Coffee Makes Me Happy

i can teach you

t-teach me.. what??

This is the kind of sponsored post I’ve been waiting on

Do you think Jesus ever got many carpenter requests after he started preaching? Like did anyone ever go up to him and be like; "My Lord! My Lord!" And the disciples are all: "The Master won't do anymore miracles today." But obviously Jesus is like; "Yes, my child?" And they just ask what his basic rate is to fix their door.

No one talks enough about the fact that Jesus had a day job.

He repaired the relationship between humanity and god, he also repaired the table in his friend Mary's house cuz it wobbled too much.

“honey that guy who made our table got crucified” 

*sticks my hand in your nucleus and swirls your dna around*

I'm a prokaryote

using a fork and twirling it like spaghetti

aaatttctga caaacgttac agggtgctgc tctgcaacgg tcaccagact cccgctctcc aacaaggtac tcacagcagt agacaggtca ctgcgttgtc cttgagatct aggagctcca cactcgataa gtaagttgcc ttctttactg cagtattctt tattctgctg gtctgttcct ttcgctttct cgatgtggca gcgggcacca aaataccact tcactttatt aaaagtttgc ttcttcacaa aattagcgaa cccctgtagg tggggtgttc ggccttcctc attaccctcc tcgccaacaa taaaataatc aaatagggag attgggagct cccgtatttt cttgcgctcg tcttcggaag gattattgag agtgaacacc caccttttat gtggttgggg tccgcttctt ccattcttct tactgggcat gttgctgctg aggtgctgcc gaggtgctgc cgctgccgaa gtgcgctggt aatacttaca gcgcacttct ttcgttttca gctatgacgt atccaaggag gcgtttccgc agacgaagac accgcccccg cagccatctt ggccagatcc tccgccgccg cccctggctc gtccaccccc gccaccgtta ccgctggaga aggaaaaatg gcatcttcaa cacccgcctc tcccgcacca tcggttatac tgtcaagaaa accacagtca gaacgccctc ctggaatgtg gacatgatga gatttaatat taatgatttt cttcccccag gagggggctc aaaccccctc actgtgccct ttgaatacta cagaataagg aaggttaagg ttgaattctg gccctgctcc ccaatcaccc agggtgacag gggagtgggc tccactgctg ttattctaga tgataacttt gtaacaaagg ccaatgccct aacctatgac ccctatgtaa actactcctc ccgccatacc ataacccagc ccttctccta ccactcccgg tactttaccc cgaaacctgt ccttgatggg acaatcgatt acttccaacc caataacaaa agaaatcaac tctggctgag actacaaact actggaaatg tagaccatgt aggcctcggc actgcgttcg aaaacagtat atacgaccag gactacaata tccgtataac catgtatgta caattcagag aatttaatct taaagacccc ccacttaacc ctaagtgaat aataaaaacc attacgaagt gataaaaaag actcagtaat ttatttcata tggaaattca gggcatgggg gggaaagggt gacgaactgg cccccttcct ccgtggattg ttctgtagca ttcttccaaa ataccaagga agtaatcctc cgatagagag cttctacagc taggacagca gttgaggagt accattccaa cggggtctga ttgctggtaa tcagaatact gcgggccaaa aaaggtacag ttccaccttt agtctctaca gtcaatggat atcgatcaca cagtctcagt agatcatccc acggcagcca accataaaag tcatcaataa caaccacttc ttcaccatgg taaccatccc accacttgtt tcgaggtggt ttccagtatg tggtttccgg gtctgcaaaa ttagcagccc atttgctttt accacaccca ggtggcccca caatgacgtg tacattggtc ttccaatcac gcttctgcat tttcccgctc actttcaaaa gttcagccag cccgcgg

I'm not translating all of that

lass it's a genome

yeah, t-something bacteriophage if memory serves

why

eh

yeah im “transitioning” *dissolves into tiny pieces as i click to the next slide*

nobody really drops anvils that make people have funny birds and stars spin around their head anymore… they should do start doing that again

So true, btw can you stand on this x over here? I think there’s buried treasure under there

treasure? YIPPEE!!! (starts digging!!!!!)

THOUSAND ENERGY BEAMS ATTACK

I love this genre of tumblr posts that’s basically the online equivalent of playing power rangers on the playground

if you’re not paying attention to trees and how they sway in the wind then what are you even doing

found a twitter tweet that was like "oh yeah content warning hatoful boyfriend has a lot of gore and violence" and every single person in the notes/retweets/qrts/whatever the fuck terms twitter has was going "WHAT THE FUCK IT HAS WHAT" and i find that hilarious because. large amounts of gore and violence is a tremendous understatement about the amount of stuff that goes down in hatoful boyfriend