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How do they choose which sand to be the glass and which sand to be the sand in an hourglass... Imagine you and your best friend were two grains of sand and you had to be in the hourglass and your bestie had to be the glass. Ur together but youve never been more apart. A Sick and twisted practice hourglassery is...

I FOUND IT GUYS I SPENT HALF AN HOUR LOOKING FOR THIS VIDEO AND ITS HERE

Always reblog peent.

omg!! omg

Forever reblog.

Heaven let your eent shine down.

i am tall enough that when i stand up in a public restroom i can see over the top of the stall door and stare myself in the eyes through the mirror reflection. i dislike this because it reminds me that i am in there, and by that i mean both my human body and the public restroom

Banishment is the funniest punishment I can think of. Just get out of here

#this is how the economy should function

The electronic signs outside of family owned seafood restaurants

Date a guy who opens your jars and wine bottles for you

“please. please stop opening all my jars and wine bottles. I’m not ready for them yet. you’re just letting it all go bad. my whole house smells like wine and pickles and I can’t live like this”

monkeys that have tails are so fucked up and scary they’re like the worst animals by far