Limnaia

Batman: *examining a crime scene with his kids, grunts*

Red Robin: *cocks head an inch to the left, then leaves the rooftop to take care of a mugging*

Batman: *turns his head a fraction to look at Spoiler*

Spoiler: *midway through wrapping a lucky knife graze on her leg, holds up bandage*

Batman: *softer grunt, turns head another fraction to look at Black Bat*

Black Bat: *thumbs up, falls backwards off the roof edge to go help Red Robin*

Military guy: what the fuck

Batman: *produces small flashlight from pocket, points it at evidence nearby*

Robin: -tt- *begins bagging the evidence*

Batman: *flicks flashlight at a wall 30m away*

Nightwing: on it, B! *stops walking on his hands and goes to get the surveillance footage*

Red Hood, who has been slowly prowling in circles around the crime scene, with his guns out, seemingly ignoring everyone: *heavy sigh through the modulator*

Batman: *ignores*

Hood: *hesitates on a step*

Batman: *spins round, looking for the enemy*

Hood: *waves him off, recognising the person five roofs away as Huntress*

Batman: *returns to scene with a grunt*

Random military guy: VERBAL-

Robin: Do you really need your orders spelled out for you? Mother ensured I grew out of that by the time I was five.

Random military guy: wha-

Robin: You've not even been following the conversation we've all been having, have you? Civilians are so rude.

Random military guy: Who are you calling a civilian?!

Red Hood: This is Gotham. Who are *you* calling a civilian, army boy?

Random military guy: I am never letting myself be talked into vigilante-wrangling again. The Lanterns were fine, but not in Gotham. Never again.

Hood: S'what I thought. Relax, new guy, we'll have you out of city limits by dawn and you can go back to your cushy job on base.

Random military guy: Cushy, are you ki-

Spoiler: You get paid, my man. That's automatically cushy.

Batman: *wounded grunt*

Spoiler: No, you cannot just pay for my apartment. I will steal your credit cards and do it myself, like a grown up.

Batman: *hums*

Robin: You realise you just told him that he's indirectly paying your rent and he's going to be skipping around the cave now.

Spoiler: *finishing wrapping the bandage* Gotta throw him a bone sometimes.

Spoiler: Especially because I think this knife may have been poisoned.

Batman: *abandons crime scene, scoops Spoiler up and leaps off the roof to the Batmobile in less than five seconds*

Random military guy: Insane. You are all insane.

At which point they will find an ovarian cyst, but they now get whatever fucked up satisfaction they derive out of proving you wrong, because you didn't believe it could a cyst at all, but guess what? They did find a cyst! It's such a good thing you didn't listen to your intuition and came to them to verify your lay diagnosis from that third party! Bonus? Doctor doesn't have to feel like they look stupid in front of a patient, which is really what all this is about. Not your health, why would you think your medical diagnosis is about your health? It's obviously about a doctor's potential ego.

And apparently this works. Apparently you just need to be able to always play 4D chess with your medical professionals in order to find an avenue of advocating for yourself and getting you medical needs met. Isn't that great?

“Liar.”

BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND

Clark looks up from his computer at the new intern. “Oh, no,” he says. “You caught me.”

“Clark, you pull this shit every time, man,” his desk neighbor Steve says. “Shut the fuck up.”

“No, the kid’s right, I’m Superman,” Clark says. He gets out of his seat and cracks his back out. “I guess we’re gonna have a superhero fight.”

“Clark, sit back down.”

“Nope. Superhero fight.”

“Clark if you don’t sit the hell back down and finish your article by lunch I am going to tell Perry on you.”

Clark points at the intern. “You get off easy this time, buddy,” he says, and sits back down. 

“So…” the intern says, very lost. “Uh…”

Intern: “Ahahahah Superman in Kansas tilling the fields at superspeed, that’s a good one. What, if the tractor breaks down, do you just pick it up and take it back to the barn?”

Clark: “Nah, between my ex-ray vision and my heat vision I can generally find whatever the problem is and do a spotweld if necessary so long as I know where to get the parts - once had to nip over to South Korea because I didn’t want to wait 6 weeks for the ship to get there.”

Intern: “Bahahaha classic, Clark you are so funny! Superman fixing tractors with his heat vision, oh that’s a good one.”

Have you guys seen that clip

I am reading Tim Curry’s 2025 memoir, Vagabond

and in it, he not only devotes a chapter to Muppet Treasure Island, but also references this very post

so, to recap

no, Tim Curry is absolutely NOT a Muppet; however

And he was all "fuck yeah, thanks God"

And then all the other Sesame Street character accounts joined in:

And now I’m thinking maybe we’re gonna be okay… 💗

"So, boss... I may have messed up."

"What did you do, Ray?"

"Well, I made a post for Elmo saying 'Hi, how's everybody doing?'"

"I mean, that's kind of what we pay you for."

"Yeah, but.... <sigh> it turns out pretty much everyone is hanging on by a thread, badly enough that they needed to tell Elmo."

"Oh."

"God help me, boss, I think Elmo needs to be there for them."