you want to get into women's rugby. watch the video.
trying on a metaphor
we're not kids anymore.
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@magicalmanhattanproject
you want to get into women's rugby. watch the video.

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Times are hard at the cafe so they only got Something bagels
So I follow N. D. Stevenson (comics writer and animator, most famous for Nimona and She-Ra and the Princesses of Power) and his husband Lee Ostertag (also a comics writer and animator) on Instagram. When I started following them, they were both publicly presenting as women, and then a few years ago N. D. came out as transmasc nonbinary, and then earlier this year Lee also came out as transmasc. Anyway this is all setup to say that Lee had the chance to make the funniest post of all time and he took it:
Absolutely iconic.
I want to throw in that part of the context behind this meme was N.D. talking about how he sometimes gets hatemail for marrying a man as a former lesbian, and how many people seem to think he divorced his wife.
I have not managed to find anyone who thinks that in the wild, but it is so damn funny.
[ID: a Bluesky thread between ND Stevenson and Lee Ostertag. Stevenson's original post reads, "Latest strain of out-of-touch Instagram comment has been ugh of COURSE you'd end up with a man and like, TAKE IT UP WITH HIM HE'S THE ONE WHO DECIDED TO TURN INTO ONE". Ostertag's reply reads, "Omg are they saying I pass 💅 ". Stevenson's response reads, "LEE HELP YOURE DOING TOO GOOD A JOB THEY THINK I DUMPED MY WIFE FOR YOU". /end ID]
lmfao the Scots in town for the World Cup have made a pilgrimage to Boston's world-famous Cop Annihilating Slide
They were having a great time, probably an even better one now that Scotland beat Haiti 1-0.
im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

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So. Tyr, my dog, is a Great Pyraneese. This is important because this breed is known to be smart. Not in the way a German Shepherd or border Collie is smart, and wanting to please a human; Great Pyrs are independent minded and bred to Be Management of herds when a human might not be around.
Anyway.
It has been very pleasant out. We had the windows cracked and left them cracked when we went to work. This has never been an issue before.
My darling spouse was working on a job in a small town about a mile from our place. He was getting some stuff from the work van when he sees a large white dog prancing along.
"Huh." He thinks. "That looks an awful lot like.....TYR WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE."
Tyr, delighted that she has Found Father, bounds up happily and gets in the work van to give face kisses.
"GIRL NO WHAT." Kev says, scrambling to go let the client know that he has to take the fucking criminal back home real quick.
Turns out she discovered that a window can be shoved open with a determined snoot, and a window screen is not as strong as 80 pounds of muscular dog. And went for an adventure.
I got a call at this point while I was doing payroll.
"BABE WE NEED TO BABY GATE ALL THE FUCKING WINDOWS." My spouse says.
"....okay??" I say, and then get the story. I swore a bunch.
Anyway my dog is a criminal escape artist and we have to baby proof the fucking windows now
My mom thinks this is the funniest thing ever because I, Age 11, discovered I could remove window screens to climb out my window and climb the house roof to stargaze, which nearly gave her a heart attack when she looked out a window when hearing a noise and saw her fucking child squirreling around on the roof.
"Like mother like daughter" she texted me and then about 20 laughing emojis in a row
Twice a year in Hawaii the sun passes directly overhead and objects cast no shadow. It’s a phenomenon called “Lahaina Noon”
I have a greater claim to erudition than you. This fact would be obvious- (pause to smirk) were you as erudite as I.
Adam: Your older brother. Abel. He's dead.
Adams third child, Seth: What is that?
Adam: I don't know. This is new for me too.
Eve: I think "dead" is what happens to dinnerbeasts.
Seth:
Eve: We might have to dinner him.
That's one hell of a conspiracy theory you're believing, bud. Just out of curiosity, who's "they"?

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For clarity, when I said "don't push yourself", I didn't mean "don't ever test your physical and emotional limits"; I just meant maybe the Costco parking lot is not the place to conduct that particular experiment.
You think I'm just memeing here, but the Costco parking lot is in fact the perfect place to meet people who feel strongly that the only way to prove their manhood is to attempt to do The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift moves with a shopping cart containing two hundred kilos of Diet Coke.
#I know it's costco home of the bulk purchase #but that's A LOT of coke (via @kholden83)
Two hundred kilos of Diet Coke in standard 12oz cans works out to roughly sixteen bulk 32-packs, which you can totally fit on one of those flatbed utility carts without overstacking. I know this on account of having nearly been run over by one in a Costco parking lot by some dude who inadequately estimated the stopping distance of a quarter-ton on wheels on multiple separate occasions.
Another one for "objectively funny crimes should not be punished"
This is such a fantastic example what anticipation, overshooting, and settling actually *does* in animation, especially when you're new to learning it, be that 2d or 3d.
This is a bell curve meme to me
Because the obvious (and wrong) answer is that Magneto beats Tony easily because he can control Tony's armor and crush him
But the smarter (and wrong) answer is that Iron Man's armor isn't actually made of iron, it's made of a non-magnetic gold-titanium alloy.
But then the smartest and true answer is that Magneto beats Tony easily because Tony has metal shrapnel in his bloodstream that he needs a powerful electromagnet to stop from reaching his heart.
i need everyone to get into college football right now i am dying to talk about the texas tech situation. this is the kind of thing that will be referenced for the next 100 years. there will be documentaries and biopics about this.
no one asked but here
texas tech's quartback, brendan sorsby, was investigated for sports gambling. i know sports betting is all the rage right now, but athletes themselves are not allowed to do it. it is Rule Number 1 and it is the highest priority rule for the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA), who governs all athletic programs at about 1,100 colleges in the US.
the invesitagetion of sorsby revealed that, not only did he place more than 9,000 sports bets when he himself was a collegiate athlete, but 40 of those bets were AGAINST HIS OWN TEAM when he was playing at indiana university. immediately, this threatens the integrity of the sport, and especially because indiana is the hottest team right now as the defending national champion.
the NCAA, which is largely a sham organization these days (they've truly lost their grasp and college athletics are the wild west now) actually enforced their Number 1 Rule and told sorsby his career is over, that he would never play college football again (and, subsequently, that he would never get drafted into the NFL because his college career was cut short).
well, because the NCAA is a husk of its former self, sorsby and texad tech immediately took this to court. MANY athletes have learned these past few seasons that if you can find a judge who's a fan of your team, you can get any NCAA ruling overturned. that's exactly what texas tech did. they filed a suit in Lubbock, where the university is located and where every judge is an alum of texas tech. so sorsby was granted an injunction and will now only be suspended for the first 2 games od the 2026 season (which are alwayd against no-name teams that will be destroyed regardless of who's suspended).
every other school in the country immediately went on the defensive because this is a very clear integretiy issue. so nebraska and georgia (sic em dawgs) released statements saying that all currently-scheduled competitions witb Texas Tech in ANY sport will be canceled and there will be no future schedulings. at least 3 of the major conferences (SEC, Big 10, Big 12) , who account for almost all division 1 sports teams in the country, are also in discussions about cancelling comtests. Texas Tech is part of the Big 12, and there is serious talk of all other teams in the conference shutting texas tech out.
now would probably be time where i say that texas tech is one of the wealthiest programs in college football becaise there is a single billionaire alumnus pouring money into the program with hopes of essentially buying a championship. so texas techs integrity has always been questionable. anyway, the university president put oit a statement that he doesnt care that sorseby violated regulation and that texas tech will sue any school that refuses to play them because it jeopardizes their championship prospects if they're umable to play any games.
this is all just startomg but its so juicy and delicious. the NCAA is going to crumble to dust if they cannot get this injunction overturned. schools like georgia and nebraska have plenty of money so a suit isnt necessarily a concern, but this will absolutely change college football forever. i cant stop reading about it.
update on this: texas tech is claiming that every school who has/is considering cancelling all contests is "afraid" that texas tech is better than them. what's funny about this is that sorsby's stats are average. he is not good enough for this kind of protection. many schools who have already cancelled or are considering it have much better quarterbacks than sorsby. also, texas tech's head coach had said that it's actually ok that sorsby bet against his own team because it "its not murder or assault."
the attorney general of texas has threatened to investigate the Big 12 conference if they sanction Texas Tech
the claim is now that texas texh university just cares so much about brendan sorsbys mental health that they have to sue everyone who calls this an integrity violation. any other school who wouldnt defend an athlete that committed this violation "doesnt care about mental health"
the Big 12 has officially filed a federal lawsuit against Texas Tech and the attorney general of texas. i havent read it yet so idk what exactly it's seeking, though i would imagine its seeking permission to sanction texas tech through a Big 12 supermajority (which theyll have no problem achieving, if the suit is won). the attorney generals dor kansas and oklahoma have issued statememts of suppkrt for the Big 12 and condemn the AG of texas. the Big 10, the last conference we were waiting to hear from, has elected not to take any action against texas tech. the SEC is still in talks for a conference-wide action, but georgia is holding firm on its individual ban against texas tech.

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Brooch with hand forged fine silver lily of the valey flowers on a sterling stem. The leaf is a polished and sealed circuit board inlaid with opals.
dear smut writers,
to lave means to wash/bathe/lap at, and it's in basically every sex scene ever
a lathe is a machine that smoothes a spinning piece of wood or metal by cutting thin layers off it, and it's also in an unfortunate number of sex scenes
so when you say things like this:
I am imagining things like this:
@funnier-when-objectum
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