I'm not sure what you want from me here...

when i was a child for multiple halloweens in a row my costume of choice was “fancy lady” who was a character i invented who looked like this

The worst-sounding piece of advice I've ever been given that does actually work is to frame your health concerns as coming from someone close to you, whom you do not believe. Tell your doctor that you've been having pain and your mom/friend/partner thinks it might be an ovarian cyst, but you don't think so because the pain is much more intense and it has to be something else. This gives your doctor an unseen third party to fight instead of you. They can't just tell this third party, who isn't present, that you pulled a muscle, they now need to prove to this third party that it is not an ovarian cyst.

best advice I have for therapy is that you can’t go in there expecting your shrink to be robin williams from good will hunting, or florence nightingale, or your mom, or god, or the emotional equivalent of a housekeeper. also can’t cede them the power of letting them be the primary source for your psychoeducation.

You are allowed to disagree with your therapist. You are allowed to say "I think you might be off-base about this." Sometimes they put the cart before the horse or don't understand your personal chronology. I'm seeing someone who wants to pin my quitting smoking on some other problems. No, these issues existed before I quit smoking, that's not an accurate assessment. She didn't seem to believe me because for her it would have been a very tidy cause -> effect. I had to clarify things for her. You are not correct. That's not what this is. Try again