there is no aesthetic

"They told Anakin he wasn't fit to be a Jedi" Yeah, was he? He was unhappy the whole time, broke all their rules and eventually slaughtered them.

"They massacred the Sith Order" Yeah. Those "I'm better than everyone and everything and they all should kneel to me or die" people? I see no issue here.

"They fought in the Clone Wars as peacekeepers." Yeah. What was the alternative? Standing by as the clones, civilians and the Republic itself (the best government out those in the galaxy, although admittedly that's rather a low bar) were massacred by the Separatists? Yeah no. And peacekeepers ≠ pacifists.

"They forbid marriage." They are a religious organization, monks. Fobidding its members from marrying is pretty standard in monasteries. They also aren't celibate, friendship isn't discouraged at all and it's all but stated by Obi-Wan in TCW S6 that romantic feelings are perfectly allowed. Several of the Order's members practice their home planets' culture and religion and language (Barriss has a Mirilian Idol in her room, she Luminara Quinlan etc have cultural tattoos, many characters have accents which implies Basic isn't their first language and others don't speak Basic at all,etc). They have no dress code, they are allowed to drink, smoke, etc., even become part of other religions organizations (see Plo Koon)! Marriage being forbidden is nothing, literally meaningless next to the freedom Jedi have.

If you're gonna critize the Jedi, they have to be wrong.

The worst thing that can happen to a superhero who crosses a line is public shunning, and any attempts to hold them accountable to a government body are typically a part of a villainous plot.

I truly think where some Star Wars fans struggle is that they want to believe they'd be the good guy if they were isekai'd / dropped into the Star Wars universe and they had the Force.

In the Star Wars universe, that typically means being a Jedi. They get cool powers and a dope laser sword -- BUT, unlike superheroes, the Jedi are a strongly collectivist community with governmental oversight. It's a syncretic faith practice that allows for some flexibility on certain tenets in highly specific scenarios, but otherwise requires adherence to it's strictures. It holds its practitioners accountable to their community and the Republic, to uphold their standards.

And for some fans, used to the superhero mindset of really having no accountability to anyone as long as you've got good intentions -- that makes the Jedi seem suspicious.

Something I've been having to say frequently the last couple months IRL is, "If you want to wear the hero's laurels, you've got to do the hero's journey."

If you want to be able to call yourself a Jedi, you've got to be able to sincerely attempt to adhere to the tenets of the faith. The Jedi are fairly forgiving when it comes to failure in canon / Legends -- there's consequences, but exile is reserved for heinous acts like murder.

Anakin's tragedy is that he refused to accept that he would have to choose between the Jedi and Padmé. He wanted to be a Jedi and all the prestige that comes with it, but he didn't want to follow the Jedi faith.

I suspect that fans who insist that the Jedi were wrong or that they somehow deserved to be eradicated, would fall into the same sort of trap in that scenario -- they want to be a good guy, which means being a Jedi, but they don't want to do the work to be Jedi -- ergo the Jedi must be wrong.

Nevermind that Star Wars is chock full of heroes without magic powers, wealth, or status (the real world super powers) like Finn, Jyn Erso, Cassian Andor, Poe Dameron, Rose Tico, Han Solo, Biggs Darklighter, Rex, Echo, Chewbacca, and every Rebel OC you can imagine.