms, that forms the upper part of the dress, but drastically restructured to allow freedom of movement. âI didnât want her to walk with small steps â in this she wonât have any difficulty walking,â Yagi says. âAnd itâs not like a tight corset, but a dress that Naomi herself can adjust.â Osaka wore her playing dress, created by her sponsor Nike, below Yagiâs creation, so it had to be lighter than a conventional kimono. The other condition was that the player had to be able to put on and remove the dress quickly.
âIt was my first experience of that, because all my past works were art pieces, and not really aiming to be functional,â she says. âBut this has to come on and off in three minutes. I kept it putting it on myself over and over again to confirm that it worked.â The secret ingredient? Extensive strips of Velcro.
Some more of Naomi Osaka's show-stoppers:
US Open 2024. Designed by Yoon Ahn for Nike:
US Open 2025. Designed by Osaka herself: