i'm not a model citizen so what

boyy am I in the mood to feel someone’s body weight on top of me

Picking strawberries with a beautiful girl and I’m not even smiling I’m just picking the most strategic berries so we can leave and I can go answer emails

bro doesn’t even have a certain je ne sais quoi

some movies are extremely good and well made but will never be your favorite and some movies are just unbelievably bad but they are your bestest friend and i recommend both types as though they were the same. which is why my dad doesnt trust me when i suggest a movie

we’re all boring to someone, annoying to someone, ugly to someone, but it’s not that deep

i will admit i have looked upon men with a lustful gaze in my time

we exist for love btw

they should just put random people’s faces on money

like when you get your picture taken at  the DMV there’s a chance you’re the 5 dollar bill now