when people try to make their (shallow at best) feminism sound inclusive to nonbinary people but accidentally let slip their prejudices in the process. "men aren't pretty, women and nonbinary people are pretty." "fuck men, I only like women and nonbinary people." and ofc the classic "safe space for women and nonbinary people, no men allowed." like damn that's crazy. can't wait until you find out about nonbinary men too though 😑. or, can't wait until you find out about masculine nonbinary people in general tbh, cause I know they're not who u have in mind with these statements. by choice and not there's nonbinary people out there who look and present exactly how u imagine binary men do, of all ages, and maybe you need to wrap your cute little head around that before even attempting to speak on "nonbinary rights" or whatever.
like, if ur including 18 yr old she/they demigirls who don't want to go on T but always wear pronoun pins in your activism, that's great. but if you want to speak on nonbinary people as a whole group, you're also speaking on 30-something year old he/him men who're already balding, who have full beards, who are stealth as cis men (if not cishet men) in their workplaces, who aren't twink-y and who might not own a single piece of make-up, and who may or may not be physically transitioning. And when they say they're nonbinary they're just as nonbinary as the first example I gave.
this is why "men vs non-men" doesn't work. some people are both. some people aren't both, but by your prejudice standards might cross the line. ffs some nonbinary people are a woman and ALSO a man. there is no secondary binary you can salvage out of this. and if you don't reframe your nonbinary activism to include these people and support these people too, you are a bad activist and frankly being transphobic -- not only towards masculine nonbinary people, but also towards the feminine/androgynous nonbinary people who you're not so subtly trying to simplify to "woman-lite".
