Locus Negotium

"officer you dont understand, it's empowering"

It goes like this:

Women being trafficked and forced into prostitution is an atrocity and should be stopped - at this point everyone is still in agreement.

What happens to them is rape - everyone pretty much agrees with this still.

And then: If there are EXTREMELY OBVIOUS warning signs that the prostitute in question is likely a victim of trafficking*, every single john who had sex with her anyway should be prosecuted for rape.

So many people froth at the mouth at the mere suggestion. They get furious if you suggest that this should be the law. But I think nothing could be more reasonable. Trafficking and forced prostitution flourishes because "normal" johns do not care if the prostitute they are paying is there voluntarily. They do not have to care (unless, maybe, if she is underage). Nothing will happen to him.

I say: Make johns deathly afraid of a prostitute possibly being trafficked. I want it to ruin lives to rape a woman who is clearly being forced to prostitute herself.

But no, apparently that's a horrible and hateful stance to have.

Men weaponize suicide so much you couldn't pay me to give af about male suicidality.

Literally one of my first ever boyfriends constantly threatened suicide. And was sad that I was skipping a grade so he talked the principal into letting him skip a grade too (even though he was low key illiterate and in no way qualified for advancement and actually NEEDED extra time to study).

Thinking back on that situation now is kinda crazy. Lmao Like I skipped a grade because I was top 3 in class and he skipped a grade despite having horrible grades because he threw a tantrum??

yet if both same-sex attraction and opposite-sex attraction can co-occur within a human being, then what does that say about the diverse spectrum of human sexuality and the bullshit boundaries patriarchy draws around what orientations are or aren’t acceptable?

interestingly, what biphobes always seem to fixate on is that bisexuals somehow bring heterosexuality closer to homosexuals or homosexuality closer to heterosexuals (in whatever way), which feels threatening to both parties, albeit for different reasons. but it’s the fundamental heart of biphobia. the fear of shared humanness and diversity in humanity’s sexual expression. i’ve observed it plenty of times: the straight man/woman’s terror that they could be gay. that the “other” could look—on some level—exactly like them. could relate to them. that same-sex attraction can come as naturally to a person as opposite-sex attraction.

-because bisexual asylum seekers fleeing their countries are more often rejected compared to homosexual asylum seekers since they’re assumed to be lying about their persecution (and the biphobia also negatively harms homosexual people who have had a history of sexual assault with heterosexual people)

-because bisexual people are at higher risk of intimate-partner violence, with bisexual women being 61% more likely to experience domestic violence compared to heterosexual women (because biphobes like you still insist that heterosexuals like and celebrate bisexuals and so being het-partnered automatically shields us from being discriminated and abused for our sexualities when it's oftentimes the opposite--and if we are abused, too many of you are comfortable saying we "earned it" for "choosing the wrong side" because you still hold to the biphobic belief that bisexuality is transient)

-because bisexuals are punished and ostracized for not being heterosexual or homosexual enough, leading to them having the highest rates of suicide, drug abuse and even poverty within the LGB community (if they even have access to such a thing)

-(this trend might also suggest bisexual women and youth are at a slightly higher risk of being trafficked or otherwise sexually exploited for money, since lack of support/community, poverty and homelessness are risk factors for sexual exploitation)

-because biphobia like yours is part of a long-running tradition in LGB spaces that discourages bisexuals from calling themselves bisexuals (many bisexuals have identified as gay or lesbian because of the disdain bisexuality gets—adding to bi-erasure and intracommunity discord when "previously gay/lesbian" people come out)

-because bisexual men were demonized by straight women and overall society during the AIDs crisis and that is still a continuing trend today (treating bisexual men specifically as filthy, disease-riddled, inhuman cheaters solely for their bisexuality), which has led to obstacles in their access to help compared to gay and straight men

-because bisexual people (including children) are met with hostility both from homosexuals and heterosexuals, contributing to their isolation and the resulting mental health issues (community is often the only saving grace of oppressed groups)

-because there have been multiple attempts from homosexuals to erase bisexual contributions to gay and lesbian liberation and history

-because heterosexuals have committed to erasing bisexual people from history in general

-because when bisexual people die or are murdered, they are retroactively painted to be either entirely gay or entirely straight—never bisexual (Whitney Houston, Freddie Mercury, Jamey Rodemeyer, etc)

-because bisexuals have historically and are currently treated as mentally unstable due to bi-ness alone (which persists to this day)(also, bisexuality is seen to be an unstable/transient sexuality which has allowed both straight and homosexual people to co-opt the identity with little to no regard for bisexual people)

-because some people still believe bisexual people can’t be gender non-conforming when they very often are (interestingly, transgender people in one study were more likely to identify as bisexual than anything else, which correlates with the fact that in the US at least, trans people are the only demographic within the LGBT to be generally more impoverished than bisexual women, though not by much)

-because bisexual people remain in the closet at higher rates than homosexuals

-because there is still a trend of homosexual people being hostile to dating bisexual people on the basis of bi-ness alone (in a small dating pool where a good chunk don’t want to date you, heterosexuals are a comparatively over-abundant pool—yet they still abuse their bisexual partners)(this also isn't to say that not wanting to date a bisexual is necessarily biphobia, but that basing one's decision on whether or not one should date a bisexual on biphobic stereotypes like "I don't want to sleep with a slut" or "can't date a bi-man because he'll give me HIV" without considering the individuality of the person is biphobic)(you are allowed your preferences, but that doesn't mean they are somehow divorced from politics and how people talk about bisexuals shows that many "preferences" are due to their own deeply cherished dehumanization of bisexual people)

-because heterosexuals hate bi people because they're bi and not just because they're attracted to the same sex (most negative stereotypes about bisexual people being inherently suspicious, confused or promiscuous are created and perpetuated by heterosexuals)

-because any attempt to discuss the specific ways in which heterosexism affects us results in biphobes like you coming to silence the discussion and deny that we have anything going on outside either homosexuality or heterosexuality and that serves as a barrier to our self-definition in data and history (which further fuels your confirmation biases about us since bisexuals will continue to hide their true selves from both hets and people like you in order to survive) and gets us erased and harmed even more efficiently by heteropatriarchy

-because bisexual experiences cannot be subsumed by heterosexual experiences or homosexual experiences (even while intersecting with both) no matter how many people keep insisting they can

So for whose benefit do we need to go slowly? How can white men be our born leaders and at the same time so fragile that they cannot handle social progress?"

she could literally be the worst woman in the world, but if she were male, you wouldn’t have called her a bitch. there is no “i don’t normally call women this but she’s being a bitch”. you wanted to target and insult her femaleness specifically. her sex is inherently linked with your insult. that makes you misogynistic, flinging an insult based on someone’s sex.

also, if you call a man a bitch, you are degrading him on the basis of being comparable to a woman. it implies to be [female-aimed slur] is particularly degrading. you are also a misogynist for that.

Treating fetishes themselves, no matter how 'immoral' they might be (I put that in quotation marks because until acted upon they really are just hypothetical) as reasons to not love people in a marginalized group, especially one vulnerable to the abuse that creates those fetishes, is really fucked up. Predatory actions are worthy reasons to withdraw love, yes, but just fetishes? I don't see this attitude to the many many cis women with rape kinks.

And no, I'm not defending whichever bad person you're talking about, but just about every time I see posts like this, even if I agree with the criticism against the user, it's always mixed with 'oh and they have an incest kink? Isn't that weird and fucked up?' The biggest reason those blogs you hate have followers is because they don't make people feel ashamed of involuntary attractions, and they don't tell them they're just as bad as abusers (including their own!) whether they've committed abuse or not!

And I've seen people say 'well thoughtcrime isn't real but it's not thoughts when you post it' it is actually. It's not concrete proof anything has happened. And I think that if done properly with warnings and tags and consent, expression of irl unacceptable desires is healthy. Staying silent in shame and disgust isn't.

People say it trivialises real abuse, but I think what really does that is treating someone who's a victim of abuse as having the same moral standing as their abuser because of a kink they didn't choose to have.

The last time I tried to make this point I got called a rape apologist, was told I was a danger to trans women and survivors (I am both of those), and that I should kill myself. Twice. And I hadn't even said that I have the maligned kinks!

it's telling that the first thing you went to is "they don't make me feel ashamed for my thoughts." when people talk about people who are publicly posting about their pedophilic, zoophilic, rape and racist fetishes, when they talk about how those people mock and actively harass those opposed to these posts - including victims of some of those forms of abuse! - the first thing you go to is "but this could be about me and it makes me feel bad :(" it's literally just this image but for everything

And I've seen people say 'well thoughtcrime isn't real but it's not thoughts when you post it' it is actually.

you are stupid and there is no hope for you if this is what you think lol. a thought stops being a thought when you share it for other people to perceive. we live in a world where people get monitored and arrested for planning terror attacks where the first things that flagged them to police attention are them going on beyonce's internet and going "I am planning a terrorist attack" on social media.

the idea that everyone with these fetishes is somehow someone with personal lived experience is ignorant of the fact that these fetishes exist to perpetuate the status quo of the world at large. pedophiles, contrary to what people on this website like to bawl about, are ubiquitous in society, and abuse real children - they have pedophilic fetishes. rapists are ubiquitous in society and rape real people - they have rape fetishes.

the way the people whining about being oppressed and Shamed, the Worst Thing You Can Make Someone Feel Ever, talk about these fetishes is not that of someone who abhors the real phenomenon but indulges in it for their sexuality. there are people literally posting NAMBLA material as part of their pro-pedophile advocacy related to their pedophilic fetishes on their website.

we exist in a real world where these things happen and are perpetuated by people who enjoy them. whatever "well I can't help it" "I'm coping" rationale you have doesn't change the fact that when you engage with this in public spaces you are engaging with it in the company of people who like these things because they enjoy the very real physical harm that these things bring to people, and I think it says a lot about you and people like you that you're more worried about feeling Judged than the fact that these communities are infested with real pedophiles and rapists. like pedophiles abuse real children, rapists rape real people, zoophiles abuse real animals, racists abuse real people.

the way you're talking about this the only alternative to posting to a public 13+ (that means children use it) social media website on a non-age-gated account about how much you (as in a random user) love raping kids is simply mentally torturing yourself into despair is fucking embarrassing and you should be embarrassed for even bringing that up in the first place.

the internet is not a private space. your public social media accounts are not private spaces. people would not even know these things about you to judge you for them if others participated in them in private space - but they want to eat their cake and have it too by posting about things that other people revile and still feeling like it's a crime to merely judge them for it.

—

PBS: Language as Prejudice - Myth #6: Women Talk Too Much (via misandry-mermaid)

Every EVERY women’s studies class I’ve been in has had this problem and failed to address it. 

The genius of any slave system is found in the dynamics which isolate slaves from each other, obscure the reality of a common condition, and make united rebellion against the oppressor inconceivable.