Bits Of A Star Gone Wrong

pulling my tamagotchi out of my pocket in the same way a distinguished old man would check his pocket watch

Would it be considered “gay” to go for a walk in the evening?

yes like obviously

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of

Most annoying online emotion is "I have a funny personal anacdote to add to this but it doxxes like all of my personal information"

me and my losing dog think you suck btw

one of the funnier incidents of me assuming someone knew a meme irl was when a new coworker was talking about some woman who got arrested for tax fraud and I went "God forbid women do anything" and he got scared and thought I was accusing him of being sexist, so he started apologizing and saying how tax fraud isn't even bad, actually.

my tea bag broke

Guy who is about to give birth to leafs

“I would eat his heart in the marketplace” is legit the most savage line I have ever heard, I’d like to personally thank Shakespeare for putting into words that feeling of rage and protectiveness women get when some fuckboy hurts another woman

Okay first off, I will always reblog this post, but secondly, I went to Shakespeare in the Park tonight to see this and all the women cheered *so loudly* when Beatrice said this line, and the guy in front of me looked around all shocked and a little scared and said “… oh wow” and it was ICONIQUE

video game and film fandoms will come and go for me but the Silmarillion fandom will never die. because that book came out like 50 years ago and we're all still trying to figure out what the hell is going on there.

Wishing you a relaxed nervous system

fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle